


Fathoms Below

by Actual_Pixie



Category: Free!
Genre: Haruka changes genders like a fish, Hermaphrodites, M/M, idk if that needed a trigger warning so there it is?, mention of HaruNitori, mention of RinHaru, mention of miscarriage, merman Haruka, merman au, original mermaid folklore, repost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-17
Updated: 2015-04-25
Packaged: 2018-02-13 14:08:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 60,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2153493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Actual_Pixie/pseuds/Actual_Pixie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When stumbling home from a party one night, the last thing Makoto expects is to rescue an injured merman. An inexplicable attraction leads to a romance seemingly doomed from the start, for the more Makoto learns of the alluring Haruka, the more dangerous things become not just for himself, but Haruka’s entire species.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Well, well, well.  
> Look who's back!
> 
> Many people asked, and so I've decided after my edits that Fathoms Below will return to AO3 only. All the chapters (including the original one shots) will be included in this one story.

Hazuki Nagisa had always been fond of throwing parties, but even more than that he liked to drag his friends along with him to parties hosted by others. The habit only became worse once he’d joined a fraternity and there were events to attend nearly every other weekend. 

Tachibana Makoto learned the hard way to not even bother making excuses to get out of it. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t a fan of alcohol, or that being around an intoxicated mass of their peers made him uncomfortable. Once Nagisa made a plan, it was impossible for Makoto to talk his way out of it – it had been that way ever since they were kids, and even if Nagisa wouldn’t care, Makoto didn’t think he could leave the boy he’d grown up with, come to view as a little brother, unattended with a bunch of wasted Frat boys just waiting to pour alcohol down any innocent first year’s throat. 

At first it hadn’t been so bad. He’d exchanged pleasantries with some classmates he didn’t see as often, accepted a drink from the party’s host, flirted a little with some sorority girls, and made empty promises to Nagisa’s Frat brothers about rushing next semester. 

An hour turned into two, and the fraternity’s vow to get all new pledges shitfaced seemed well on its way to being fulfilled. Despite his smaller size, Nagisa held his alcohol like a champ, and it served an endless source of amusement for his new brothers. They urged more shots into his hands and Nagisa laughed and tossed them back without batting an eyelash. 

The sight made Makoto’s stomach churn, and in the back of his mind surfaced a niggling worry about alcohol poisoning. His overprotective tendencies had earned him the nickname ‘Mama-Mako’ a long time ago, and he forced himself away from the sight before he could do anything embarrassing like pull Nagisa away and make him eat something to curb the inevitable sickness. 

A short distance away, a bonfire crackled. A small group danced around it to the pounding bass of a portable stereo. Others gathered in clusters, passing gossip back and forth along with their cans of beer. Two sorority girls attempted karaoke, to a chorus of sniggers and catcalls from their gathered audience. 

It was as good a chance as any to sneak away.

He’d gone along with Nagisa’s wishes by showing up, and thus Nagisa couldn’t accuse Makoto of being antisocial. Most likely Nagisa hitch a ride with one of his new Brothers and crash at their place, but just in case Makoto checked the volume settings on his cell as he meandered over the harsh rocks separating the lavish house from the soft beach sands.

He walked. This far south, not much land separated one side of the island from the other. It was something he both liked and disliked about Iwatobi. Small-town living suited him just fine, but it annoyed him to no end how even when he neared the docks by his own apartment he could still hear the _thump_ of bad hip-hop.

He heard the scream first, but it was the proceeding eerie silence that spurred Makoto into action. Sand flung up in the wake of his feet as he ran as fast as he could manage toward the dock. Water from the high tide lapped at the cuffs of his jeans as he came to a sliding halt, his green eyes impossibly wide at the sight before him. 

Maybe he was more of a lightweight than he’d originally thought. There was no other way he could believe what he was seeing. 

It had to be a trick, his imagination running away with him, because there was that long, shimmering tail that curled and thrashed in the water, and attached to it, a young – man? – moaning in pain…. 

Makoto fought to remember how to breathe, and it took longer than he would care to admit for his brain to regain enough sensibility to call the rest of his body into action. When he’d recovered at least his basic motor skills, Makoto stumbled closer. His legs were like lead weights, unwilling to move with any coordination. Makoto wasn't sure when, but the tail - which he now recognized had been thrashing from the tear leaking blood around the body - had somehow split up where it met the abdomen, almost shedding like skin, though Makoto couldn't see any fleshy or bloody remnants. 

There was certainly a distressing amount of blood. If nothing else, it tinted the surrounding water and stained the sand around the body. If Makoto didn’t do something, it would soon attract undesirable attention. Iwatobi Harbor already had a problem with sharks; the last thing he wanted was for his favorite beach to become their new territory. 

He lurched forward – then stopped himself, scrubbed at his eyes vigorously, and looked again. 

Had he imagined the wound? No, it had definitely been there!

But it wasn’t there anymore. Just smooth, pearlescent skin leading down to azure scales, entirely unblemished but still spotted with blood. Makoto hoped he’d imagined the tail too, but it continued to beat against the waves, dispelling all common sense. 

The creature cried out again, his fingers digging into the sand, and startled Makoto into action. He quickly scooped the creature up into his arms, mindful of each little wince and gasp of pain and trying not to jostle the body too badly. Once he had a secure hold, Makoto dashed back up the beach, away from the water. Blood from the unknown wound seeped into his crisp white shirt, but Makoto hardly noticed. 

"Come on, let’s get you home."

 

*** * * ***

_Everything's going to be all right._

Makoto repeated the mantra to himself as he inhaled one deep breath after another and tried to keep the world from spinning out of focus.  _Everything's going to be all right._

It didn't work, just like the last attempt to calm his nerves hadn't worked, because how could he do anything but freak out when there was, for lack of a better term, a merman currently unconscious in his bathtub? 

This was the  _furthest thing_ from all right. 

At least he no longer lived with his parents. 

Makoto physically shook himself, and then smacked the sides of his face for good measure. He had to keep it together. If he couldn't even get a hold of himself, how on earth could he be expected to nurse a merman back to health? 

He used the term 'mer _man_ ' loosely. With the absence of breasts on the shallow chest, Makoto could only assume the creature was male, although a lack of visible genitalia made it impossible to confirm that. 

As Makoto performed a cursory check of the body – unearthing no obvious injury, giving him no choice but to believe the slash in the tail nothing more than a product of his imagination –the merman shifted in the tub, a soft series of clicks resounding from the back of his throat. Makoto froze, eyes darting up to the youthful face as he wondered for possibly the thousandth time what he'd gotten himself into. Handling the unconscious merman had been one thing, and terrifying enough in its own right, but he hadn't even considered what he'd do once the creature awoke. 

Blame it on too many movies and fantasy novels, but some part of him honestly assumed the merman would know how to speak like a human being. Now his face flushed as he realized how absolutely ridiculous a notion that was. Mermaids lived in the ocean; of course their way of communicating would be different – more like the language of whales or dolphins than man. 

The merman's eyes cracked open, and Makoto's thought process stalled at the vibrant shade of blue peeking out beneath dark lashes. They were like small oceans themselves, those eyes, and for the first time in his life, rather than afraid, Makoto itched to dive in. 

Until a trill of panic reached his ears and he instinctively jerked back, at a loss to do anything but watch the merman thrash mindlessly in the narrow pool of water. 

The sight of him scrambling for purchase on the smooth porcelain tub stirred Makoto back into action. Cautiously he approached, guilt weighing heavily on his heart as the merman's frightened eyes locked onto his briefly. 

"Hey," he whispered, trying for the most soothing voice he could manage. 

The merman tilted his head back, mouth opening slightly to reveal a neat little row of pointy teeth before closing to release a particularly distressed whistle. 

Makoto hesitated at the thought of those teeth chomping down on him, but no battle had ever been won without a certain amount of risk. Steeling himself, he settled his hands gently on the merman – one on his shoulder and another in his silken black hair. "You're okay. I promise, I'm not going to hurt you." 

He made faint, cooing sounds as he brushed the hair back, and slowly but surely the merman stopped moving altogether. Makoto kept combing his fingers through his hair, letting several minutes pass in silence before easing back. The merman followed his movements cautiously until Makoto knelt beside the tub, and then the blue eyes began to travel about the rest of the room. When they found Makoto again they were significantly less guarded; he must have deemed the room safe enough. 

Makoto smiled. "Hi," he said lamely. 

The merman cocked his head to the side, opened his mouth, and then promptly snapped it shut again. 

"I'm sorry I frightened you. I didn't mean to, I just—I didn't know what else to do." With a nervous laugh, Makoto scratched the back of his neck. "You looked like you were bleeding when I found you. I couldn't just leave you there..." 

His voice trailed off when the merman opened his mouth again, releasing a soft, questioning hum that sounded like a suspicious parody of the word  _'hi_ '.

 Sighing, Makoto wracked his brain to come up with a way to explain the situation the merman might actually understand. Inspiration struck in the form of a game he used to play with his friends in elementary school. Makoto pointed to himself. "I," he began, and then held out his hands, "took a walk on the beach." He walked two fingers across the flat of his palm. 

The merman leaned forward and grasped Makoto's wrist in a way that distinctly reminded him of the way his little sister had latched onto teething rings when she was still a baby. 

"You have no idea what I'm saying, do you?" 

The question garnered no reply – not that Makoto had honestly expected one. The merman busied himself with Makoto's hand, and Makoto couldn't help but laugh as his hand was turned this way and that, held up to the light and pushed down into the bath water. The noise died in his throat when the merman aligned their hands, iridescent, delicately webbed digits to his blunt, calloused fingers. 

After a moment, and with a small amount of regret, Makoto freed his hand and rose to his feet. He needed to find the first aid kit, in case it turned out the merman really was injured somewhere.

As he moved over to the medicine cabinet, a series of clicks followed. Makoto glanced over his shoulder, amused by the wonder he saw reflected in those too-blue eyes. He took the first aid kit, a roll of bandages, and a small bottle of antiseptic over to the tub, and almost dropped it all when one of the merman's slender hands darted out to grab his ankle. 

"What—what is it?" 

It was stupid to ask questions – he knew the merman didn't comprehend – but the reaction had been automatic. Thankfully the merman didn't seem to exhibit any signs of pain, and he no longer looked afraid. The gleam in his eyes was curious more than anything, although Makoto detected a small amount of possessiveness in the way those spindly fingers curled against his skin. Or maybe he was just reading too much into things. 

"Um—" Makoto shifted uncomfortably as the merman tugged insistently at his leg. "I can't get in the tub with you." 

The merman blinked. His tail curved up only to slap back against the tile wall, sending a flurry of water droplets into the air. Blue eyes flickered between azure scales to Makoto's tanned skin before, slowly, the merman drew his fingers up Makoto’s leg. Makoto stiffened, a shiver chasing down his spine at the feather-light touch along his calf. He'd call it sensual if not for the childlike interest on the merman's face. 

"Th-they're legs," he explained, as he politely attempted to step away from the merman's nosy fingers. The merman seemed to have taken special interest pushing his kneecap slightly to the side, clicking enthusiastically at the observation that the cartilage surrounding the bone allowed for such movement. "Nothing special. Not like that." He nodded to the long tail, which he'd been resisting the urge to explore in greater detail since he first made his discovery on the beach. "Well, I guess they would be special to you." He doubted the merman came across many pairs of legs in his lifetime.

The merman frowned and sat up straighter, tail sliding over the rim of the tub so the frayed edges of the base fin touched Makoto's toes. It didn't feel slimy like ordinary fish scales, and that alone was enough for Makoto's own curiosity to get the better of him. 

There was no more blood in the water, no sign of an injury at all. Maybe he was still imagining now, the merman nothing more than a trick of his mind, an especially vivid dream, and he’d soon wake up to Nagisa teasing him for passing out at the party. Whatever the case, Makoto sunk down on his knees beside the tub, trembling hands sliding up over wet scales. Some of the scales flaked beneath his fingertips, fluttering down into the water. 

"Is this okay?" The words rushed from his lips in a shaky exhale. As if granting permission the merman pressed into his touch, continuing to stare with his inquisitive eyes. Makoto licked his lips, tasting the pungent tang of saltwater that clung to the air surrounding the creature, and noticed the merman copy him. There was no mistaking it this time – the lilting hum forming a distinct ' _oooo-khhh'_. 

The merman attempted this a few times before settling into a rapid torrent of clicks and whistles again as he reached impatiently for Makoto's leg once more. Their current position did not afford him an ideal view of Makoto's legs, however, and he seemed to realize very quickly because his hand suddenly moved to Makoto's forearms in a surprisingly powerful grip. Before Makoto knew it he was toppling forward, bath water sloshing as he landed in the tub. 

His hands darted out to secure a grip on the tub while the merman leaned back, a triumphant smile on his face. 

Was the merman  _playing_  with him? 

Before he could ponder that, the merman's tail unfurled and slid between Makoto's legs. Unbidden, heat rushed to his cheeks. Makoto attempted to scramble back, only to slip and almost knock his head on the opposite side of the tub. Panicking would not help the situation – in fact, it only served to pique the merman's interest further, if the way the creature dragged himself forward was any indication. A brief finagling in the water and the merman managed to reverse their positions so he lay practically overtop of Makoto, Makoto's legs bent to accommodate the lithe body between them. 

"You shouldn't—" The protest died on Makoto's lips as webbed fingers crested over his knees. The fine hairs on his leg stood erect as the merman's interest trailed higher, and if Makoto didn't put a stop to this soon there would be serious danger of something else reacting that way too. 

He attempted to rotate his leg, but the merman caught it again. One hand gripped his foot and the other rested on his calf, and very gently the merman tested the flexibility of his leg by pushing upwards. It was almost like the warm-ups Makoto did before working out, but also – he shivered as again the merman’s blue eyes roved over him – completely different. 

He gasped as the merman blew against his skin, the cool stream of air stirring a part of him he would rather stayed dormant. "D-don't do that," he pleaded, only to be completely disregarded as the merman repeated the action. Nimble fingers raked between his sparse leg hairs, before they closed around one and yanked. With a yelp, Makoto kicked his leg in reflex, and the merman reeled back in alarm. 

Apologetically, he met the merman's narrowed blue gaze. "Sorry," he said, rubbing at the sore spot on his leg. "I told you not to..." 

A reproachful whistle was his only answer before the merman inched forward again. There was a clear moment of hesitation before he gingerly nuzzled Makoto's leg. 

"You don't have to apologize." Because he could only assume the way the merman's touch gentled meant he was sorry as well. Without a proper means of communication, however, there really was no way of knowing. 

The merman's fingers skimmed over his thighs, dragging Makoto's sopping shorts up as they went, and the merman seemed pleasantly surprised to discover that the leg continued even beneath the fabric. With little ceremony he began to pull at the material. 

Makoto winced at the sound of stitches tearing, but he allowed it, if only so as not to spook the merman again. It wasn't that he wanted to be touched, he just - for some reason, he couldn't stomach the idea of the creature withdrawing now. 

At the same time, he didn't want a pair of his favorite shorts ruined because of this, either. He squirmed a little bit, but that did nothing to stop the merman. 

"Wait, let me—you're going to rip them," he griped weakly, prying the hands away and marveling briefly at the silver hue of the merman's skin. 

The merman glared but acquiesced and stopped, if only because the sight of Makoto pulling his shirt up over his head now captured his attention. Makoto tossed the sodden T-shirt onto the bathroom floor, shivering as the cool air assaulted his skin. His chest, even while broader, was not different enough from the merman's own to interest him very long. Iridescent fingers traced the circle of his nipple before quickly moving down over his abdominal muscles. He pressed into Makoto's naval, eyebrows furrowing in silent question, but ultimately seemed most impressed by Makoto's legs and the now prominent bulge tenting his shorts.

Before the merman could act upon what the voracious look in his eyes promised, Makoto shimmied out of his shorts. For modesty's sake he wanted to leave his boxers on, but a prompting squint soon had him sliding those off too. 

"I guess we'll both be naked, then." 

The merman tipped his head to the side, eyes traveling the expanse of newly bared skin. Makoto blushed furiously at the extra attention paid to his dick, which twitched at the merman's excited trill. The merman curled his tail forward so Makoto could see the finger-length slit at its center, about where the pelvic bones would meet if the creature had legs. 

"So you're a… a girl?" Two harsh clicks dissuaded him from covering himself in embarrassment. It really shouldn't have made a difference if the creature was male or female, this was wrong either way, but knowing the merman might actually be a mer _maid_  filled him with an acute sense of shame. 

Cool fingers against his sensitive skin had him gasping. A gentle squeeze and he instinctively bucked into the touch. Makoto clenched his eyes shut, trying to conjure unpleasant images in his mind to counter the sensation of explorative fingers following the vein down the underside to his sac. 

As good as it felt – and damn, it felt good; far better than it should have – Makoto couldn't take advantage of the situation any longer. The merman – mermaid – might not have known the implications of these actions, what it meant in human terms to touch a person like this, but Makoto could not hide behind the same naïveté. He was a grown man with full recognition of the lines between dubious and consensual sexual acts. 

"This isn't right." He swore the mermaid actually whined as he struggled to distance himself from the invasive touch. "I know you're just curious, but you don't understand. This kind of thing—"

The slippery tail twined possessively about his waist, drawing him closer. Objections deserted him as quickly as they'd arose when those iridescent hands settled on him again, one leisurely stroking his cock and the other guiding one of Makoto's own hands to the tail slit. Makoto swallowed thickly as he felt warmth against his palm that did not coincide with the rest of the creature's cold body. 

Ocean-blue eyes watched him expectantly. Makoto released a slow, shuddering breath, unsure of how to proceed. It was clear he wouldn't be allowed to get up anytime soon – not until the mermaid was sated. But what was he even supposed to do? He brushed his hand tentatively over the slit, wondering if it would be like fingering a normal woman if he were to slip a finger inside. 

Sensing his insecurity, the mermaid released Makoto and instead began to rub against the slit, back arching in response. Makoto could only stare, wide-eyed, at the undulating creature. If he hadn't already been hard, the sight would have been more than arousing enough to get him there. 

When the mermaid's fingers shifted lower, Makoto caught sight of something else – an angrily flushed sliver of skin that hadn't been there before, between the parted folds of the slit. Different from his own, but familiar enough in shape for Makoto to recognize and release an abbreviated hybrid of laugh and sigh. 

"You're a boy after all." 

That's what he'd been trying to show Makoto: that they were the same, in one aspect at least. This new understanding didn't change much, hardly made the situation less bizarre, but Makoto felt less guilty as he moved his hand to cover the merman's. 

Back in high school, this kind of thing hadn't been unheard of in the sports club locker rooms. Friends would help each other out, and not a word would be spoken of the occurrence afterwards. Makoto hadn't regularly taken part in such activities – he'd been too afraid of getting caught – but couldn't deny he'd enjoyed himself on the rare instances he did. 

Makoto settled a hand over the merman's, following the circular motion over the slit. The flesh beneath his hands grew hotter and the merman tipped his head back, eyes falling shut. He took his hand away so it was only Makoto touching him now, pressing the back of his palm instead over his mouth in a very coy, human fashion. Emboldened by the reaction, Makoto shifted to straddle the tail. His own erection throbbed between his legs, begging for attention, and in an effort to relieve it he thrust against the tail, groaning. 

Blue eyes fixed on him again, narrow and calculating. Makoto took a deep breath, humiliation weighing his tongue down like lead. He ducked his head to hide his flaming cheeks. "Sorry," he said, when he found himself able to speak. "I—" 

The merman sunk back against the tub, vaulted his tail so it rubbed tantalizingly against Makoto's crotch. Makoto choked down a whimper, wanting nothing more than to snap his hips forward. Webbed hands slid to Makoto's thighs, urging him closer until their bodies were more proportionally aligned, and then repeated what he'd done before with his tail. Suggestive and stimulating, the single move was all the encouragement Makoto needed. As the merman arced up, Makoto ground his hips down, and the pace only frenzied from there. All too soon a familiar coiling tightened Makoto's insides. He panted, trying to hold out as long as possible. 

Then the merman moaned – a low, resonate, and very  _human_  sound – and the coil shattered. Makoto buried his face in the pale, silvery column of the merman's throat as he came. An irrational part of him wanted to bite down, taste the saltiness of that skin and claim the merman as his own. 

He didn't know how long he lay against the creature. His limbs felt heavy, and a pleasant, post-orgasmic haze coated his mind. Makoto sighed and wished he never had to move again. 

Fingernails raked down his back. Makoto winced, opened his eyes, and then the full gravity of the situation settled. 

_What the hell was that?_

Makoto jumped up, somehow managing not to slip. He grabbed hold of the curtain rod to steady himself and tried not to stare at the mixture of his cum and a strange silver-white fluid contaminating the bath water. He tried desperately not to think about what he'd just done, or the way the merman still gazed intensely at him. 

"So I—" He tripped over his words. From another part of the house, he heard his cell phone go off and said a silent prayer of thanks for the excuse to leave. "I don't think you're hurt anywhere. That's - that's good. Yeah." 

Before he could get one foot out of the bath, the merman grabbed hold of him by the leg once more. He was sitting straight, staring up the length of Makoto's body with an expression that might have read bored if not for the provocative gleam in those half-lidded eyes. The merman walked two fingers over Makoto's thigh, mimicry of how Makoto tried to explain finding him on the beach earlier. 

"Stay," the merman said. 

Makoto let the phone ring.


	2. Chapter 2

"I'm sorry," Makoto repeated for the third time into his cell phone.

On the other end of the line, Nagisa whined. _“No fair, now I have to walk home!”_

“I didn’t bring my car,” Makoto pointed out.

_“I was going to bat my eyelashes until you agreed to carry me.”_

Of course. He really shouldn’t have expected anything less.

 _“Where did you even disappear to? Did ya-”_ Nagisa broke off with a hiccup, followed by a short giggle. _“Did ya find a nice boy to cozy up with on the beach?”_

Makoto cast a sidelong glance at the bathroom door, and as if sensing him the merman gave a low, questioning whistle.

The sound must have carried over the phone, for Nagisa sputtered in disbelief. _“You did, didn’t you?”_ Despite the accusatory words, he sounded more curious now than upset. Unearthing details of Makoto’s love life (or pathetic lack thereof) had become a favorite pastime of his ever since they started high school and Makoto started unknowingly attracting admirers. If Makoto didn’t hurry him off the phone now, no doubt Nagisa would begin pestering for details.

“I’m really sorry, Nagisa. I’ll text someone to go pick you up.”

Before Nagisa could say anything more, Makoto hit the ‘end call’ button and sat back against the headboard. With a sigh, he texted one of the mutual friends of his and Nagisa’s he’d seen at the party who’d still looked sober enough when he left. Hopefully someone would be gracious enough to help get Nagisa back to his place safely. If not... well, Makoto supposed he could drive back to the party and pick him up, but he really didn’t want to. He couldn’t bear the idea of being anywhere else, and it wasn't like he could leave the merman alone.

A notion only reaffirmed when, after setting his phone on the nightstand, he returned to the bathroom to find the merman biting into a bar of soap from the shower rack. 

With a loud cry Makoto snatched the soap out of the merman’s hand, earning a shrill whistle of protest in response.

Trying to explain to the merman how the soap might be poisonous for him to ingest was a near impossible task that grated on even Makoto’s nerves. As it turned out, what the merman actually knew of human speech was a smattering of odd words and phrases, in various languages, that must have been picked up through years of travel while swimming close to the shore. None of that proved useful in actually maintaining a conversation. Makoto had already endeavored to gather information about where the merman came from and if there were others like him, and in the end succeeded in little else but frustrating both of them.

A short battle of tug-of-war resulted from Makoto’s attempt at chastising, the merman clapping his small jaws all the while, and ended with Makoto’s fresh shirt drenched in water but the soap at least tossed into the sink a safe distance away from the merman’s prying fingers. 

“Stay,” Makoto said, after removing his shirt and tossing it into the hamper. This was one word he knew the merman understood, but even still he thrust his upright palm in the creature’s direction to drive the point home. Blue eyes darted to the sink and narrowed as if weighing the chances of reaching it. Makoto repeated with a bit more force, “ _stay_ ,” feeling very much as if he were attempting to train a particularly destructive and headstrong dog, and then backed out of the bathroom slowly. 

For a moment he waited just on the other side of the door for any telltale splashing. A few hesitant clicks shadowed Makoto’s departure, followed by a word in a language Makoto did not know, but nothing else. Satisfied his bathroom wouldn’t be completely destroyed in his absence, Makoto continued down the short hallway to the kitchen. 

What to cook a merman for breakfast? 

He rifled through the several days’ worth of leftovers, wrinkling his nose as he sniffed some of the Tupperware’s contents. When his fridge revealed nothing suitable he moved on to the freezer, where he found several cuts of chicken and a fish filet. He set the filet in a bowl of hot water to thaw, but in the meantime he knew he had to produce something else. If the merman was hungry enough to chomp down on a bar of soap that had to smell nothing like food, Makoto couldn’t leave him waiting another few hours on frozen fish. 

The solution came from the cupboard, in the form of canned tuna. Makoto wondered briefly if the merman would like it, seeing as the creature was most likely accustomed to eating his food raw – which led to worry over whether or not mermaids were even carnivores. 

_What if he only eats plants? I guess I could go scoop seaweed from the beach..._

With two cans opened and drained, Makoto returned to the bathroom. Right as he walked in the merman’s attention snapped to him, concentrating on the movements of his legs, as usual. Even with their little exploration of each other’s anatomy a fresh memory which tinged Makoto’s cheeks pink, the merman was endlessly curious about how Makoto’s legs worked, constantly watching them move and touching them whenever Makoto came close enough. 

Makoto sat down heavily on the toilet and passed the merman the first can of tuna. “This should taste better for you.”

The merman took the can uncertainly, turning it this way and that to inspect before raising it to his nose for a delicate sniff. The scent obviously appealed to him, for soon the bathroom was filled with pleased whistles as the merman shoved little handfuls of tuna into his mouth.

Makoto laughed softly. “You like it? Good. For a while I wasn’t sure you’d eat it.” 

A pink tongue darted out to lick around the rim of the can. Makoto tried not to track its progress, but in the end he couldn’t help himself. He justified his interest as only natural – scientific, even – given what they’d done in this very bathtub mere hours ago. The memory of the merman’s hands on him, so cold and yet capable of blazing a trail of fire in their wake as they roamed Makoto’s body, sent tingles down his spine. He shifted, toes curling against the tile and immediately capturing the merman’s attention. 

Holding on to the can of tuna with one hand, the merman reached out with the other to grab Makoto’s big toe. He met Makoto’s eyes enquiringly and Makoto gave an easy smile.

“Toes,” he said, and wriggled his toes for emphasis. 

Blue eyes sparkled in delight, and the merman carefully fitted the tip of a webbed finger between each toe. “Toes,” he repeated in his low, musical voice. He moved his hand over Makoto’s foot to the bump of his ankle, then up a little higher. “Lllegs.” 

When those eyes locked on his for confirmation, Makoto nodded. A corner of the merman’s mouth lifted in a proud little grin, and then he went back to chewing his tuna. After sufficiently licking the first can clean, he tossed it carelessly away from himself.

Makoto heaved a sigh and watched the can spin across the bathroom floor. After passing the second can into the merman’s waiting hands, he went over and picked the discarded one up. Quickly he rinsed it out so it wouldn’t stink, and deposited it properly in the wastebasket beside the toilet. 

Luckily for him it was the weekend and, aside from some preliminary research he’d already begun for his invertebrate zoology class, rather light on homework, giving him plenty of time to mull over his options regarding the merman. 

Scientific and personal interests aside, in his heart Makoto knew the right course of action would be to bring the merman back to where he’d found him. However much he didn’t want to part with his discovery, he couldn’t permanently house the creature in his bathtub. Between work and school schedules it just wasn’t feasible; he wouldn’t have time to properly care for him. Not to mention animal rights organizations would hang a price on his head if word of the merman’s existence ever leaked.

Unfortunate though it was, the merman had to go – and sooner rather than later. Makoto knew better than to attempt the move in broad daylight, though, which gave him at least the rest of the day with the creature. He fully intended to take advantage of the precious hours he had left, and absorb every ounce of information the merman was willing to part with. 

_And maybe..._

Makoto hastily derailed that train of thought before it progressed any further, averting his gaze from where it had settled on the merman’s tail. Now that he knew if its existence, the camouflaged slit in the tail drew his focus far more often than was decent. Makoto pressed a hand to his face to hide his embarrassed flush. The merman was lapping at his meal quite leisurely this time around; scooping out bits with his tongue in a way that reminded Makoto of the dainty bites a cat takes.

Warmth spread down Makoto’s neck and chest, making him wish he still had his shirt on to hide it because at that moment the merman chose to look at him, locking his blue eyes on Makoto as his tongue curled invitingly into his mouth. 

“Makoto!” Makoto blurted, just for the need to say something. The merman tilted his head to the side and Makoto stammered and backtracked and tried to remember where he’d intended for his outburst to go. “M-my name, I mean.” He pointed to himself. “Makoto Tachibana.” 

The merman lifted a hand and pointed at Makoto, then raised his eyes for guidance. It was kind of cute; the merman’s own drive to learn about Makoto. Most often he mimicked Makoto’s movements, the sounds he made. Makoto hoped he’d do the same now.

“Makoto,” he said again. 

The merman pursed his lips, and then tried the name on his own.

Makoto wondered what it took for the merman to switch to human from his natural speech. Did the sounds come from different areas in the merman’s throat, or was it all the same? 

“Maa... Maa-kooe?”

Makoto chuckled softly. Blue eyes sharpened into a glare. “Sorry!” It was just too adorable, watching the merman struggle to get his name out. “It’s a bit more difficult because it’s two syllables. Try it again. I won’t laugh, I promise! Makoto.” 

The merman turned his face to the side, pouting, and for a moment Makoto feared he’d really offended him. Then those supple lips parted. “Maa-kooh-toh,” the merman worked his way slowly through the name. 

Makoto’s heart skipped a beat. 

“Ma-koto,” the merman said again. “Makoto.” 

“That’s great,” Makoto breathed. By now even the tips of his ears were red. He didn’t think he’d ever been so thrilled to hear his own name – except for maybe the day the twins first pronounced it correctly, but that was totally different. That hadn’t stuttered his heartbeat so severely, or spread a fierce ray of warmth to his groin the way his name in on the merman’s lips did. “Do... you have a name?” he asked, when he found he could speak again.    

Another bout of silence filled the room, during which Makoto’s shoulders slumped a bit. 

He instantly noted the difference when the merman whistled at him next. The sound started out high, then dropped to a lower pitch and ended with a firm click. He repeated himself a few times, until Makoto understood the significance of the sound. In his marine mammals seminar he remembered learning dolphins did something similar, created a unique whistle that differentiated them from the rest of the pod. Names, in a sense.  

It was a musical arrangement of notes, pleasing to the ears, but nothing that Makoto could hope to replicate. “What can I call you?”

He wondered if the merman would understand why Makoto couldn’t call him by his identification sound. Their species’ concept of names, while theoretically the same, was profoundly different. Maybe he could come up with his own name for the merman? Even if the creature didn’t understand it, it would at least be better than Makoto constantly referring to him as ‘the merman’ in his mind. 

The merman seemed to contemplate his words. Blue eyes traveled over the room as he brought a hand to his chin. He repeated his unique whistle twice; the first time it sounded as it should – the transitioning high to low notes followed by the single sharp _click_ – but as he repeated it his voice took on a more definite human quality. “Haa-rooka.” 

Stunned by the familiar syllables, Makoto grinned excitedly. “Haruka?” 

The merman nodded decisively. “Haruka.” 

Learning the name only brought about only more questions: what did it mean; did it even have a meaning; if they had names, did they have an entirely spoken language of their own?

For the moment, he decided he’d have to be satisfied with the little he did know. Makoto liked the name; it suited the merman, who was so delicate despite being male. 

Therein Makoto realized his mistake – that putting a name to the creature made things worse, not better. Because he was no longer a discovery made on the beach, something Makoto could return just as easily as he’d found it. A bond was created through naming something, and Makoto had been hesitant enough to let go of the merman before he ever became Haruka. Bringing him back now would be so much harder. 

But Makoto couldn’t take it back – and even if he could, he didn’t think he’d want to. 

“Well, Haruka,” Makoto said, kneeling beside the tub. “It’s a pleasure to properly meet you.”

Haruka clicked as Makoto held a hand out in greeting, the custom obviously lost on him. When Makoto shook his hand, Haruka squeezed his fingers with far more force than necessary. “Legs,” he said. 

Hunger sated for the moment, Haruka’s incessant mind had returned to the original great wonder the human world presented, and Makoto couldn’t smother his laughter fast enough. He didn’t know if he was quite up for a repeat of what happened earlier, though – not yet, at least; he needed time to assess his feelings on the situation first. 

So, unwilling to let Haruka go to town on his legs again, Makoto set out to distract the merman with some other new vocabulary. 

First he picked up a fluffy green-and-white towel from the nearest rack. “Towel,” he said. He wrapped it around his shoulders and mimicked drying his hair. When he passed it over to Haruka, the merman took it carefully, bringing it up to his face. “You use it to dry off when you’re wet. And… uh…”

His voice trailed off as Haruka proceeded to wrap the towel around his entire head, obscuring his face from view. Quickly Makoto untied it, ignoring Makoto’s whistles of protest as he wrestled the towel away.

He supposed a merman wouldn’t have need of a towel. Then again, everything in the bathroom was a luxury a water-inhabiting species had no use for. Still, Makoto neatly folded and returned the towel to its original place, nibbling on his bottom lip as he wondered what else he could introduce Haruka to. Something Haruka could actually pass time with.

Living day-to-day in the same house, using the same appliances without second thought, nothing in the sparse bathroom sparked interest; but once Makoto took the time to see the room from Haruka’s perspective, things ordinarily lost in the periphery of the day suddenly jumped out at him. 

He grabbed his toothbrush from the glass cup by the sink and waved it in Haruka’s direction. “This is a toothbrush,” he explained, and offered it to Haruka. He always kept a spare in the medicine cabinet, so Haruka could do as he pleased with this one so long as he didn’t try shoving it down his throat or something. 

Haruka rotated the toothbrush over and over in his hands, tilting his head to the side as he studied it from all angles. One silvery finger traced lightly over the bristles and his eyes widened as if struck by realization. A higher-pitched exclamation preceded a jumble of humanistic sounds in a language Makoto did not recognize as, with new vigor, Haruka raised the toothbrush and started to run it over his hair. 

Makoto nearly choked on his spit, on his feet in an instant. Haruka turned quizzical eyes on him and Makoto couldn’t help himself. Laughter bubbled up in his throat, because it was just too funny – this hybrid creature whom from the waist up appeared to be a fully grown man, grooming his hair with a toothbrush, of all things, and seeming damned near elated about it. 

Still giggling, Makoto opened the top drawer of the vanity and pulled out a normal fine-toothed comb. “I think you mean this. A comb.” 

Haruka glanced between the toothbrush and the comb, and then held out the toothbrush to trade.

Makoto gently urged his hand away, taking a moment to observe the frayed, semitransparent lavender fin attached near the merman’s elbow, which he could only guess served a similar purpose to a fish’s pectoral fin. Then he sat down on the lip of the tub and brought the comb to Haruka’s hair, beginning to brush through the silky black strands. 

Haruka stilled, his brow furrowed contemplatively. He brought a hand to cover the top of his head and Makoto immediately withdrew the comb. Haruka tilted his head back, locked eyes with Makoto, who wondered if he’d overstepped some kind of boundary and tried not to blush under the intense, unblinking gaze.

When a minute passed and Haruka cautiously lowered his hand back down to the tub, Makoto picked up where he left off. Haruka made no effort to stop him and so Makoto combed the merman’s hair in silence, untangling the few knots he happened across, and all the while Haruka’s body sunk further and further into the tepid water, relaxation slowly weighing on his eyelids.

By the time Makoto finished, the merman’s eyes were closed and his lips parted as he released soft, encouraging little sounds from the back of his throat. 

Makoto set the comb aside, suddenly tired himself. It had to be going on twenty-four hours now since he’d had last slept, the events of the previous night preventing him from leaving the bathroom for more than a few minutes at a time. Haruka was rather docile when not mindlessly driven by his curiosity, so Makoto probably could have caught a nap in his bed at some point – done so now, even, while the merman appeared to sleep – but doubt gnawed at his insides. He was afraid of what he would find if he left for too long – terrified of walking into the bathroom and discovering it empty, Haruka nothing more than the dream Makoto first believed him to be when he found him on the beach. 

Gently he traced the operculum marring Haruka’s sides like thin gashes, watching the flaps sway as his hands disturbed the shallow water. The water could probably use changing again. He’d refilled the tub three times over already, first when it had felt too cool to the touch, then when he noticed a buildup of Haruka’s scales along the surface, and the third time after Haruka swished his lunate tail to dispense a peculiar teal liquid that had gathered beneath it. 

His eyes wandered to the places his hands could not reach, over the rounded, pearlescent scales on the merman’s curved tail, to the frayed base fins and then back up to the hidden slit between small twin pelvic fins. The desire to touch intensified, bringing heat to Makoto’s skin and making him swallow thickly. 

Even with all the merman’s eccentricities, something about him appealed to Makoto in a highly unnatural way. Their kinds were not meant to coexist, largely why Haruka’s species maintained only as fiction in Makoto’s world; but for some reason fate brought them together, and the only thought in Makoto’s mind now was that he did not want to let Haruka go. Makoto was not the sort of person prone to selfishness, but all he wanted was to wrap his arms around Haruka and revel in the cool press of his body forever. 

“Do you believe in love at first sight?” Makoto smiled wryly at the answering silence. He didn’t know if Haruka was awake or not – he hadn’t moved in a while, or made any kind of sound to alert Makoto of his consciousness – but he doubted the merman would understand him anyways. Did his kind fall in love, or did they simply mate out of a desire to feel pleasure? Makoto didn’t think they did so only to procreate; otherwise, Haruka wouldn’t have wanted to touch him so intimately before. “It’s silly, I know. Nagisa would say I read too many romance novels.” 

The oldest legends about mermaids warned of enchanting voices and creatures of ethereal beauty that tempted sailors to their deaths. They captivated and drowned their victims, and the idea that he might just willingly be following Haruka to his own watery grave sent chills down his spine.

Then a hand cupped his cheek, cool and comforting, and Haruka brought their faces closer together so that their foreheads touched. He whistled softly, two low notes full of longing. “ _Nulma_.”

The word echoed off the bathroom walls, but Haruka hadn’t opened his mouth to say it. His blue eyes bore into Makoto’s and, yes, this must be how those ill-fated sailors felt moments before they were dragged under the waves: petrified but helpless, unwilling to free themselves even if they could. 

Makoto carefully covered Haruka’s hand in his own, adoring the little smile that pulled at Haruka’s lips. He wanted to kiss him, wanted to slide into the tub with him and merge them a whole new species the world had never seen before, would never see again.

He wanted Haruka.

“It means love, doesn’t it?” 

Interesting, how Haruka could make those faint clicking noises even as he pressed his lips to Makoto’s. This only distracted him for a moment, about until Haruka pried Makoto’s mouth open and began to suck on his tongue. 

Makoto wasn’t new to kissing; he’d had a girlfriend in high school, and during his first semester of university he’d experimented for the first time with a guy. But none of that experience compared to kissing Haruka. There was nothing gentle about it – no teasing nibbling on his bottom lip, or intimate twining of their tongues. Haruka kissed him as if staking a claim: mapping out every square inch of Makoto’s mouth, biting with those little teeth sharp enough to draw blood. When Makoto pulled away for air, Haruka purposely cut his own bottom lip, licked it up, and then leaned back in to paint Makoto’s tongue red.

Tasting copper, Makoto instinctively jerked back. 

“ _Llo ffha_.” Again the voice resonated without Haruka even having to open his mouth. Makoto gawked, shock rendering him speechless. Haruka’s eyes were passionately bright. Both of his hands settled on Makoto’s face, one on each side, and he kissed Makoto again. “ _Makoto bi llo ffha_.” 

His body felt heavy, lethargic in a way he’d never experienced before. It was as if there were chains around his limbs, dragging him down to some abyss. He couldn’t fight back, and all the while Haruka’s mouth devoured him. 

Thoughts of the sailors damned by the siren’s call stalked him like silent predators as his eyelids drooped and he slipped into unconsciousness.

* * * *

Makoto dreamed of facing turbulent seas from the helm of a majestic wooden ship. Mightily though she was built, a manmade vessel was no match against Neptune’s wrath, and soon she crumbled to forces far beyond her control. Makoto was sent crashing into the waves amongst the wreckage, and could do little else but watch the distorted orb of the moon grow more and more distant as he sank. Some part of him thought he should be afraid, but another voice, soothing and low, drowned his worry.

 _Follow me_ , the voice sang. Piercing blue eyes beckoned him from the depths. The last air escaped his lungs in a rush of bubbles. _Follow me_.

*** * * ***

A strange smell filled the duplex. 

Makoto hadn’t noticed it at first, still couldn’t pinpoint when exactly he’d caught the first whiff, but now the sweet, heady scent permeated all nine-hundred square feet, from the narrow entryway to his bedroom. It took him a little while, after making sure the windows were all closed and he hadn’t left any food out, to distinguish Haruka as the source of the smell. 

After his fretful nap on the bathroom floor, Makoto had again tried to distance himself. He knew it was wrong, awful of him to get so worked up over a nightmare to a point where he ignored the creature he’d brought under his own roof, but he couldn’t face Haruka yet. Each despondent whistle and call of his name stabbed at his heart, but Makoto distracted himself with tidying the house. After a while, the noises stopped. 

Even as he willed himself past the bathroom without taking more than a cursory peek inside, Makoto couldn’t ignore the desire that wormed inside of him, relentless. In the back of his mind he heard the seductive voice from his dream calling out to him.

How much longer could he resist it – resist Haruka? 

The sun had just begun to dip beyond the horizon when Makoto returned to the bathroom with the now-thawed filet of whitefish. Haruka lounged in tub facing the opposite direction than before, in the middle of some bizarre grooming ritual that involved finger-combing his hair and then sliding his hands down over his arms or stomach. It didn’t make sense to Makoto until he got a bit closer – the musky fragrance assaulting his senses and stirring an unexpected response in his body – and noticed the oily coating on Haruka’s webbed fingers. 

Makoto itched for a closer look, but forced himself to merely watch the mermaid equivalent of moisturizing. Again Haruka combed through his hair, silvery hands coming away shiny with oil from the glands hidden beneath the thick black locks, and then rubbed the oil into his skin. The more he did it the heavier the scent in the air became, and the hotter Makoto felt; though he’d yet to make that connection in his mind. 

Clearing his throat, Makoto held the plate out. “Haruka, I brought you food.”

Haruka paused for just a brief moment, and then went right back to what he was doing, snubbing the meal. Makoto wondered if it was payback for the way he’d avoided the bathroom for most the afternoon. Did mermen hold grudges?

“I guess I’ll leave it here...” 

Haruka dutifully ignored the plate Makoto set down within reaching distance. Straightening to his full height, Makoto awkwardly scratched the back of his neck. 

Once Haruka finished coating his torso, his tail received the same attention. All the while he snuck coy glances in Makoto’s direction, until finally Makoto was forced to question the timing. Haruka had gone all day without doing this, so why now? Was it supposed to signify something? And what about the smell? Makoto didn’t think it was coming from the merman’s self-produced oils, but – well, what else could it be?

“In a few hours I’ll... bring you back to the- the beach.” Makoto cursed the stutter in his voice. He didn’t know how he’d gotten so turned on, so quickly. There was nothing particularly erotic about Haruka’s actions. The way he kept looking at Makoto could be called flirtatious, he supposed, but still... That was no excuse for the embarrassing tent in his pants.   

If he had any sense at all, he would turn around and run. Flee the bathroom and distract himself somehow until it was time to return Haruka to the beach. Already he knew, though, that there would be no point in trying. He had a strange, intuitive sense that wasn’t what Haruka wanted, and an even stranger need to do whatever it took to please Haruka. 

_Why do I need to?_

Haruka’s silver hands continued to work oil into the scales of his tail, just below the slit. Makoto’s own hands gravitated toward the front of his pants. An encouraging series of clicks resounded as Makoto unclasped the button and tugged the zipper down, his cheeks flaring. “This is you, isn’t it?” His breath hitched as he shoved his hand passed the elastic of his boxers to grip the hardening flesh concealed beneath. “You’re-you’re doing something.” 

Haruka tipped his head back against the rim of the tub, a secretive grin curling his lips slightly upward. He moved his hands away from his tail and spread his arms in an invitation Makoto didn’t need long to accept. His body moved as if of it’s own accord, stepping out of his pants and practically tumbling headfirst into the tub for the chance to kiss Haruka again. The phantom press of the merman’s lips had lingered the entire afternoon, and Makoto yearned for its biting force again. 

The cool slide of Haruka’s tail between his legs was a much welcome intrusion. Makoto parted his legs, dipped to press his forehead against Haruka’s neck. He could smell the oil on Haruka’s skin and it was intoxicating. On impulse he licked over the curve of Haruka’s shoulder, and the answering noise from the merman made his cock twitch. 

If Haruka were a regular human boy, or even just human at all, Makoto had no doubt about how things would progress. Makoto would lay him down and kiss every inch of the lithe body he could get a hold of, and only when Haruka was trembling and just on the verge of begging would Makoto finally sink into him. But Haruka wasn’t ordinary and he wasn’t human – it was debatable whether Makoto would even want him so badly if he was (though he had a feeling he wouldn’t be able to resist no matter what form Haruka took) – and so Makoto was thoroughly at a loss for how to proceed. 

He knew what he wanted to do, and that was to explore in far greater detail than he’d tentatively done earlier. Haruka’s body was a secret wonderland of discovery, untouched, as far as Makoto awareness extended, by any other human. The sole pioneer of a new world, Makoto was eager to map out each dip and valley, trace the contours with his tongue and nip at every angle; and as much as he saw, he did not think he could ever, ever get enough.

Curling an arm around Haruka’s waist, Makoto hoisted him closer. His arm slipped against the lubricated skin, but he held tight while his other hand skirted down over Haruka’s gills. Haruka’s chest expanded as he inhaled sharply, gills fluttering with the movement. Makoto wondered how they worked. The way Haruka’s chest rose and fell made it seem as if he breathed through a normal set of lungs, but the gills threw a very problematic wrench in that theory. 

He supposed he would never have an answer, unless someone else happened upon this same discovery. As far as Makoto was concerned, the functions of Haruka’s body could remain a mystery; he had no intention of turning the merman over to any scientific authority. 

Bringing his hand back up, he cupped Haruka’s cheek and gently tilted his head back to give himself access to the soft underside of his throat, where he suctioned a kiss. Haruka vaulted his tail, brow furrowed in frustration. His hands rested at Makoto’s thighs, idly trailing up and down and sending pleasant shivers down Makoto’s spine. His legs still ranked as the merman’s favorite feature, just as Makoto couldn’t get over the unfathomable tail rubbing adamantly against his erection.

Something that was not Haruka’s hand brushed the sensitive inside of his thigh. Makoto pulled back from the delectable column of Haruka’s throat to stare down their bodies. Haruka squirmed beneath him, and Makoto caught sight of the odd, pinkish flesh poking out from the tail slit. 

Haruka gave a low, yearning whistle, eyes falling shut as he pressed his tail up so they were intimately flushed against each other.

Makoto stiffened, a gasp tearing from his lips. “I don’t know what to do,” he said in an unintelligible rush. Haruka’s eyes cracked open to consider him, and Makoto shuddered at how lust had clouded them to the near black of the ocean’s depths. “I want to fuck you,” he admitted, and then ducked his head. The shame of his deep-rooted passion fueled the already hot blush on his cheeks. “But I don’t know how.” 

A moment passed in silence, and then Haruka reached down and took hold of himself. Makoto sat back and watched. Haruka took his time, seeming to have a plan but not in any rush to see it realized. 

It took great effort not to touch. Makoto inhaled slowly and bit the inside of his cheek. His cock throbbed against his stomach. Haruka noticed all of this and admonishingly clucked his tongue against the roof of his mouth, eyes sensually half-lidded. “Ma-ko-to,” he whispered, arching and giving a light squeeze that Makoto swore he could feel through his own body. 

With a needy moan, Makoto tried to grasp Haruka’s wrist. Haruka only batted him away and continued to pleasure himself. “Let me,” Makoto insisted, but Haruka’s one-track mind successfully tuned him out.

And very soon, Makoto saw why. 

Under Haruka’s careful attention, the fevered skin flourished and bloomed like the petals of an exquisite flower. He’d never seen anything like it before; another mystery about this strange creature that awakened a possessive side of o Makoto that he never knew existed.

Rather than flooded by torrent of new questions, somehow he knew what it meant; a part of an instinct that should not belong to him seized Makoto, and the next step became clear to him. Haruka did not resist when Makoto took his hand and reverently kissed the inside of the palm. Leaning forward, he pressed their lips together, a thorough distraction as he slid himself around so he was on top. 

“Makoto _bi llo ffha_ ,” came the sensual whisper of his voice again, from somewhere other than his occupied mouth. Perhaps just in Makoto’s mind, a memory to make his toes curl as a tight heat enveloped him from root to tip. Haruka impaled himself on Makoto without batting an eyelash, accepting him with a fluid ease that made Makoto believe they were always meant to become one. 

Makoto gasped, hips jerking impulsively into the welcoming, wet heat. “Haruka—” 

Haruka’s tail wormed underneath his legs, twining around him, and sucked Makoto into him deeper still. With a groan Makoto snapped his hips forward, reaching up to grip Haruka’s shoulder. 

Damn, this was difficult in the bath. If Haruka had legs – or even if he’d remained underneath Makoto – that would have been different. As it was, Makoto scrambled for purchase on the bath’s slippery rim. Haruka’s eyes twinkled as he watched the struggle. Never one to give up easily, Makoto managed to hook a leg around the merman, giving him decent enough leverage to establish a steady rhythm once he’d also gotten a sure grip on the tub. 

It was so much better than what they’d done before. Not that that hadn’t been amazing as well; this was just on an entirely new level. Makoto didn’t think he could have sex as an ordinary human being again. Nothing would be able to compare to the incredible tightness, the way Haruka’s body ate him up and demanded more, squeezing around Makoto and inviting him deeper. No woman’s lips could leave such a blazing trail of kisses down his chest; no man could make him jump at every playful or controlling hint of teeth. Nothing would ever compare to Haruka. 

 _I want you forever_ , said each fervent grind of Makoto’s hips. 

 _Then have me_ , Haruka’s eyes answered. He laved at Makoto’s chest with his tongue and then latched on just over his heart, teeth biting gently into the skin. 

Makoto cried out, heart skipping a beat as a jolt of pleasure rocketed straight to his groin. Without a second thought he reversed their positions, pounding into Haruka with renewed vigor. Water sloshed over the rim of the tub, flooding the bathroom floor, but that didn’t matter when Haruka’s tail curled around him, when Haruka’s silvery fingers raked down his back, when Haruka’s mouth finally detached from him and left a neat little imprint of teeth behind.

Makoto didn’t last much longer. The sweet smell in the air had only grown heavier, clouding his mind, but what really pushed him over the edge was the way Haruka’s inner walls began to pulsate around him. Almost like a woman reaching her orgasm, but at the same time completely different, because inside of Haruka Makoto felt a light caress against his length, followed by two more. Three feather-soft, thread-like appendages clung to him, vibrating with each pulse that rocked Haruka’s body. 

Two... three... four shallow thrusts, and Makoto shuddered, burying himself to the hilt and spilling into Haruka. He clung weakly to the merman as Haruka milked his orgasm. When the three little stems finally released him, Makoto collapsed, thoroughly drained. Haruka did not protest his weight, instead wrapped his arms loosely around his middle, clicking affectionately. 

As with the last time they’d been physically intimate, Makoto felt a cloying insecurity in the pit of his stomach. He did not regret what he’d done – this closeness with Haruka was something he would carry with him for the rest of his life. But that changed very little. As soon as the streets were deserted Makoto would have to return Haruka to the beach. Despite the yearning to stay by Haruka’s side, intensified tenfold by their coupling, the fact remained they would probably never see each other again after this night. Once Haruka disappeared beneath the waves, God knew where the ocean would take him. 

_Is there any way I...?_

The question dissipated even before it could fully formulate in Makoto’s mind, unraveled by the sorrowful flutter of Haruka’s lashes. Where Haruka went, Makoto could not follow. Such a feat was impossible for man, and even were it not Makoto did not know if he could relinquish his whole life on land. Iwatobi was his home, where his family and friends lived; he had a life he could not so easily abandon. Makoto would have to remain content with only the memory.

Even as he held Haruka in his arms, the merman’s head tucked under his chin, he knew it would not be enough. Haruka had drawn him in, drowned his hope for any sort of a normal life, and now Makoto did not know how he could possibly hope to exist without him. 

Haruka’s lunate tail fin swayed over the edge of the tub, the slow back-and-forth motion reflecting the despondency in both their hearts. Makoto fought the sting of tears in his eyes. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered when a cool hand ghosted under his eye. Haruka stared at the tears slipping down his cheeks with muted surprise. “I shouldn’t be crying.” Haruka had given him something special, let him glimpse into a world most humans could never hope to see in their lifetimes. He should feel honored, humbled - and he did, he was extremely grateful, but a cavernous sorrow outweighed all other emotion. “I’m happy – I really am – but I... I hate that I’ll never see you again. I really hate it.” He scrubbed his eyes forcefully with the back of his palms. 

Haruka brought their faces closer together so their noses touched. His eyes bore into Makoto’s, but Makoto was too distraught to read whatever message the merman tried to impress upon him. With a huff, Haruka took Makoto’s wrist and brought his hand to rest at the center of that shallow chest. Beneath his fingertips Makoto could feel a steady beat. 

“Makoto,” Haruka murmured softly. Makoto pulled in a shuddering breath. Haruka then placed his free hand on the mark he’d left on Makoto’s chest over his heart. “Haruka.” 

It wasn’t a definite promise that what they’d shared could last, but Makoto would take it. He kindled that small hope like a newly birthed flame, letting it warm and soothe him. 

For now, it would have to be enough. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There were a lot of questions I had to ask myself while writing. I've tried to explain my thought process as best as I could, but if there is something I've missed feel free to ask!
> 
> 1.) WTF is Haruka's junk?
> 
> Ok. I spent way too much time coming up with this. I was inspired a bit by a fantasy novel called 'Enchantments of Flesh and Spirit', which describes the genitals of its hermaphroditic race as being 'colorful' and 'flower-like', and able to simultaneously be both male and female.
> 
> In chapter one, Makoto encountered the 'male' shape, which is similar enough to a normal human penis, whereas in this story Haruka shows him the female shape, in which the shaft 'blossoms' into something more like a vagina. The little appendages Makoto felt when Haruka orgasmed I imagined to be something like the style of a flower, with a stigma at the top which (instead of pollen) attracts the male's ejaculate. It also holds the sperm it attracts until it can be used to fertilize an egg.
> 
> Long story short! Mer!Haruka is a hermaphrodite, able to change his bits from male to female at will, depending on who he's coupling with. For simplicity's sake (and because Makoto obviously doesn't know diddly about mermaids) we're just going to refer to him as a 'he' (he prefers being in his male form anyways).
> 
> In this world, I've imagined hermaphroditic mer are very rare and prized among their species. They are typically the leaders of their pod, the alpha (so to speak) that the males and females of the group all mate with. While a male and female mer can also mate and have children, it's more desirable to procreate with the third gender because they are typically healthier and more likely to carry a baby to term.
> 
> I don't freaking know, people. This is the best I could come up with and I probably really fudged up mermaid folklore in the process, but the idea I read about that mer have a 'third' gender really appealed to me so I ran with it best I could.
> 
> 2.) …So WTF was up with that weird smell and the oil?
> 
> Another idea I found that I loved was mer moisturizing using oil produced from glands on their hidden by their hair. They run their hands through their hair, gather the oil, and rub it into their skin and tails. In this universe, female (or hermaphroditic) mer do this only when they wish to attract a mate, as the oil is very pungent and stimulates arousal in males.
> 
> So basically Haruka was sick of Makoto ignoring him all afternoon as he already felt rather possessive of his human, and figured this would be the best way to get Makoto to come back to him. Haruka gets what he wants.
> 
> 3.) So how does Haruka speak and how much does he actually understand of what Makoto is saying?
> 
> Haruka knows odd phrases and words from human languages and what they mean, but just like in canon he is far more intuitive than he seems. He picks up on things very quickly, and while he may not know exactly what Makoto is saying he gets the basis, most of the time.
> 
>  
> 
> Most of the time in the ocean, the mer communicate through whistles and clicks as most sea mammals do; these sounds carry better through the water, and so it is logical they use this method most often. Plus it requires less work, and we all know Haruka is about taking it easy.
> 
> However, in moments of intimacy, there is an ancient spoken mer language. It does not consist of many words, though. As they are sharing an intimate moment, Haruka slips into this second language – also probably because he does not know the human equivalent to these words.
> 
> \- - - - -
> 
> Wow I actually created a language. I gave this fic way too much thought. Here's the translations:
> 
> Nulma - love  
> bi - am/is/are  
> llo faa - mine/belonging to me  
> Makoto bi llo faa - Makoto is mine


	3. Chapter 3

When he was young, very young, he’d been terrified of the ocean. It seemed a silly fear for someone born and raised on an island, but nonetheless it claimed him, cast him as the lookout who remained on the shore or the pier when all of his friends went playing in the water on the beach and kept him awake at night with visions of those same friends floating lifelessly on their stomachs. 

 _There’s something in the water,_ he used to say _,_ whenever someone asked him why. Despite how often he’d tried and how many people he attempted to convey this to, he could never give a name to what that something might be, only chillingly swore he felt its presence whenever he came too close to shore. People called him paranoid, and over time he’d come to accept that must’ve been the case. He still only appreciated the ocean from a safe distance but he kept those worries he couldn’t explain to himself. 

Now he had a clearer image, though he couldn’t say he was afraid of the discovery he’d made. There were things about it that frightened him, surely; things that he would never get explanations for to rationalize in his mind – but Haruka did not scare him, and so perhaps this would be the first step in Makoto truly conquering his lifelong fear.  

In the dead of night, he crept through the deserted streets with the merman in his arms. A wet bed sheet wrapped around the slender hips barely concealed the tail and frilled fins. He took a moment to gather his nerves before he waded into the shallow water, disregarding the gooseflesh raising on his arms, and lowered Haruka into the waves. Slowly he unwound the sheet, and the merman gave an experimental flick of his tail.  

Watching him swim was an almost cathartic experience. Haruka moved with such ease, as if he were truly one with the water. Each swish of his tail overflowed with grace, the water parting happily under the crest of his arms. He dipped below the waves and surfaced again while barely making a sound. The ocean accepted him wholeheartedly, bending to his will. When there was a splash, it was of Haruka’s own design: a jump from the water, or a gentle spray as Haruka shook his hair out.  

“You’re home now,” Makoto said, smiling, and for the first time Haruka looked back at him. 

He swam over to Makoto, sliding his tail through the gap in Makoto’s legs. A friendly whistle accompanied the hand he held out in invitation. His blue eyes shone with great intelligence and secrets of a world Makoto still could hardly fathom. He wondered how old Haruka was.  

“I can’t go with you.” They both knew it. If Makoto had any sense he would leave now. Staying any longer would only invite more pain, and this was hard enough as it was. Haruka was home among the waves, and Makoto had always known that this was where they would part. Where he’d made his discovery so too must he let it go. 

Haruka tilted his head to the side, and wet bangs fell into his eyes. He grabbed Makoto’s hand and pulled gently. Makoto shook his head. The merman tugged again, a little harder this time. “Swim,” he urged.  

It still thrilled to hear him speak, but what Haruka requested Makoto could not give him. He started to back away. “Oh, no.” He freed his hand from the merman’s, but Haruka just grabbed the hem of his shirt instead. “I don’t swim. I don’t know how.” His fear of the water claimed him at a very young age, making swimming lessons as a child impossible. As a result, he’d never learned.  

The merman huffed. Before Makoto could say anything more he dove back under the waves, and when several minutes ticked by and he didn’t resurface, Makoto assumed he’d left. For some reason, the idea made his heart throb. Though really, what did he expect? They weren’t the same. Despite what happened in the bath, Haruka did not share Makoto’s sentimentality. It wasn’t as if Makoto had really nursed him back to health or anything. Haruka owed him nothing. 

Still, it hurt.  

The way Haruka had kissed him – how he’d opened himself up for Makoto, letting Makoto see a part he didn’t think any other human ever had the privilege to – and afterwards, how they’d lain together with their hands on each other’s hearts... Perhaps Makoto was just a romantic idiot, but he’d thought it meant something. 

Heaving a sigh, Makoto turned to trudge back to the shore.  

Something grabbed his ankle.  

Makoto yelped, arms flailing as he crashed into the shallow water. His heart continued to race even as a familiar dark head poked out from the waves. Haruka swam up between his legs, arms going to rest on either side of Makoto’s waist. “H-Haruka...” He tried to laugh it off, because the twinkle in Haruka’s blue eyes was nothing more than playful, but found himself still a bit too shaken up to do so. 

Haruka pushed his nose against Makoto’s knee, nuzzling gently before nipping at the skin. That did earn a smile. Makoto reached out for him and Haruka eased himself closer to fit in the opening provided by his arms. Makoto soaked in every small detail of his perfect discovery. He combed his fingers through Haruka’s hair - leaving small kisses at his nape - and traced down Haruka’s arms to squeeze his curious webbed fingers. Every so often Haruka’s tail broke the water’s surface in a leisurely swish, as they basked in the feel of each other and delayed the inevitable.  

A low whistle in the distance caught Haruka’s attention. He sat up quickly, blue eyes wide, and waited. Makoto blinked at the unusual stillness of the merman’s body. The whistle came again, followed by a short series of clicks, and Haruka trembled. 

Haruka released a single, shrill whistle so high in pitch Makoto winced. He repeated this several times as he glanced between Makoto and the horizon, and the way his tail flicked back and forth reminded Makoto of an eager kitten. When Makoto released him, Haruka zealously sprang forward, leaping beneath the waves and swimming out a distance. 

Makoto stood, trying to track the merman’s progress, but even with the aide of a full moon he couldn’t see clearly enough.  

A large splash from the left caught his attention, Makoto shifting his focus just in time to catch sight of Haruka’s iridescent tail before the merman was pushed back under the surface by a larger predator.  

“Haruka!” Without a second thought, Makoto rushed forward, protective instincts flaring. A lunate fin breached the surface, reflecting the moonlight, and Makoto followed it.  

The sharp whistle identical to the one he’d heard earlier echoed in the night air. Haruka did not sound particularly distressed – not like when he’d first awoken in Makoto’s bathtub – but what else could it be but a call for help?  

A high note, a low note, and a staccato click – Haruka’s identification sound, but not in Haruka’s voice. Makoto didn’t know how he was able to differentiate as this whistle was only subtly deeper, but he could, and it only increased his panic.  

_There’s something in the water!_

Makoto willed his spellbound legs to carry him out, trying to ignore the rapid fluttering of his heart that threatened to leap from his throat like a caged bird. Haruka was in danger; this was no time to let a childish fear paralyze him.  

A silvery arm burst from the water, and Makoto grabbed hold of it. “I’ve got you, Haruka!” 

He barely registered the flash of red before he was attacked, the air knocked from him by a swift blow to his midsection. He hit the water with surprising force and had a moment to realize the ironic connection to the nightmare that plagued him earlier in the day as the fuzzy reflection of the moon reached his eyes, and then sharp fangs sank into his calf.  

 _Shark!_ Makoto’s frazzled mind cried. He thrashed mindlessly against the hold, a torrent of bubbles rushing from his mouth as the teeth shredded into his leg. _It’s a shark! I’m going to die!_  

“Rin!” Haruka’s voice was a dangerous growl.  

The teeth were suddenly gone, something pushing Makoto to the surface. He breathed in sharply, chest heaving, tears mixing with the salt water dripping from his bangs. His leg throbbed. Two tails sliced through the air in powerful arcs – one the familiar purple belonging to Haruka, and the other a deep crimson that could pass for black under the night sky. Not a shark after all but still undeniably ferocious.  

The two creatures tumbled through the waves, and this time Haruka finally managed to subdue the intruder. His blue eyes were bright but angry, and his teeth were bared as he panted heavily. Even enraged, he was breathtakingly beautiful.  

Another silver body appeared – a second merman, this one with a shock of red hair and snarling lips that did little to conceal teeth far longer and sharper in appearance than Haruka’s. The two clicked at each other, still very much in the heat of their fight. Makoto could only be grateful the physical aspect had ended. He swayed on his feet, which immediately captured Haruka’s focus. In a flash the merman was at his side, hands in Makoto’s. When he turned back to the redhead, he actually _hissed_.  

The redhead swam closer, eyes raking disdainfully over Makoto. He puffed out his chest and rose a little taller from the water, as if exerting his dominance.  

Haruka lashed out when he got too close. “Makoto _bi llo ffha_.”  

At those words, the second merman halted. His crimson eyes widened incredulously as he drew in a deep breath. There must have been some kind of scent in the air detectable only by the mermen, to make the redhead jerk back in alarm. 

“ _Lle ffha...”_ He shook his head in stubborn refusal and reached out again, but Haruka curled protectively against Makoto, tail wrapping around Makoto’s leg and brushing against the raw bite mark.  

Makoto gasped as a fresh current of pain washed over him. Haruka’s eyes softened and he cooed mournfully. He shifted his arms around Makoto until he could hold on to him properly and swam him easily back to the shallows. When the sand pillowed his body at the shoreline, Makoto was laid out and his injured leg lifted for inspection.

The bite was not as bad as Makoto initially believed, but if left unattended Makoto knew there would be serious threat of infection later on. Haruka surveyed the wound, frowning deeply. Whatever medical knowledge the merman possessed obviously did not extend to human legs; even if it did, there was little to be done about it here on the beach. 

Which meant Makoto had to say goodbye far sooner than he’d planned.  

Swallowing the lump in his throat, he gestured to the sheet he’d used to conceal Haruka during the trip from the house. Haruka understood immediately and gave a concise nod before he crawled a bit further up the sand to reach the sheet. In the moonlight his entire body appeared silver, with the exception of his dark hair. Makoto wondered about his and the other merman’s relationship. Before their little scuffle, before Makoto even realized the newcomer was another of Haruka’s kind, Haruka had been happy.  

Haruka held the sheet out to him, and Makoto took it thankfully. He could feel the second merman’s eyes boring into him as he carefully wrapped his leg. Glancing up revealed a ferociously sour expression directed his way. Makoto flinched. The redhead’s arms were crossed over his chest, and he kept making Haruka’s calling sound. Haruka steadfastly ignored him, petting Makoto’s feet reassuringly.  

“Leg,” he murmured apologetically.  

Makoto smiled ruefully. They barely knew each other despite what they’d done together, but he really would miss him. “My leg will be fine,” he assured, mussing Haruka’s hair. The merman clicked indignantly and shot Makoto a disapproving look. “Once I get home I’ll bandage it properly. Soon it’ll be good as new.”  

“Good... as new,” Haruka sounded out.  

“It means I’ll get better.” Finished tying the sheet in place, Makoto took one of Haruka’s hands, marveling again at the coolness of his skin. So badly he wanted to take Haruka with him, but a cramped apartment bathtub was no place for such an elegant creature. Haruka deserved his freedom, and Makoto cared enough for him to not wish to see him trapped. “Haruka...”  

Haruka pressed his free hand to Makoto’s heart. Makoto mirrored the action and smiled as Haruka leaned in to kiss him.  

A loud splash caught Makoto’s attention. One glance proved the red-haired merman had vanished.  

“As new,” Haruka said again, once they parted. He frowned, seeming to search for the right words. When he lifted his gaze, his blue eyes were bright, determined. “Make… better.”  

Makoto nodded. “I’ll make it better, don’t worry.”  

Haruka shook his head. “Haruka—” he pointed to himself “—make better.”  

Not for the first time in the merman’s presence, Makoto was rendered speechless. Haruka wrapped his hands around the sheet encasing Makoto’s leg, intentionally applying pressure to the injury. Air hissed through Makoto’s clenched teeth, and he gripped the material of his soaked khaki shorts with enough force to turn the knuckles white. “Haruka, stop. That—” He wheezed as Haruka pressed harder. “That hurts!” 

Haruka did not listen – did not appear to have even heard the request. His lips moved but no words came out, and his eyes exhibited a luminescence unlike the typical sparkle of intrigue Makoto had grown accustomed to. The whites of his eyes actually glowed, pupils swallowing the blue iris.  

A pang of fear held Makoto’s heart in an icy grip. The water around their bodies grew hot, bubbling at the surface but not quite scalding to the touch. Even still the sight was enough to panic Makoto, who pleaded once more for Haruka to stop. He insisted he could bandage the wound just fine on his own, and again Haruka disregarded him, as he was prone to when he had an idea in mind. In the end there was little Makoto could do besides bite his lip and endure the uncomfortable sensation of pins-and-needles spreading through his body.  

Pain knifed through his leg, centralizing in the wound. It was worse than the bite – far, far worse. As if a dagger was slowly cutting circles into flesh, digging through the muscle and dragging upward at a torturously slow pace. Makoto curled in on himself, tasting salt as he parted his lips in a silent scream. Right as his vision began to swim and he teetered just on the edge of passing out, Haruka released him. The stirring in the water around them came to a sudden stop, and the white-hot pain ebbed.  

When Haruka raised his eyes, the blue irises were back to normal. He offered a tiny smile. “Better.” 

True to his word, Makoto’s leg indeed felt better. Peeling the bed sheet away revealed his perfectly unscathed leg, with not a hint of the bite remaining. Makoto bent the knee, touching his skin in amazement, unable to quite wrap his mind around what just occurred.  

A series of clicks issued from Haruka as the merman nuzzled Makoto’s knee, and the missing puzzle piece snapped into place.  

“That blood...” There’d been so much blood that night when he found Haruka, but he’d never found an injury on the merman’s body. Makoto stared incredulously, awed by this new revelation. “You healed yourself, didn’t you?” That was the only explanation. Thrumming with excitement, Makoto threw his arms around the merman. “You’re amazing, Haruka! That’s really incredible! Can you all do that?”  

Haruka tipped his had to the side. “Better,” he said. Makoto laughed and held him tighter. After a moment, Haruka timidly returned the embrace. 

Noticing movement in his peripheral vision, Makoto directed his attention back over the waves. The red-haired merman was closer now but still maintained a safe distance, his narrow eyes studying Makoto distrustfully.   

“Rin,” Haruka said, and then whistled the single high note that must have been the other merman’s identification sound.  

Rin stiffened, somewhat cowed by the accusatory glare Haruka sent him. Makoto could only assume Haruka had some kind of authority over him, but there really was no way for him to know for sure. Just another mystery. Whatever the reason, Rin kept his animosity to himself as he sidled up next to Haruka. 

“Makoto _bi llo ffha_.” Haruka took Makoto’s hand and one of Rin’s hands. “Rin _bi llo ffha.”_ Rin nodded begrudgingly and Haruka turned expectantly to Makoto, who could only assume he’d missed something. 

An unpleasant bitterness curdled his insides, which Makoto desperately willed away. Really, this shouldn’t have surprised him. Haruka wasn’t like him. Humans were one of the few species that mated for life, and considering the climbing divorce rate even that seldom worked out. Still, some naïve part of him clung to the notion that what he’d shared with Haruka had been significant to both of them – and not just because it shouldn’t have been possible.  

Somewhat disillusioned, Makoto pulled back and sighed quietly. He supposed it didn’t matter anyways. After he said goodbye, he was likely never to see the merman again. If nothing else, Rin seemed intent on getting Haruka to leave; Makoto was sure he would be equally focused on ensuring Haruka never returned. He didn’t strike Makoto as particularly jealous, just overprotective. Trusting humans obviously did not come naturally to them, and why should it? Humans had a nasty, parasitic habit of taking things that did not belong to them.  

As if sensing his change in mood, Haruka closed in next to him, clicking rapidly. 

Makoto smiled, but it did not quite reach his eyes. “There’re so many things I wish I could ask you still.” Even if there were time, though, Makoto did not think he would ever receive the answers. He cupped Haruka’s cheek, caressing the smooth pearlescent skin under his eye, passing his thumb over full lips. Haruka rested his webbed hands on Makoto’s knees and leaned into his touch. “Haruka, I—”  

Rin scoffed. “Haru. He prefers Haru.” 

Makoto balked, completely taken off guard by both the rough voice and the nearly flawless Japanese that came out of Rin’s mouth. “W-what – You... How can you speak so well?”

Those sharp teeth flashed in a haughty grin. “I am _Kallotom_. Hunter. It’s my duty to travel close to the surface. I know many languages.” 

Makoto resisted the urge to pinch himself. As surreal as his time with Haruka had been, this was even stranger. “So then Haruka – um, Haru... is he a hunter too?”  

Rin pulled a face that easily conveyed how ignorant he believed humans. He slid one of his muscular arms around Haruka and began to trace deliberate, invisible patterns on his skin. In response Haruka’s eyes lidded sensually. “Haru is _Sessmalla_.” Rin paused, then waved his free hand dismissively. “Your coarse tongue has no word for this. But he should never have been in this shallow of water.”  

At this, whatever spell Rin had been weaving broke and Haruka went off on a tirade of irate whistles and clicks. Rin argued back with him, and Makoto sensed a very long history between the two. When Haruka took their hands before, he seemed to be claiming them both. The burning question that ravaged him earlier surfaced again: was Rin Haruka’s mate? It made sense, and certainly accounted for both Rin’s aggressive behavior earlier and loath passivity now. 

“Is Haruka your lover?” Makoto tried to remember the words Haruka used. “Y-yofah?” Unexpectedly, Rin burst out laughing. Haruka’s eyebrows furrowed in bewilderment. Flushing, Makoto scratched the back of his neck. “Um... I mean, your mate?”  

When Rin calmed down enough to answer, he said again, “Haru is _Sessmalla_ ,” as if that explained everything. “He can mate with whomever he wants and claim whomever he desires as _lli ffha_.” Makoto did not miss the snide undertone of his voice as Rin stressed the last two words. Rin tilted his head thoughtfully and dragged his eyes down the length of Makoto’s body. “You’re his only human.”  

Not his only lover, though. To cover the piddling stab of envy, Makoto attempted a joke. “I guess that makes me special?” 

Rin didn’t share his amusement. Haruka was obviously someone of importance among his kind. “Haru wasn’t in his right mind when he came here. He can’t return.” 

Haruka screeched defiantly, but the tactic did not intimidate Rin this time around. He bared his teeth at the smaller merman, clicking in reprimand, and like an admonished child Haruka curled his arms around Makoto and looked stubbornly to the side.  

Makoto placed a comforting hand atop Haruka’s head, combing lightly through the dark strands. “I know,” he told Rin, earning surprised looks from both mermen. Makoto stared down at the bloody mark left on the sheet from Rin’s bite. “I knew the moment I found him I wouldn’t be able to keep him. That’s why I brought him back here.”  

For a moment Rin didn’t say anything. Apparently, and understandably, he’d been expecting more resistance. Most humans who happened upon a supposedly mythological species would not let evidence of their discovery slip away so easily. 

Makoto considered himself fortunate enough to merely have met Haruka; it was more than he ever could have asked for to have been intimate with him, and learn a bit about him in the process. He could never share that information with anyone, but he could at least carry it with him.  

“I know I shouldn’t have brought him back at all. But I thought he’d been hurt, and I—I couldn’t just leave him there. And then...” Makoto’s voice trailed off helplessly, hand stilling in Haruka’s hair. When Haruka turned his eyes upward, Makoto’s heart leapt into his throat.  

 _And then you looked at me with those eyes..._  

Rin smirked. “ _Sessmalla_ have that effect.” 

There’d been no way of denying Haruka. As much as Makoto piqued the merman’s curiosity, Haruka captivated Makoto, because of his beauty and because he was so extraordinary, and because Makoto knew he would never see anything like him again as long as he lived. And even more than that, there was something enthralling about his very spirit that drew Makoto in without even trying.  

“Well, I can’t take it back now. And I wouldn’t anyways.”  

Rin’s expression changed – just a slight softening around the eyes and corners of the mouth, which he covered up with a loud huff, but not before Makoto noticed. He had the distinct feeling Rin was a lot more compassionate than his rugged exterior implied.  

“You should go,” Makoto said at last, nodding toward the harbor. Fishermen began their days early, most boats leaving the harbor even before the sun rose.  

Rin followed his gaze. When he turned back to Makoto, his features were slightly more amiable. Makoto smiled at him and extended a hand. Unlike with Haruka, the meaning of the gesture was not lost on him. As he shook Makoto’s hand, Makoto wondered where he had traveled and what he had witnessed to be able to pick up on it. After his friendly acknowledgement, Rin swam further out, allowing Makoto and Haruka a moment’s privacy for their goodbyes.  

Makoto was thankful. There were not many heartfelt words he and Haruka could exchange that the other could fully understand, but what Makoto felt could be expressed without words. He pulled Haruka to him, as if he could burn each subtle curve of the cool, silver body into his memory through touch alone. 

Haruka nicked his bottom lip and licked into Makoto’s mouth, as he had done the first time they kissed in the bath. The coppery tang of blood filled Makoto’s senses, but it was not unpleasant. As with everything Haruka did, Makoto was sure the action had some sort of meaning, and so, desperate to fulfill whatever sort of blood pact this was, Makoto snagged his own lip on one of Haruka’s sharp teeth and did the same. He coated the inside of Haruka’s mouth with the blood that beaded on his lips, and when they parted, breaths mingling, he promised, “I will see you again.” 

 Makoto did not want to let go, but Haruka eventually slipped from his arms. The merman made no promises of his own, but his oceanic eyes glimmered in a way Makoto had yet to see. Haruka touched just under his eye, and a small, perfect orb of water balanced on the tip of his silver finger when he pulled it away. Curious, Makoto watched with rapt attention as Haruka used his other hand to pluck a azure scale from his tail. When Haruka dipped his finger to the water, the tear solidified, trapping the scale within. 

A process that should naturally have taken years happened instantaneously before his eyes, and Makoto could only gawk as Haruka passed the newly formed stone into his hands.  

“ _Peshjiuun llo bi lle ffha_ ,” Haruka whispered. He picked up Makoto’s hand and pressed it, along with the stone, to his belly. Makoto’s lips parted but he could not form words. His fingers twitched instinctively against the moonlit skin. “ _Peshjiuun lle bi llo ffha_.”  

The implication was undoubtedly clear: a part of each of them would go with the other. Even while the ocean separated them, they would never truly be apart. 

And if they were connected in this way, perhaps somehow they could find a way to be together again.  

As Makoto watched the sun rise in the distance, the shimmering of Haruka’s body long since vanished into the endless blue, he held tight to the parting gift lovingly entrusted to him and again recited his vow.  

_I’ll see you again._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1.) It's mermaid language time!
> 
> Llo (YOH): I/my/me Lle (YEH): you/your Bi (BEE): is/am/are/was
> 
> Llo ffha (YOH-fah): mine (belonging to me)   
> Lle ffha (YEH-fah): yours (belonging to you)   
> Lli ffha (YEE-fah): his/hers (belonging to him/her)
> 
> Peshjiuun llo bi lle ffha (pesh-GEE-un yoh bee yeh-fah): a piece of me is yours   
> Peshjiuun lle bi llo ffha ((pesh-GEE-un yeh bee yoh-fah): a piece of you is mine
> 
> Sessmalla (SESS-mah-yah): chosen of mermaids (reserved for third gender only)   
> Kallotom (KAYO-tome): hunter/warrior, often travels close to the surface in search for food and to ensure an area is clear of predators   
> Sessa (SESS-ah): an average mermaid/merman
> 
> 2.) The mer hierarchy
> 
> Sessmalla or Sesshulla - Kallotom - Sessa
> 
> Sessmalla are like the queen bee. They're the top of the food chain of their kind, and are the closest thing the mer have to 'royalty' because they are so rare. Among their kind they are considered precious. As mentioned in 'If Only', the Sessmalla can change from male to female, are known to be healthier, and their pregnancies have higher chance of reaching full term. But the Sessmalla don't just mate with everyone in their pod because they can; they're known for being very selective, and I imagine Haruka as even more selective than most. When they are with child, like any mermaid, they are extremely vulnerable to predators and are usually under the guard of a Kallotom. A mermaid or merman who mates with a Sessmalla usually does not take another partner.
> 
> Sesshulla (SESS-hoo-yah) would be the mer in charge if there is no Sessmalla to lead the pod. Typically the Sesshulla is the strongest female in the pod. In Haruka's pod, since he is Sessmalla, there is no Sesshulla.
> 
> Kallotom are the hunters and warriors of the mer. They are in charge of both ensuring the safety of the pod and leading the pod to food.
> 
> Sessa is the average mermaid or merman in the pod.
> 
> 3.) So is Rin Haru's mate?
> 
>  I didn't really add more than a RinHaru implication to this story since this is about Makoto's encounter with Haruka, but yes. Rin is one of Haruka's mates.
> 
> 4.) Haruka's healing abilities
> 
> All Sessa have the ability to heal very quickly. The Sessmalla are gifted beyond even the normal standards, because they can heal others.


	4. Chapter 4

_Three Years Later_

“Don’t forget, you must submit the first draft of your independent research projects by the end of next week,” the professor shouted over the end-of-class ritual of aimless chatter and zipping backpacks. Professor Ryuugazaki was a recent graduate of the university, and while revered as one of the youngest marine biology students to earn a doctorate, being so close in age to his students did not bode well for managing a classroom. Most of the time they were respectful and attentive, but getting the class under control at the end of a Friday was still something he had to work on.

A particularly clumsy girl knocked over the precarious stack of binders and notebooks on her desk, sending loose pages flying and triggering a raucous fit of laughter. Makoto cast her a sympathetic look and stooped to help her gather her belongings, but she ducked her head in embarrassment and insisted she could do it on her own. As students filed out the door, forming plans amongst themselves for the weekend, Makoto shouldered his own book bag.

Professor Ryuugazaki beckoned him over before he could even make it down the auditorium steps. “Tachibana-kun, may I have a word?”

When Makoto reached the front podium he offered a smile, which the professor did not return. “Is something wrong? I know I turned in my research topic a bit last minute, but I’m pretty sure it still made the deadline? Unless I had the dates mixed up...” His voice trailed off and he scratched the back of his neck, unsure of what else to say. He’d never been in trouble with a professor before, and really he couldn’t think of what else he might have done aside from turn in the assignment tardy.

“You made the deadline just fine,” the professor assured him. His thin hands grasped a yellow folder, the same one he’d passed out to all his students upon first mention of the research project. On the bottom right-hand corner of the folder Makoto’s name was written in permanent marker. “It’s your research topic that isn’t acceptable.”

Makoto’s smile faltered. “My topic?”

“I don’t doubt you’ll find adequate text research, but even still I can’t approve your choosing a mythological creature. This is partially an _observational_ study.” Professor Ryuugazaki handed the folder back to him. Blushing, Makoto took it and opened to the first page, where a red ‘ _Insufficient_ ’ marred a detailed breakdown of the main points he’d hoped to make on his project. Makoto opened his mouth to protest, but the professor held up a hand. “While I appreciate your imagination, I think it would be suited best for another field of study. Creative Writing, perhaps, or World Mythologies.”

He clearly hadn’t intended for the words to be hurtful, for the glint in his eyes behind the thick-framed glasses conveyed a soft encouragement. Ryuugazaki didn’t want to stifle Makoto’s creativity, but he obviously touted the widespread belief that such topics of fantasy were inappropriate in a scientific setting. Nevertheless, a sting of humiliation shot through Makoto. It slid down his throat and festered in the pit of his stomach as he accepted his demerit and promised to choose a more applicable research topic, and stayed with him during the trip from campus to his apartment, gradually spreading throughout his body like a slow, burning poison.

He didn’t know what he’d been thinking when he submitted the research proposal. Maybe he’d been no different than the other students trying to take advantage of Professor Ryuugazaki’s new-hire status; or maybe he’d just wanted to bare his heart to someone in the same field as himself, who might understand but was bound by student-teacher confidentiality to keep private.

Makoto gingerly touched the stone that hung by a simple brown rope around his neck – an iridescent azure scale permanently trapped within crystal. The stone was always pleasantly cool to the touch, despite its confinement against his skin by layers of clothing, and even after all this time Makoto swore he still felt a hand passing the keepsake to him, holding it to his heart.

Three years had passed since he’d last seen Haruka.

The first month after their initial parting, Makoto had wandered the beach nightly in search of him, and to his great surprise Haruka actually met him several times under the pier near where he’d first made his discovery. These visits lasted no more than a couple of hours, Rin always surfacing too soon to take a begrudging Haruka back with him, but they fueled Makoto’s belief that, somehow, they could have a lasting relationship.

Makoto realized the flaws in that idea now, of course, the most glaring being that despite their attraction to each other they were of two different _species._ Haruka could not dwell on land any more than Makoto could live under the water, and their ritual meetings were a danger to the both of them. As much as Makoto wanted to shout from the rooftops about the entrancing creature he loved, to do so would expose the entire Sessa race, and then he and Haruka truly would be parted forever.

Midway through the second month, Haruka’s visits became less and less frequent. Some nights Makoto would approach their usual spot beneath the pier and discover only Rin, his magnificent thresher tail submerged beneath the waves, waiting for him. While not seeing Haruka disappointed him, Rin was fascinating company in his own right, despite being quick to anger and prone to ditching Makoto without warning. It was Rin, more so than Haruka, who taught Makoto about his kind. He was hesitant to reveal too much information, but fond of gloating, especially if it meant showing off how the Sessa were superior to humans. Rin explained how Haruka acted as leader of their pod, both a symbol of fertility to their kind and in charge of overseeing the rearing of newborns.

And it was Rin who told him, just at the start of the third month, that Haruka would lead the pod in their migration. This was a gestation period for the Sessa, which meant slow, careful travel to more remote waters, where they would birth and raise their young.

Rin had promised their return, but pointedly never gave any indication of when that might be.

It was easy to assume after the first year combing the beach revealed naught a sign of a silver body or pearlescent tail, that they would never return. Rin emphasized the importance of partners among their species – how while Sessmalla could mate with as many Sessa as he chose, whom he chose as his partner meant something else entirely – but, at the end of the day, Makoto accepted that his idea of a life partner and Haruka’s remained vastly different. Or, even if it didn’t, it made far more sense for Haruka to choose a partner who could constantly be with him rather than someone he might occasionally meet on the beach for a few hours at a time.

What killed Makoto was never saying a proper goodbye. Despite Rin’s assurances – and they’d seemed genuine at the time – the pod had clearly moved on. Haruka had moved on.

Maybe that was the real reason he chose sirens for his research project: a last-ditch attempt to discover Haruka again – to have an excuse to seek him out.

_Well, it doesn’t matter now._

After flipping through his textbook that night, Makoto decided on the much safer and more appropriate topic of the Spinner Dolphin. He didn’t know much observation he was likely to get done given his obstinate refusal to set foot on a boat, but he was sure a trip to the nearby dolphin research center would be able to help him out in that regard. Professor Ryuugazaki would be pleased, if nothing else.

* * * *

A voice called out to him every time he slept, deep and melodic. He knew it anywhere, but putting a name to it brought nothing but pain, and so he closed his eyes and tried to forget. But even as he willed it away the voice pursued him, a mournful song reaching out for his very soul, intent to drag him down.

_“Makoto.”_

Something brushed his side – the cool, sensual caress of a frilled tail. Makoto shuddered and blindly reached out. Even if it only brought heartbreak, Makoto had to see him. Even if he awoke only to an empty bed, Makoto had to feel him.

Haruka’s tail curled invitingly around his waist, drawing them closer together. Together they floated in an endless stretch of blue that could only belong to Iwatobi Bay. Alone in the sea with Haruka, swimming unafraid alongside him... If only such things were possible.

Thin, webbed fingers cupped the sides of his face as Haruka pushed their foreheads together. “Makoto _bi llo ffha_.”

Makoto held him desperately and sealed the gap between their lips. His erection pressed insistently against Haruka’s slit. “Haruka...”

Haruka’s bright blue eyes locked with his, and for a moment Makoto forgot how to breathe. He was so beautiful, so indescribably _beautiful_ , Makoto wanted—

“Makoto? Earth to Makoto!”

Something hit the back of his head and Makoto started, leaping up from the table with a sharp cry and nearly spilling his soda everywhere. Nagisa caught the bottle before it could topple over, not bothering to hide his amusement.

“Oh my God,” Nagisa crowed, smacking the table enthusiastically. “You’re such a spaz!”

Makoto’s cheeks colored brightly. “You smacked me on the head,” he pointed out, trying to hide his embarrassment. “What did you think would happen?” With a sigh, he directed his sulking toward his pizza crust, which he probably had a higher chance of receiving sympathy from than the giggling demon across from him. Nagisa had been Makoto’s best friend since elementary school. Although they were a year apart in age and didn’t have much in common, Nagisa had latched himself onto Makoto from the get-go, and his outgoing personality had been a good influence in bringing the shyer Makoto out of his shell. However, none of that history exempted Makoto from Nagisa’s mischief.

When his laughter finally eased, Nagisa leaned forward over the table, chin in his hands. “So, who’s Haruka?”

A theatre student and notorious class clown, Nagisa’s life mission seemed to be tormenting Makoto, but this topic came completely out of left field. Nagisa shouldn’t know anything about Haruka. Despite wanting to confide in someone about his phenomenal discovery, Makoto remained steadfastly tightlipped over the years. “W-what?”

Nagisa played with his straw. “You were saying it in your sleep.” He struck a dramatic pose, slinging an arm across his forehead. “Haruka” – the pose changed suddenly, as did the tone of his voice, to one breathy and impassioned – “ _Haruka_!”

The tips of Makoto’s ears burned. He stared resolutely at the pink and yellow straw swirling round and round in Nagisa’s bottle. “Ah, that...” The phantom brush of Haruka’s body against his own made his lips tingle, but thankfully he hadn’t awoken aroused. Had he really said lewd things in his sleep? “It’s nothing.”

Nagisa did not look convinced. “It didn’t sound like nothing. Is she your girlfriend?”

“No! I – Haruka is...” Makoto fidgeted, unsure of how to explain – or, better yet, get Nagisa to drop the subject. “Well, he doesn’t live here, so it doesn’t matter.”

That proved an immediate wrong choice of words, as Nagisa’s grin threatened to consume his entire face. Magenta eyes twinkled conspiratorially as Nagisa rubbed his hands together. “ _He?_ I didn’t know you were batting for the other team now.”

Makoto blushed darkly. Although he’d confessed he might be bi in middle school, he’d never told Nagisa about his sexual experimentation during their first semester in college. Not because he didn’t care about Nagisa, more like he didn’t want the entire rest of campus finding out. Nagisa was an infamously bad secret keeper; Makoto learned that lesson the hard way very early in their friendship, when he confided he’d wet the bed after watching a scary movie in sixth grade. He shuddered at the memory of jeering eleven-year-olds asking him if he still wore diapers.

Nagisa flashed him a thumb’s-up, but he was observant enough of Makoto’s fallen spirits to drop the subject of Haruka for now, though Makoto not fool enough to believe the information hadn’t been stored away in that devious mind for canon fodder in the future. 

“I think you’d make an excellent boyfriend,” Nagisa was saying, as he flipped aimlessly through his biology text.

Right, he was supposed to be helping Nagisa study for an exam. Nagisa’s parents were more practical than their son, and only agreed with Nagisa choosing a theatre major on the condition he minor in something that could actually get him a real job after graduation. Naturally Nagisa had picked a subject his best friend excelled at so he could always have a private tutor on hand.

Makoto jumped as Nagisa suddenly reached across the table and grasped his hands. “Oh, Makoto, won’t you be my bride?”

“What?” Makoto ripped his hands away. “What are you talking about?”

“I was just thinking about how cute a boyfriend you’d would be. I bet you’re the sort who packs an extra lunch to share, and always has tissues when you have a cold, and always surprises you with presents to brighten your day. And then I remembered how cute you are with your little brother and sister and I thought, gee, Makoto’d probably be a good mom—”

“Why would I be the _mom_?” Makoto demanded, aghast.

“And then I just pictured you taking care of the kids and the house. Your cooking needs work, but you try and that’s what matters. And you’d wear those cute frilly aprons.” Makoto fought to keep his face from combusting into flame at the sheer ridiculousness, but Nagisa didn’t stop there. He took Makoto’s hand again and made a show of kissing the palm. “So you simply _have_ to be my wife! I’m calling first dibs, I’ve been there for you the longest.”

Makoto silently thanked whatever deity listening they were in the safety of Nagisa’s apartment and the embarrassing proposal – or whatever he should call that – hadn’t occurred for the student body to see.

Somehow he managed to pry his hand free. While he didn’t think Nagisa would ever pass him up, he’d grown like a weed at the end of high school, and his size, while still not comparable to Makoto’s own bulk, now only reminded Makoto that even as the shortest boy in his class Nagisa had always been strong.

“I thought you were seeing someone,” Makoto said, to ease the petulant frown on Nagisa’s face.

Nagisa’s expression brightened at the reminder, but only slightly. “Rei-chan is so not the nurturing type,” he whined. “Whenever I complain about something, he tells me to deal with it on my own because” – he pitched his voice a little deeper– “a struggle is good for character building.”

“Was that supposed to be him?”

Despite the put-on, Nagisa’s voice had a distinct lilt. His drama professors were constantly on his case about it, Makoto knew, because apparently a person’s voice could greatly reduce the amount of roles an actor could play. Naturally Makoto was the person called upon – usually during the inconvenient late hours after rehearsal, when Makoto would rather be sleeping - for Nagisa to practice building his range.

“It sounded just like him,” Nagisa said, and stuck his tongue out.

Makoto picked up his soda and drank slowly, more to bide for time than anything else. An opportunity to tease Nagisa rarely surfaced, and he fully intended to take advantage. “So you say. But it’s been two months and I still haven’t met the guy. For all I know you could be just making him up.”

Nagisa heaved a sigh, abandoning all pretense of studying as he swiped his books to the side and threw himself over the table, arms stretched toward Makoto. “Rei-chan’s so shy,” he said. “I keep telling him to come over, or to just come out when we go to the movies or whatever, but he’s afraid of what people will think.”

“Because he’s older?” Makoto didn’t know much about his friend’s most recent love interest, but he’d been told at least that much, and also that ‘Rei-chan’ apparently worked at the university. Makoto could understand how people might get the wrong idea about a professor engaging in a relationship with one of her students, but from what Nagisa said they weren’t in the same department, so it wasn’t as if he was getting any favors out of their dating, grades-wise. He cast Nagisa a compassionate smile. “It’s not even that much of a gap. What is he, twenty-three?”

“Twenty- _four_ ,” Nagisa moaned.

“That’s only five years. It’s not a big deal.” Better than his own situation, at any rate, where he still didn’t know Haruka’s age. According to Rin, the Sessa grew and developed almost parallel to humans up until their sexual maturity, when their aging stalled for a length of time. They were not eternal, but their lifespans did generally outclass their land-dwelling relatives.

“ _I_ know that. And I’m sure he does too, he’s just too focused on what people will say. It’s a bit weird, y’know?”

“Not that weird.” To show his support, and also because Nagisa was nothing if not an attention-seeker, Makoto patted him encouragingly on the head. “If he ever comes around, I’d love to meet him.”

Their study session wrapped not long after that, Nagisa declaring he wanted to call his boyfriend to try and convince him to meet his friends and Makoto, hardly refreshed from his quick nap, happy enough to give him privacy. Despite the tired drag of his limbs, the remnants of his dream spurred him to take the long route home. He stared out over the horizon as he walked the shoreline, taking in the sparkle of moonlight on the constant shift of the waves.

He’d long accepted he’d probably never see Haruka again, but sometimes he could not stop the flick of his eyes over the water, the vigil for a flash of silver or iridescent fluke disappearing under the waves. There was nothing, of course, but the water lapping gently at his feet and the swelling of his own heart.

He did not know if the Sessa were the unknown presence in the ocean he’d sworn he could feel all his life, but ever since meeting Haruka his fear of the endless blue shriveled. It still existed, darkness in the back of his mind that reared its ugly head occasionally, usually in his defenseless sleep, but for the most part he could fight it off.

After a while, his feet carried him near to where he’d first discovered Haruka; the rocks they’d met upon many a night before Haruka’s unexplained disappearance, where Haruka brought him gifts from the sea (a sign of courtship, Rin enlightened him) and Makoto attempted to teach Haruka Japanese before inevitably they would resolve the ache of having to part by kissing each other breathless.

Far more nights than he would care to admit Makoto spent upon those rocks since then, hoping, waiting like the lovers of old tales waited for their sailors to return from sea. A small, jealous part of him wondered if Haruka had another mate to whom he brought gifts now.

Sessmalla can mate with whomever they please, Rin had said. Although he also said Haruka was extremely picky with whom he chose to open himself up to so intimately. Rin was not kind enough to divulge how many Sessa _had_ met Haruka’s standards; apparently it wasn’t a human’s business, and Makoto should feel honored to have been chosen at all. Most of the time, even after all these years, it only confused him.

Not that dwelling on it now did him any good.

If Makoto were smart, he would move on. Give up the poisonous dream of ‘ _maybe one day’_ slowly eating away at him and focus instead on the number of healthy and, more importantly, lasting relationships he could have in his life. Makoto did not consider himself a heartthrob by any stretch of the imagination, but he supposed he was attractive in an unassuming way, and for the most part people seemed to like him. So why couldn’t he let go?

Why was he still drawn to the ocean, pulled by the sound of a voice he hadn’t heard in three years?

Makoto picked up a flat stone come loose from the jagged rocks of the outcropping. With a flick of the wrist he sent it skipping over the waves. When it finally sunk, he laid back on the rock and pillowed his head in his arms.

What felt like not even a minute later – but from the position of the moon had to actually be a few hours – a high-pitched squeal jolted him awake.

His feet carried him of their own volition, kicking up water until he’d waded in past his thighs and started to propel himself with his arms. He’d had Nagisa give him a few basic swimming lessons since his encounter with Haruka, and while he had nothing in terms of proper form he could at least keep himself afloat. Not being able to see his own feet at the bottom made him tremble, but the thought that he might finally be reunited with Haruka spurred him on.

A shrill whistle, and Makoto’s breath caught as he spotted the small, thrashing body tangled in a shark net.

The nets were designed under the principal of “fewer sharks, fewer attacks,” and kept sharks and other large animals from venturing too close to shore. Due to the bycatch of endangered species, they were greatly frowned upon, and protested against by the city’s marine conservationists especially.

He wished he carried a pocketknife on him, or anything that might help him free the poor creature. Hopefully its body wasn’t so entangled he could manage with his hands – if he was able to bring it to shore at all.

It reminded him of finding Haruka, even though he could already tell this merman was not the lover he’d lost. The pearlescent tail gleamed a pale lavender in the moonlight, but the most obvious clue was the merman’s size. Even with the length of the tail adding an allusion of maturity, the human portion of the body was tiny, no bigger than a toddler’s. His heart went out to the poor thing, whose despairing whimpers and cries tugged at Makoto’s every nurturing instinct.

Somehow he got his arms around the Sessa, and began a slow trek back to the shore. The net dragged in the water behind him, Makoto relieved to discover it only a remnant that must have broken off. Keeping the lower half of the body submerged in water, Makoto eased the Sessa gently onto his back and winced at the lashes that marred the silvery skin. There was nothing Makoto could do for him on the beach aside from untangle him. With luck, the youngling’s parents were nearby in search of him.

“You’ll be fine,” he whispered, petting the merman’s silky black hair in an attempt to soothe him. “I’m going to take care of you.” The merman clicked in a way that sounded like whining, his terrified downturned eyes locked on Makoto’s. Weakly he tried to wriggle away, but the net impeded his movement. Makoto hushed him comfortingly. “I’m going to get you out of this, but you need to stop.” There was no use explaining himself, as he figured the Sessa far too young to have picked up on any human language yet. Maybe he spoke only to ease his own frantic heart. “The more you struggle, the worse the tangle will get.”

Lulled by the calming murmur of his voice, the merman gradually stopped moving. First his arms stilled at his sides, enough for Makoto to work the intricate knots loose and slide the net from around narrow shoulders, and then the tail ceased its restless back-and-forth swish. The tail’s length and many frays made it more of a challenge, but eventually Makoto was able to free the creature.

Once the net was cast aside, the Sessa wiggled again, experimentally.

“There’s nothing I can do for the cuts,” Makoto said, apologetic. Wide blue eyes blinked owlishly. They reminded him of Haruka. “Can you swim?”

A series of clicks answered him, and the toddler held his hands up. Despite the language and species barriers, the unspoken plea to be held was universal and warmed Makoto’s heart to see. A child was a child, and when afraid, nothing comforted as much as the embrace of a parent or adult.

Makoto held him tight, smiling at the way the toddler nuzzled into his chest. In the distance Makoto heard another call. Two high notes, followed by one low, which the young merman reacted to in a way that Makoto realized it was his calling sound.

“Someone’s looking for you,” he said, loosening his hold on the little body. “That’s good.” He’d been afraid to let the young merman back into the ocean alone.

The toddler squirmed to look back out at the bay, but did not attempt to free himself from Makoto’s hold otherwise. The whistle sounded again, softly inquisitive, and this time the child answered. His voice was high and sweet, and the sound he made achingly familiar.

One high note, one low note, and a staccato _click_.

Disbelief stole the very breath from his lungs as hesitantly Makoto lifted his gaze to open water. A short distance away, a dark shape bobbed among the waves, drawing steadily closer.

Silky black hair, piercing blue eyes, even the slight roundness to his cheeks... How did Makoto imagine this child as anyone other than Haruka’s?

“It’s you, isn’t it?” The wind carried his whisper over the crash of the waves, and Makoto saw the exact moment Haruka heard. “You were gone so long... I didn’t think you’d ever come back.”

Haruka turned his head to the side in his telltale signal of avoidance. Perhaps Haruka truly never intended to see him again. For some reason, and not merely ego, Makoto could not accept that as truth. The moon revealed an embarrassed flush to Haruka’s skin. He whistled for the child again.

The toddler in Makoto’s arms nuzzled resolutely at his chest, tightening his grip around Makoto’s shoulders, showing he very obviously did not wish to go anywhere. The little sounds he made wanted desperately to form words, but never extended beyond elongated vowels and too-sharp consonants.

As any parent met with disobedience, Haruka’s expression darkened. His voice turned harder, but still the child ignored him in favor of Makoto.

“He’s yours, right?” Makoto didn’t look away from Haruka. “I should’ve known. He looks just like you.” Not wanting to be the source of discontent, he pried the Sessa’s arms from around him. The youngling squealed in protest. “And I think he has your temperament.”

Haruka did not answer for a long moment. Then, he gestured to the child. “Mieko.”

Makoto wondered if Mieko was Sessmalla like Haruka. Rin had said that being born as such was exceptionally rare, but perhaps it was a genetic trait Haruka could pass on to his children? Or maybe all Sessa were born as one gender, and changed once they hit their equivalent of puberty. Makoto didn’t know. Whatever the case, Mieko was beautiful, and he did not hesitate to tell Haruka that.

Haruka blushed but made no comment. Makoto yearned to go to him, but he noticed the deliberate distance the merman kept between them – how he called out for Mieko rather than coming to retrieve the child himself. A painful lump lodged itself in his throat, but Makoto forced himself to swallow it down. He nudged Mieko off his lap.

Mieko glanced up at him, blue eyes wide and despondent. There was something familiar about them, aside from the color, but Makoto couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

Finally – and looking extremely regretful all the while – Mieko drifted out toward deeper water. Haruka held out his arms for the child, but Mieko flicked his tail and passed him by. Makoto could not understand the youngling’s hostility, so contradictory to how affectionate he’d been when Makoto held him.

Haruka turned back to the water, and Makoto jumped to his feet. The loud splash caused Haruka’s bright blue eyes to flicker in his direction.

“Wait.” Haruka stiffened as he drew closer. “ _Please_ —” Before he could dive below the surface as he was poised to do, Makoto managed to grab his elbow. The skin was smooth and cool to the touch as he remembered.  “Haruka...”

Mieko stared at them from where he floated several feet away. As much as Makoto wanted to pull Haruka flush against him and reignite whatever spark they’d once shared, he wouldn’t do that in front of Haruka’s child. Instead, he kept his grip loose enough that Haruka could easily pull away if he so desired.

“Will I see you again?”

Haruka frowned, and Makoto feared he really was overstepping some boundaries – that Haruka really wanted nothing more to do with him. What happened in the past three years? Back when Rin first insisted they could not see each other, Haruka had been furious. He’d literally attacked Rin for merely insinuating he stay away from Makoto. So what had changed?

“I just...” Makoto took a deep breath, hating the tears that gathered in his eyes. He couldn’t cry about this - not when Haruka’s face remained so impassive, not while Mieko watched with single-minded interest. “I missed you,” he confessed. He pulled the stone – Haruka’s parting gift – out from under his sodden shirt, and swore Haruka’s eyes widened slightly upon catching sight of it. “I’ve thought about you every day, and I – even when I thought you’d never come back, I _still_...”

Haruka’s hand settled against his chest, over the stone. Unidentifiable emotions swam in his eyes. Makoto’s heart hammered against his rib cage as the Sessa came closer, almost close enough for their bodies to brush. He felt the tickle of Haruka’s hair – longer now than it had been three years ago – at his sternum as the frilled tail slid apologetically around his legs.

Makoto didn’t want to beg, but he found the words coming out anyways. “Please say you’ll come back.”

A harsh searchlight fell over the beach. Makoto squinted as it landed upon him. He didn’t have to look to know both Haruka and Mieko had disappeared.

Someone ushered him from the water, chastising him about swimming in the ocean so late at night. Makoto didn’t hear any of it. Only one voice reverberated in his mind, one promising whisper, and it was Haruka’s:

_“Soon.”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come fangirl with me- un-bacio-dolce.tumblr.com  
> and also Haru rp blog- haru-swims-free.tumblr.com
> 
> ^_^


	5. Chapter 5

Soon, Haruka promised. Soon.

Nearly a week had passed since then, and Makoto was starting to think he’d been once again lied to.

For the most part he tried to keep himself busy, and his independent research project ensured he had plenty with which to occupy his time. If not at the aquarium, he could be found in the school library pouring through books and internet articles dedicated to the study of Spinner Dolphins. Within the first two days of diligent work he had more than enough to fill Professor Ryuugazaki’s project requirements, but the next two days saw him above and beyond what he knew would be a perfect score. And on the fifth day, a tired Wednesday, a book he’d purposefully avoided earlier finally gnawed at his subconscious effectively enough for him to pluck it from the shelf.

Nestled between _Marine Conservation Biology and Understanding the Ocean_ was a thin, leather-bound text, the title of which had faded with age. Discovering it had been an accident, and he was actually surprised the University library housed such a book. Subjects of fantasy had no place in an academic setting, right?

To his credit, he did not check the book out. The book would only pass a bit of time until he had to go to his advanced environmental history seminar. With that in mind, Makoto flipped to the unit dedicated to myths and magic of the sea.

There were stories he’d heard before – tales of Calypso and Neptune, of the dreaded Kraken and deceptive sirens. Makoto paid special attention to that section, trying to relate any of the information listed to what he’d gleaned of the _Sessa_. But the book mentioned nothing of the unique hierarchy he’d learned about from Rin, or the existence of a third gender, and while they did note the beauty of sirens their drawn depictions in no way did the actual creatures justice.

The second half of the unit was dedicated to magical spells associated with the ocean. Protective wards and enchantments to assure safe passage by sea, talismans and good omens for fishing.

 _A Call to Return to the Sea_ \- the headline of one of the final chapters – caused Makoto’s breath to hitch. A picture underneath the title showed a man whose body appeared human, but who seemed to have grown gills in order to exist below the waves.

_“Some research insists that humans evolved to live on land. With this thought, can we assume that creatures such as mermaids are in fact our ancestors? If so, is there any way for humankind to return to our ancient habitat of the sea?_

_While no concrete evidence exists to prove such a revolutionary feat, this author is hopeful. The following spells, collected from historical texts around the globe, boast of such powers to allow man to return where we most belong: beneath the waves.”_

Makoto closed the book forcefully and tossed it into the returns bin before he had the chance to talk himself out of doing so. Reading any further would only encourage false hope, and getting over such a hope once before had taken nearly three years. He didn’t know if he had the strength to go through it a second time.

So he went to class early, tried not to think about mermaids, or humans evolving from life under the sea, or the impossible idea of living happily ever after with Haruka. Real life did not work like the movies; it didn’t always have a fairytale ending. Makoto knew that. In the true story of The Little Mermaid, the mermaid died of grief and became the foam of the sea, doomed never to be with the one she loved.

Makoto had a life, family and friends and a prospective career ahead of him. He could be happy, if only he could let this go and give himself the chance.

That night, he tried to do just that. When he got a text from Nagisa exclaiming he and his enigmatic boyfriend were going to the movies and not-so-subtly hinting Makoto should do the same if he ever wanted to meet him, Makoto abandoned his sulking and changed into a form-fitting pair of jeans and nice shirt, and left the apartment before he could convince himself otherwise. A distraction was just the thing he needed, and he wouldn’t find that sitting at home by himself.

Living in a small town, especially near the university, had its advantages – namely, that every desirable location was within walking distance. The trek to the movie theatre took under ten minutes. The bigger cities had nicer theaters than Iwatobi’s, which housed only three screens and was in serious need of remodeling, but it still got all the main motion pictures and it was connected to a cute plaza with a café and a few restaurants, which created a nice social environment.

Nagisa sat at one of the café tables, sipping away at a strawberry milkshake. He jumped to his feet when he spotted Makoto, and began to wave his arms enthusiastically. “Over here, Mako-chan!”

Makoto didn’t need the invitation. His feet carried him assuredly over the cobblestones of the quaint plaza, but he stumbled and came up short as he realized who sat at the table with his friend. “P-Professor Ryuugazaki?”

The professor started, violet eyes widening comically behind his red-framed glasses. Obviously Nagisa hadn’t told him they would have company on their date, and Makoto felt not only bad for interrupting their time alone, but also awkward for having to approach a teacher in public. His skin prickled as a flush crept down his neck, and he debated whether or not he should bow. He took his cue from the professor, who gave a polite nod of the head in greeting.

“Eh?” The straw popped out from Nagisa’s mouth. “Rei-chan is your teacher?”

“Not so loud,” Professor Ryuugazaki – Rei – cried, scrambling to his feet. It was strange to see her without her stuffy teacher’s attire. In place of the drab pants and cardigans Makoto was used to, he wore a stylish pair of jeans and vest. Nagisa sent him a wicked grin, and Rei’s cheeks immediately flared.

Makoto would have pitied him, if not for the obvious affection in both their eyes. “He teaches marine biology, and I’m studying marine biology. It’s not that hard to put together, Nagisa.” In fact, he was sure that Nagisa had figured it out already. That was probably the main reason he wanted Makoto to be the first of his friends to meet his boyfriend. “It’s nice to see you, professor.”

Nagisa pulled a face. “Mako-chan, don’t be so formal! You should be friends. Call him Rei-chan.”

“Nagisa, I’m not going to call my professor _Rei-chan_.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine,” Nagisa insisted, waving protocol away with a dismissive hand.

Rei adjusted his glasses. “He’s right. If we’re out together like this, it’s kind of embarrassing if you address me so formally.”

Makoto remembered Nagisa telling him how worried Rei was about what people might think of him dating a student. The less attention drawn to Rei’s profession, the better, and since Rei himself was giving permission Makoto supposed he could learn to speak to him more casually when in public.  “If you say so, Rei.”

“Thank you. It’s nice to see you also, Mako-chan...san.”

A moment passed in complete silence, and then Nagisa burst out laughing. Rei blushed and crossed his arms over his chest while Makoto fought to keep his own grin at bay.

“Just Makoto is fine,” Makoto insisted.

“Rei-chan is _priceless_!” Nagisa crowed, pulling his boyfriend into his arms. They were about the same height, with Nagisa maybe an inch shorter, and they suited each other, even if their personalities seemed completely at odds.

Makoto wondered what Haruka would look like, if he stood at his side. Would they compliment each other? If he had legs, would Haruka be taller than Makoto, or would they fit together as they had before, with Haruka’s head at the perfect height to rest against his shoulder, and meet his lips with a faint tilt. Would Haruka like his friends? It was hard to imagine the merman joking and laughing with anyone, but Makoto knew firsthand that Haruka had a playful side. He liked to think Haruka and Nagisa would get along well, and Rei, having a PhD in marine biology, would be endlessly curious of Haruka.

Therein lay the problem. Makoto could never introduce Haruka to his friends, because such curiosity was dangerous. Even if Makoto trusted Rei to be respectful of the marine life he studied, not everyone was so virtuous.

Not that it mattered anyway, since Haruka wasn’t likely to return.

“Everything okay?”

Makoto focused back on the couple. They’d moved ahead of him, their free hands locking together in a discreet hold. Pushing his own feelings aside, he smiled. “It’s fine. What movie are we seeing?”

While Rei launched into a summary of the ratings and reviews of the current movies playing, Makoto ignored Nagisa’s prying gaze.

* * * *

In the end, Makoto’s willpower turned out to be pitifully weak. Knowing that Haruka was out there, swimming somewhere in Iwatobi Bay with Mieko and possibly Rin and the rest of his pod, Makoto could not keep himself away from the beach long.

Equipped with a flashlight and first-aid kit – in case Mieko had fallen victim to another shark net – Makoto found himself pacing along the shore after dark the vey next evening, eyes peeled for the slightest unnatural ripple among the waves. When he reached the rock he’d dubbed as his and Haruka’s, he was surprised to discover it occupied.

Mieko looked up as he approached, blue eyes brightening considerably as they landed on Makoto. Obviously recognizing him, the youngling chirped in delight and held up his arms. After a small bout of hesitation, Makoto sat down on the rock and let himself be hugged. Mieko’s long tail descended into the water, light purple scales reflecting the moonlight.

“I didn’t expect Haruka would let you come back here,” Makoto said, as Mieko nuzzled against his arm, subtly guiding Makoto to hold him. Pulled by brotherly instincts, Makoto relented and wrapped the young merman in his arms. “Does he know you’re here?” When Mieko pointedly looked away, Makoto took that as an answer in itself and heaved a sigh. “He’s not going to be happy with you.”

The first night Makoto came across Mieko, it had been obvious by Haruka’s frantic calls and the tension between the pair upon reuniting that the child was not where he was supposed to be. Makoto hadn’t the faintest idea if Sessa were the punishing sort, and if they were it wasn’t his place to question how others – especially another species – parented their children. The last thing he wanted was for Mieko to get in trouble.

“You should go back,” he said gently.

Mieko stubbornly shook his head, reminding Makoto of when Haruka first refused to return with Rin. There was no mistaking the relation there, and not for the first time Makoto wondered at the identity of Mieko’s mother. Being nearly the spitting image of Haruka, it was hard to piece together what the other parent might look like. The eyes were a different shape: downturned, and a bit wider set than Haruka’s. But they shared the same hypnotizing, crystal blue color.

Realizing he was staring, Makoto coughed. He tried to sharpen his features into that of a scolding adult, but the severity felt unnatural on him and soon melted away to a look of tired concern. “It’s not safe for you to be out here.”

There was no chance of Mieko understanding, but still he felt the need to convey his worries. For Haruka and Rin to breach the surface was one thing – and still not safe, as Rin had warned on every available opportunity. But they were adults, at least, and had ways to defend themselves. Looking over Mieko, Makoto could see the child hadn’t even grown into his teeth yet. Rather than Rin’s shark-like jaws or even Haruka’s small but razor-sharp teeth, Mieko’s teeth were rounded and blunt, like a normal human’s. 

When Mieko’s obstinate resolve still did not falter, Makoto tried a final time. “Don’t make your father worry.” Whatever animosity between them could be forgiven over time, and Haruka could surely take care of his child better than Makoto.

Mieko tipped his head to the side, nose scrunching. He whistled a few times, high and low, high and low. Then he opened his mouth.

“Faahhr.”

Makoto smiled apologetically. “I don’t know your word for it. Haruka.” Mieko still did not look like he understood, so, not for the first time, Makoto attempted Haruka’s calling sound. He wasn’t that great at whistling, and he didn’t think it would be recognizable at all to Mieko, but he weakly pushed the air through the small gap between his lips in what he hoped were the correct notes, adding the _click_ at the end.

Mieko blinked, and then dissolved into bubbling laughter. Makoto blushed, embarrassed but good-humored enough to laugh at himself. Despite his show of amusement, Mieko had apparently gotten Makoto’s meaning. He effortlessly repeated Haruka’s calling sound, and lurking in the depth of his blue eyes Makoto found a question: _How do you know him?_

Makoto hesitated only for a moment to pull the crystal tear necklace out from where it lived beneath his shirt. The instant the moon caught on the azure scale trapped within, Mieko gasped, and his tiny hands reached for it. He caressed the teardrop, and when his blue eyes met Makoto’s again they were filled with a strange recognition.

A soft voice reached his ears, and it took Makoto a beat to recognize it as Mieko speaking not in his typical clicks and whistles – which Makoto, quite incorrectly, assumed was all he knew at such a young age – but in the Sessa tongue. Makoto didn’t know the word, and couldn’t fathom what it translated to in Japanese, but saying it appeared to embolden Mieko. The child beat at the water with his tail and repeated the word a few times, punctuating every so often with Haruka’s identification sound.

“Mieko.” Makoto took hold of the boy’s arm, trying to calm him, but Mieko only bared his blunt teeth and hissed, anger primarily directed towards the water. Not knowing what else he could do, and fearful that Mieko might draw unwanted attention if he kept on shouting, Makoto hoisted the young merman out of the water and into his arms.

Mieko automatically fell silent, eyes growing wide as he registered that he was now fully out of the water – and moving even further away, as Makoto stood up. Makoto expected him to panic, to try and free himself and return to the ocean, to his home. But Mieko only wrapped his arms around Makoto’s neck and trembled silently. Makoto settled a hand against the small back, rubbing soothingly.

And then a bone shifted underneath his fingertips.

Makoto almost let go in his surprise and, as if sensing this unsettlement, Mieko clung tighter. A faint whimper escaped the boy’s lips as he pressed his forehead to Makoto’s chest, and Makoto scrambled for what he could do, how he could ease Mieko’s pain.

“Haruka.” Makoto whirled around, facing the bay and searching frantically for any sign of black hair or iridescent tailfin. “Haruka!”

Mieko began to squirm in earnest now, wriggling his tail desperately. There were tears in his eyes, and he looked at Makoto with such confusion and anxiety Makoto wanted nothing more than to assure him that everything would be all right. But he had no idea if that was true – had no idea what was even happening. Haruka had been fine when Makoto took him from the water. Being away from the sea had dehydrated him a bit, but as far as Makoto knew it never caused him this excruciating pain.

Makoto pet the boy’s hair, murmuring comforting words in his ear because that was all he could do. The first aid kid he’d brought was useless since there wasn’t a superficial wound. It was happening inside – twisting Mieko’s innards and rearranging them, splitting him apart and remaking him into something entirely different.

A short pair of legs wrapped around his waist, and Makoto suddenly knew what that something was.

Mieko was _human_.

* * * *

 _But not entirely human,_ he remembered later, once he’d returned to his apartment and calmed down some.

After Mieko’s tail morphed into a pair of legs, the child had promptly passed out from exhaustion. Makoto had waited on the beach for a time, hoping for Haruka or Rin or even an unfamiliar Sessa to surface and offer some kind of explanation. Even if they shunned Makoto and just took Mieko back with them, he wouldn’t have minded, because at least it meant Mieko would be properly looked after.

But no one came, and with little alternative options, Makoto took the boy back to his apartment. He didn’t bother filling the tub, because Mieko had legs now instead of a tail that needed constant moisturizing, and when he’d dressed the boy in an old T-shirt big enough to swallow Mieko’s whole body, he noticed Mieko’s gills had closed. The marks remained, but appeared to be nothing more than thin scars alongside his ribcage that had long since healed. 

Tomorrow he would return to the beach, and hopefully from there things would sort themselves out. Because Mieko wasn’t human, not really – or, at least, not entirely. He belonged in the ocean, with his parents and the rest of his kind. Even if he could sprout legs – for all Makoto knew, a talent possibly inherent to all his kind – there was no way he could live on land without a family to raise him.

Without his tail, Mieko looked exceptionally tiny, barely a toddler. He took up a small corner of Makoto’s bed, hardly visible underneath the blankets. Makoto’s heart went out to him, but left him under no delusion that he could actually take care of the child. He was young himself; had his school and own life to worry about. When he took Mieko back, placed him back in the water, with any luck whatever transformation occurred would be undone.

If not...

Well, Makoto didn’t want to think about that.

For now, there was nothing more he could do. Mieko was asleep, and the next day would bring a whole new world of troubles, so for the time being Makoto decided he’d earned a rest as well.

Careful not to wake Mieko, he climbed into bed beside him, and drifted off to the thought of what Haruka would look like if he too became human.

* * * *

Several hours later, he awoke to wet sheets and Mieko crying.

Makoto cursed himself for not thinking to put a towel or something else that might absorb water underneath the toddler, because even normal humans still had nighttime accidents at that age. Mieko, unaccustomed to a human bladder, couldn’t be blamed for what happened, and Makoto rushed to assure him, as he stripped the bed and got Mieko out of the damp clothes, that it wasn’t his fault.

Mieko tried to whistle, but it appeared Makoto was right in assuming how the Sessa produced the sound was different than how a human did. This failure did nothing to calm Mieko down. His cries increased in volume as he made another attempt, succeeding in little more than spitting.

Makoto wiped the saliva from his chin. “It’s okay, Mieko. Don’t worry.”

He gathered the boy in his arms and carried him to the bathroom, where he proceeded to wash him off with a damp cloth. Afraid submerging him in the bath might trigger Mieko into changing back into a merman, he figured a sponge bath the best option; taking a care of a human child would be easier for him than Mieko’s true form. But then, changing back to his normal body might comfort the child somewhat, and Makoto needed to see to the ruined bed sheets anyways, so after cleaning Mieko off he put the stopper in the drain and filled the tub up with several inches of water.

Mieko seemed pleased. His tears momentarily dried as he reached his hand in the warm water and, with very little ceremony, climbed in. Makoto held his breath, expecting the child to start screaming and writhing in pain as he had on the beach, but nothing happened. Mieko splashed his hands in the water, and seemed particularly interested in his new legs – wriggling his toes and giggling as the water slid between them.

Relieved, Makoto ruffled the boy’s hair. “I’ll be right back,” he promised.

His apartment didn’t come with much, but thankfully there was a stacked washer-dryer unit concealed in the hall closet. Makoto usually went to the Laundromat since the unit didn’t hold much and running it tended to rack up his electrical and water bills, but for right now it was a Godsend. He stuffed the urine-soaked sheets into the machine and added a generous amount of detergent.

The sound of Mieko playing in the bathroom made him smile. It reminded him of how much he enjoyed taking care of his siblings when they were little, and he wished he had any kids toys he could offer Mieko. At the very least, he could bring the boy something to eat.

Recalling Haruka’s affinity for canned fish, Makoto figured that would be the best choice. He pulled a can of mackerel from the pantry and returned to the bathroom with that and a glass of milk.

Mieko was on his back in the shallow water, one of his toes in his mouth. He pulled himself upright when he spotted Makoto, making happy, unintelligible sounds, and dropped his foot back into the water.

“Here,” Makoto said, offering the can of fish. “You might like this better.”

Cautiously Mieko sniffed the can, and then took it carefully. He was more hesitant to eat it than Haruka had been, though he seemed to enjoy it well enough. He quickly abandoned it in when he caught sight of the milk. Makoto watched in dismay as chopped mackerel bits fell into the tub, now inedible, but Mieko paid no mind. He sucked at the lip of the glass in a very obvious way, making Makoto doubt that he’d been properly weaned yet. Mieko seemed a bit old to still be feeding from his mother, but perhaps it was different for the Sessa.

Gently, Makoto helped Mieko to drink from the glass without spilling too much of the milk. The taste clearly wasn’t what Mieko was accustomed to, for more than once he threw the glass a dubious look, but he drained the contents nevertheless. Once finished, Makoto fished him out of the water and toweled him dry, rinsing down the tub only after he’d changed Mieko into a fresh shirt.

To preoccupy the child while he changed the sheets, Makoto tried to offer him knickknacks from his room – a trophy from his high school soccer team, one of his textbooks – but Mieko seemed interested in only one thing: Makoto’s necklace. He held it reverently when Makoto handed it to him, staring lovingly at the scale trapped within. Makoto wondered where his anger, which the necklace seemed to have triggered before, had disappeared. Not that he minded.

As Makoto busied himself with making the bed, he heard the despondent would-be whistle oaruka’s name.

“Haruka,” he said gently. Mieko lifted his head from where he’d laid down on the floor. “Try saying it. Haruka.”

Mieko blinked, then looked down at the stone in his hands. “Ahroo-kaah.”

Makoto smiled, stuffing a pillow into a pillowcase. “Or maybe I should teach you to say ‘papa.’”

“Paah,” Mieko repeated softly. “Ahroo... paah.”

Mieko said the words over and over, voice growing fainter until Makoto finally looked over and discovered the toddler had fallen asleep, the necklace pressed up against his heart. Carefully, Makoto scooped Mieko up and settled him back down on the freshly made bed. He’d made sure this time around to keep Mieko’s side padded with towels to soak up any future accidents Mieko might have. Before he pulled away to his own side of the bed, he kissed the silky black hair, so much like Haruka’s. “Goodnight, Mieko.”

Mieko murmured incoherently in his sleep, Makoto catching only what sounded like “paah,” and curled closer to him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't be afraid to harass me on tumblr~ un-bacio-dolce (personal but pretty much all Free lol) and haru-swims-free (RP blog)! And also feel free to ask any questions you might have if this is your first time reading it (all the rest of you know what happens :P )


	6. Chapter 6

“Wow! He looks a lot like you, Makoto.”

He hadn’t wanted to.

He really, really hadn’t wanted this to happen.

When morning came, Makoto texted Nagisa that he was sick and wouldn’t be going to school. Any normal person would have simply wished for him to get well soon and went on with their day. But Nagisa came banging on the door some twenty minutes later armed with a goody bag of what he dubbed “staying home sick must-haves” – which included store-bought chicken noodle soup, tea, ibuprofen, and a stack of romantic comedy DVDs.

All pretenses flew out the window when Mieko, rather unsteady on his legs, crawled into the room, and Nagisa shrieked in delight. Not used to improvising, Makoto stammered out what he hoped was a believable lie about Mieko being his paternal uncle’s son. Thankfully Nagisa hadn’t pried for too many details, although Makoto should have known from the wicked gleam in the blond’s eyes that Nagisa would stay quiet about any suspicions.

Currently Mieko sat with Nagisa, quietly studying the new face. Makoto hesitated before replying, afraid of where his friend might take the conversation. “Y-you think so?” He honestly hadn’t noticed any similarities, but that was probably because he was too blinded by the clear resemblance to Haruka.

Nagisa nodded enthusiastically, bouncing Mieko on his knee. Mieko swung his legs happily. “Yeah. He’s got your cute droopy eyes, and the same mouth.” He frowned suddenly. “It’s weird. I always thought you looked like your mom, but I guess some of those traits run in your dad’s side of the family, too.”

Makoto forced a laugh that sounded nervous even to his own ears. “Guess so,” he agreed, unsure of what else to say considering Mieko rightfully shouldn’t share any traits with his family.

“Ah – look, look!” Nagisa pointed to the bridge of Mieko’s nose, whereupon close inspection revealed a faint smattering of freckles. “Just like you.”

Makoto rubbed at his own nose, where his freckles were known to appear whenever he spent too much time in the sun.

Nagisa winked slyly at him. “Are you sure you’re not hiding anything from me?”

Blushing, Makoto shot to his feet. “Nagisa! That’s—” Impossible. Completely, utterly impossible. “ _No_!”

“Oh, come on. It’s not like you’re a virgin. You don’t really sleep around, but it’s totally possible.” Nagisa’s eyes lit up, as if he’d slid the final piece of the puzzle into place. “Didn’t you have a serious girlfriend three years ago? Oh, what was her name? Cute brunette.”

“He doesn’t look anything like Chigusa.” As he said it, Makoto wasn’t sure whether he meant to defend his ex-girlfriend or Haruka. Hanamura Chigusa was a kind person, and she’d been a thoughtful girlfriend; they’d parted on good terms, and Makoto had no desire to slander her name by insinuating he’d knocked her up in high school. To say Mieko resembled Chigusa, however, was equally insulting. Chigusa was cute, but Haruka was beautiful. “He takes after his father. My... uncle.”

Nagisa did not look convinced. He ran a hand through Mieko’s soft hair, lips pursed. “This wouldn’t have anything to do with Haruka, would it?”

Makoto blanched. He’d hoped Nagisa would have forgotten about that conversation by now, but just as he’d feared the imp had only stored the information to fire back at him later. Before he could even try to deny it, Mieko tilted his head back, a grin lighting up his face.

“Paah!” Mieko seemed to have retained the small language lesson Makoto had given him. He pointed to Makoto’s neck, where hung the crystalized teardrop, then clambered onto Makoto’s lap and reached for it. “Ahroo paah!”

Unable to resist, Makoto pulled the necklace out. Mieko squealed and cupped the small stone in his fingers, peering at the azure scale.

“This belongs to Haruka, hm?” Nagisa drawled, as Mieko enthusiastically showed him the necklace. “I’m guessing that’s not the only thing, though.” He jabbed at Makoto’s arm. “Explain.”

Makoto hesitated. He couldn’t tell Nagisa the truth – but he wanted to. Carrying that secret on his own was a tremendous burden, but he didn’t know if he could trust Nagisa not to blab it to Rei or the rest of the school. His shoulders sagged. “Okay, you win,” he relented. “Mieko is Haruka’s son.” If he told at least half the truth, it might get him off the hook.

Wishful thinking.

Nagisa turned the necklace over in his hand, the scale catching the artificial light in the room and shining brilliantly. “And what else?”

“N-nothing else.” Damn his nervous stutter.

Nagisa’s expression turned positively wolfish as Mieko pointed to the scale and whispered, “Ahroo.”

Makoto fidgeted. “Nagisa...” Mieko crawled back into his lap, nuzzling gently at his chest and humming quietly things that may have made sense to another Sessa. Makoto wrapped his arms around the boy, forcing down the horror of anything happening to him. This was _Nagisa._ He’d never do anything to hurt Mieko – or anyone, for that matter.

_But it’s not him I need to worry about._

Sensing the mood, Nagisa’s smile vanished.  “Just be honest with me, Makoto.” His eyes softened. “You know you can tell me anything.”

The words trickled slowly at first, and then very suddenly tumbled like a tidal wave over a busted dam. Makoto confessed how he’d found Haruka on the beach those three years ago, how he’d thought him injured and took him back to the apartment. How, after he’d returned Haruka to the beach, he’d met another of his kind. How Haruka gave him the tear-stone and scale in parting, and how Makoto waited all this time for him to return even though it seemed like Haruka wanted nothing more to do with him. How he’d found Mieko on the beach, both earlier in the week and the night before.

He did not tell Nagisa about the sex. That was a little too personal, not to mention the perfect ammunition for Nagisa to blackmail him for the rest of his life. But he was sure his emotions still came through without adding that bit of information.

When Makoto was finished, panting a little from the exertion of releasing it all at once, Nagisa leaned back against the sofa. “ _Wow_ ,” he breathed.

Makoto swallowed the feeling that he’d just made a giant mistake. He could trust Nagisa; he _had to_ trust Nagisa. “You can’t tell anyone.”

“I’m not sure anyone would even believe me.” Uncertain of himself, Nagisa had fallen back on his cheerful and teasing persona. “It sounds crazy.”

Makoto rounded on him, eyes narrowed and completely serious this time. “I mean it, Nagisa. I shouldn’t have even told you. I promised I wouldn’t tell anyone. It’s dangerous for anyone to know about them. They’d be hunted down. Used for experiments and God knows what else.” His arms tightened around Mieko, who heaved a content sigh, oblivious to the severity of the situation. “I can’t let that happen.”

Nagisa looked from him to Mieko, then nodded resolutely. “I won’t say anything,” he promised. “But...” His voice trailed off, and he seemed to be searching for the right words. Makoto wanted to laugh at the idea of Nagisa, who took a sick kind of pleasure tormenting and embarrassing him day to day, suddenly trying to spare his feelings. “You know you can’t keep this up, right? Mi-chan doesn’t belong here, and neither does your Haruka.”

“I know,” Makoto said, a bit more forcefully than necessary. He sighed. “I know that. I just...”

_How can I say goodbye again?_

Offering him a smile, Nagisa clapped his shoulder. “I’ll help you,” he promised. “Just say the word and I’ll do whatever you need me to.”

"Thank you, Nagisa." Makoto wasn't exactly sure if he could ask Nagisa to do anything besides keep his mouth shut at this point, but it was nice to hear Nagisa was willing to take on such responsibility, should he ask it. "You're a good friend."

Nagisa grinned and flashed a thumb's-up. "Of course I am."

And from there, the subject dropped. Nagisa went on to talk about how Rei really enjoyed getting to know Makoto outside of the classroom, and then proceeded to divulge far more information than Makoto would have liked to know about their sex life. Apparently Rei was really studious about angles, and knew just the degree to tilt his head and exact amount of pressure to apply when - well, Makoto tuned out there, and fastidiously clamped his hands over Mieko's ears to spare the boy's innocence. Not that Mieko would know a conversation about foreplay from a nursery rhyme, but still, as current guardian Makoto felt it his duty to shelter him.

"It's not like he knows. He'll learn it all soon enough, anyways. Sea creatures are very sexual," Nagisa said, as if that justified anything.

"He's a baby."

"So? His dad is leader of the pod, from what you said. He probably has loads of sex. Mi-chan’s probably been exposed already."

Even though it was obvious by this point that Haruka had moved on and probably taken another partner, Makoto did not want to think about him having sex with anyone else - especially opening himself up so intimately, as he had done for Makoto, revealing the secrets of his gender. "Can we not talk about this?"

"Oh, are you jealous?” Nagisa leaned over to whisper conspiratorially in Mieko's ear. "Makoto L-O-V-E-S your papa, Mi-chan."

"Paah," Mieko agreed.

_"...Of three shark attacks within seven hours."_

The television had been playing quietly in the background since Nagisa's arrival, but that was the first snippet of the morning news to capture Makoto's attention. He held a hand up to silence Nagisa before his friend could continue on with corrupting poor Mieko, and grabbed the remote from where it rested on the floor. The reporter stood on the stretch of beach near Makoto's apartment, by the docks, wearing a solemn expression as she spoke about the first victim of the three attacks - a sixteen-year-old swimmer who'd been training at sunrise for an upcoming competition.

_"The wound wasn't fatal, but he has been taken to Iwatobi General..."_

As the story continued into the second attack, it immediately became clear that the third would be even worse. Where the sixteen-year-old swimmer only needed a few stitches, the second victim, an elderly woman, lost a good chunk of her upper arm. The wound hadn't been deadly, but the intent had definitely been to harm.

 _"As she was taken away, we heard her saying something about a tail - a red tail. Don't know of any sharks with a red tail,"_ one interviewed beachgoer said, crossing his arms anxiously.

The reporter did not go into much detail about the third victim, as it had been a young child, but she did assure her audience the child was in surgery and give hope for a swift recovery.

Makoto leaned back against the sofa, unsettled and growing even more so as the reporter turned to interview a local marine authority.

_"We have several witnesses claiming to have seen a red tail, and from what we know of the wounds the bite radius seems relatively small - especially on the first victim - to belong to any of the species of sharks we're used to finding in our waters. Do you think it's possible that a new species has migrated to us, and what the reason for that might be?"_

Of course the authorities had no helpful information to offer. Whatever concerns they might have had were swept under the rug as the uniformed man assured the reporter and audience that, while the attacks were unusual, especially considering the time of year, Iwatobi had nothing to worry about.

_"Precautions are being made in the form of more shark nets, and more patrols at night. If there is a new species infesting the water - and I highly doubt it - it will be brought to the surface in no time."_

The sick feeling in the pit of Makoto's stomach rose up to his throat. 

He knew _exactly_ who caused those attacks, and for what reason. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cry with me about Free! being over: un-bacio-dolce . tumblr . com & haru-swims-free . tumblr . com


	7. Chapter 7

“So, what’s the plan?” Nagisa asked conversationally, after Makoto finished settling Mieko in the bedroom for a nap. He remained where Makoto left him on the sofa, only now his legs were tucked up under his body and he leaned precariously over the edge like an overanxious child on his first rollercoaster.

“What are you talking about?”

Nagisa made a show of rolling his eyes. “The plan,” he repeated. “To get Mi-chan back to the ocean and reunite with your one true love?”

Makoto scratched at the back of his neck, heat creeping into his cheeks. He honestly hadn’t given much thought to it. Initially he figured he would just return Mieko to the beach the same way he’d done with Haruka, in the middle of the night when they weren’t likely to be interrupted. Now, thanks to the supposed shark attacks, things weren’t so simple. There would be news teams and patrols on the beach to worry about, not to mention meddling civilians hoping to either get their fifteen seconds of fame standing behind a reporter.

As for reuniting with Haruka… Well, there wasn’t even a point to thinking about that. Haruka made his feelings – or lack thereof - perfectly clear, and pining wouldn’t change anything. All Makoto could do was return Mieko to where he belonged and go about his life as before: trying ineffectually to keep all thoughts of the Sessa from his mind. Now that he had a definite answer about his and Haruka’s relationship, maybe there was a chance he could actually move on.

“It’s going to be hard to get him to the beach unnoticed,” Makoto said, reclining on the sofa with his arms behind his head. “I could bring him to another beach, but what if they’re not looking for him there?”

“You think they’re looking for him? Isn’t it usually after a certain age, animals abandon their young?”

That may have been true for other species, but not the Sessa – at least, not for Haruka. The worry in Haruka’s eyes the first time he found Mieko on the beach spoke of how precious Haruka’s son was to him. Makoto shook his head. “They’re definitely looking. Or Rin is, at the very least.”

Nagisa screwed up his face as he tried to recall the bits and pieces of the story Makoto relayed to him earlier. “Rin was... Haruka’s other mate?” He waited for confirmation, and then whistled lowly. “You’ve gotten yourself into quite the mess, haven’t you, Mako-chan?”

Makoto groaned. “Don’t remind me.” Rin and Haruka’s relationship was the least of his concerns. Actually, considering his and Haruka’s future prospects, it shouldn’t be a concern at all. What mattered was getting Mieko back to his father. “I think it was Rin who attacked those people. The last two, at least.” Having been a victim of Rin’s teeth himself, Makoto had been able to tell the subtle differences between the pictures the news showed of the first bite to the wound Rin inflicted on his own leg three years ago. The first bite was smaller in circumference, and the teeth themselves left tinier imprints. “The first might have been Haruka.”

Nagisa gasped. “Mako-chan likes rough partners.” He smirked, and Makoto wondered how all of their conversations led back to such topics. “Who would have guessed?”

Makoto couldn’t even refute the comment, because at one point in their lovemaking, he remembered, Haruka _had_ bitten him – and he’d liked it very much. Not that Nagisa needed to know that. “You’re missing the point,” he said.

Nagisa giggled. “I think _you’re_ missing a point as well, and that point belongs to someone’s _paah_.” He pitched his voice higher on the last word to mimic Mieko’s voice, and the color drained from Makoto’s face.

“Please don’t talk like that.” It was disturbing enough that even at his height Nagisa could impersonate a child, but to intentionally try to sound like Haruka’s child, who slept innocently in the next room, brought it to an entirely new level.

As if sensing he’d crossed a line, Nagisa held his hands up apologetically. “Sorry. Forgot what a sheltering father you were.”

“He’s not my—” Makoto huffed, frustrated, and ran a hand through his hair. He needed to calm down. “He’s not my son. That’s impossible.”

“Oh, come on. I know you haven’t owned up to it, and _I_ don’t even want the details of how it worked, but you and Haruka definitely fucked. You wouldn’t feel so strongly about him if you hadn’t.”

Makoto chose not to comment on that. If he blatantly admitted to having sex with Haruka, Nagisa would never let it go. Not to mention it would spark a curious round of questions Makoto barely had answers to himself, and wouldn’t want to divulge even if he did. What happened between him and Haruka was special, and he didn’t want to tarnish the memory by sharing it with anyone, not even his best friend.

Physical impossibilities aside, there was one other reason Makoto just couldn’t accept being the father of Haruka’s child. “He wouldn’t have kept that from me.”

Nagisa’s expression softened, the teasing smile fading from his lips. He placed a hand on Makoto’s shoulder. “Maybe he couldn’t tell you,” he said. “Maybe someone wouldn’t let him.”

Makoto thought of the way Haruka reacted when Rin said Haruka shouldn’t swim in too shallow of water, and immediately dismissed the idea. Even if Rin and Haruka were close, no one made Haruka do something he didn’t want to do. “It would have been his own choice.”

“Then I’m sure he had a reason for it.”

“It was easier for everyone to keep me in the dark,” Makoto said, frowning. “I would have wanted to see him – to be there for him, and how could I?” It was too complicated, too heartbreaking, the thought that he had a family he could never be a part of. But it also made some things make sense, such as Mieko’s draw to the shore, and to Makoto himself. It also explained Haruka’s distance; if he wanted to keep Mieko from meeting him, he would have to stay away himself.

_He didn’t want Mieko leaving him. Choosing me. He didn’t want either of us to know._

Makoto could understand that, because in the same way he selfishly wished he could keep Haruka – and now Mieko, if he truly was his son – with him forever. But understanding did little to ease the heavy weight on his heart. Three years... _three years_ he’d potentially had a son, and if not for Mieko’s inherited stubbornness Makoto might have gone the rest of his life without knowing.

He wouldn’t believe it until he heard the truth from Haruka’s lips.

“We should go shopping.”

Makoto blinked at the sudden change of topic. “What?”

“Shopping,” Nagisa said, as if that was the most obvious thing they should be doing. At the dubious look Makoto sent him, he motioned towards the bedroom. “Mi-chan can’t wear your big shirts all day long. And unless you feel like spending all your spare time doing laundry, we should probably get him some diapers or something. They make diapers for his size, right?”

Makoto shrugged helplessly. “He’s not staying, so what does it matter?”

“Well, it will make it a lot less conspicuous to carry him around in clothes that fit him.”

In the end Makoto couldn’t argue against that logic, and a little over an hour later they were traversing the aisles of a department store, probably the oddest-looking ‘family’ to ever set foot inside. Already their situation had been misinterpreted by two sales associates – one who assumed Mieko was Makoto’s younger sibling, and another who congratulated them on adopting and told them in a hushed whisper she fiercely supported gay rights.

Nagisa, although happily in favor of pretending to be a couple, had been able to easily dispel the awkward comments with a laugh. “We’re not together,” he told the woman. “Mi-chan is his. I’m just being a good friend and helping him shop, because Mako-chan is hopeless.”

The first order of business was diapers, which they were able to find in an appropriate size. Getting them on Mieko was another matter entirely. Having had a fins his entire life, Mieko obviously wasn’t accustomed to having his body restricted in any way, and he fought Makoto the entire time – kicking his legs and screaming in protest, making Makoto very glad he’d decided to change him in the bathroom where at least there was a semblance of privacy.

Luckily, Makoto had training in this department. His little sister Ran had gone through a stage in her Terrible Twos where she obstinately refused to wear clothes. Dressing her in the morning had been a test on both his physical and mental capabilities, and actually seeing she stayed dressed a near impossibility. With that experience under his belt, he was able to expertly pin Mieko’s ankles with one hand and finagle the diaper under his wiggling bottom with the other.

“Almost done,” he cooed, taping up the sides of the diaper one-handed. “Good job, Mieko. See?” He picked Mieko up and stood him on shaky feet. The toddler sniveled and squirmed and almost wrenched himself out of Makoto’s arms. “Now you just need some clothes on and we’ll be ready to go. Hopefully Nagisa’s picked something out by now.”

Indeed, Nagisa had amassed an entire shopping cart’s worth of clothes, from onesies and sleepers to bathing suits with matching sunhats. Certainly far more than necessary for the one or two nights max that Mieko would stay in Makoto’s custody.

“I think it’s a bit much,” Makoto admitted, returning a formal blue button-up to the appropriate rack.

Nagisa deflated, jutting out his bottom lip in an exaggerated pout. “But you never know what might happen. It could come in handy.”

“I really don’t think he’ll need a suit.”

With a sigh, Nagisa relented.

Makoto settled on a pair of blue-and-green striped swim trunks, which were easy enough to slide up Mieko’s legs while Nagisa held the child up by the armpits.

Mieko whined in protest, calling out, “paah! Ahroo paah!”

“We’ll see Haruka later,” Makoto promised, before pulling the matching blue shirt down over Mieko’s head. Mieko wasn’t thrilled with the momentary darkness and attempted to whistle and free his arms, but eventually they succeeded in wrestling the shirt on.

“Aw, look how cute,” Nagisa gushed, pointing at the three cartoon dolphins on the front of the shirt.

“It is pretty cute,” Makoto agreed, hoisting Mieko back into his arms. “I thought Haruka was a dolphin when I first saw him.” Mieko tilted his head to the side, and as usual to hold his attention and keep him calm, Makoto presented him with the necklace. He clipped it around Mieko’s thin neck.

“Look, there’s one for each of you,” Nagisa said, pointing to each of the dolphins. “Small for Mi-chan, medium for Haruka, and large for Makoto.”

Makoto stopped himself from entertaining the idea of living with Haruka and Mieko as a family and grabbed another two outfits from the cart to bring with him just in case. That plus the diapers should be enough to take care of Mieko. “Oh, a bottle,” he remembered as they neared the checkout.

Nagisa raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t he a bit old for a bottle?”

“He’s had a bit of a hard time with normal cups. It’ll probably be easier to feed him from what he’s more used to.”

Once he added a box set of two bottles to his cart, he proceeded to the checkout. A different saleswoman from the two they’d met earlier rung up the items, enthusing all the while over Mieko’s outfit and how nice it was to see a stay-at-home father for once.

“He’s got your eyes, daddy.” She winked at him. “Pretty blue, though. That must be his mother’s.”

Makoto didn’t have the energy to correct her.

As soon as they were out of the store, Nagisa carrying the bags while Makoto carried Mieko, Nagisa piped up. “I’ve actually been wondering about that.”

They turned out of the shopping plaza and began the trek back to Makoto’s apartment. “About what?”

Nagisa chewed on his lip, taking his time in choosing his phrasing. “If you’re really Mi-chan’s father, that would make Haruka the mother.”

“And...” Makoto’s voice trailed off as he waited for the inevitable continuation.

“Well, from what you’ve told me, Haruka isn’t female. So how does that work?” Nagisa turned sly magenta eyes on him. “I have a feeling you haven’t been entirely truthful with me.”

They stopped at a traffic light and Makoto purposefully avoided his friend’s gaze. “I don’t know. I told you it was impossible.”

That was something that hadn’t occurred to him, but then the secrets of Haruka’s gender wasn’t anything he’d been able to figure out even after three years. Maybe Haruka could carry a child, even while still physically appearing male. “Nagisa,” he said, when the blond opened his mouth to goad him further. “If you don’t mind, I’d really rather not talk about it. Let’s just focus on getting Mieko home.”

Nagisa cast a sympathetic look to him and ruffled Mieko’s hair. “Okay.”

At Nagisa’s prompting, they took the long way back to the apartment in order to scope out the situation at the beach. There were still a few news crews loitering by the water, but not much reporting happening, and despite the beach being fenced off there was a multitude of bystanders.

Mieko’s attention shifted automatically to the water. Makoto had been afraid that being so close to the beach might trigger a violent response in the child – that Mieko might start crying for Haruka or try to get out of Makoto’s arms to get back to the water. Aside from stretching a hand out towards the waves, however, Mieko was still, not even lifting his head from where it rested on Makoto’s shoulder.

“Ahroo...”

Makoto patted Mieko’s back soothingly. “You’ll see him soon,” he said. “I promise.”

* * * *

“I have a plan!”

Makoto shouldered his phone against his ear so he could towel Mieko off. Despite curiosity about the shore, love of water was obviously something that could not be taken from a Sessa. Not long after Nagisa left that afternoon Mieko had wanted right back in the bath, and he’d stayed there for an hour at least, not minding even when the water cooled and his skin began to prune. Now he was starting to get fussy, probably hungry.

“Let’s hear it,” Makoto said. Putting a fresh diaper on Mieko while keeping hold of the phone was a challenge, but Makoto managed, and he decided a diaper was sufficient for now. Mieko seemed happy enough to forego a shirt.

“Okay, okay. So. I’m thinking you should try and rendezvous with Haruka. Tell him about the situation and why it’s not safe for you to bring Mi-chan back yet. Then you’ll wait a few days, until the excitement of the shark attacks dies down, and you can bring Mi-chan back.”

“I’m beginning to think you just want an excuse to keep Mieko here longer.” Makoto watched Mieko toddle down the hall, supporting himself up by holding on to the wall. He smiled affectionately at the boy. Honestly, he wouldn’t mind Mieko staying longer, but he couldn’t worry Haruka and Rin like that. “If I’m taking the chance going to see Haruka, there’s no reason I shouldn’t bring Mieko with me. Either way it’s a risk.”

“But would you really want to risk Mi-chan?”

Makoto knew the answer already. _No._ Haruka was an adult; he knowingly took a risk every time he breached the surface, and he had ways to defend himself. Mieko did not, and if he was ever captured not only would Haruka never forgive him, but Makoto would never be able to live with himself.

“So I’ll come over around ten.” He could practically hear the smile in Nagisa’s voice. “Mi-chan should be asleep, but you need someone to watch over him in case anything happens.”

Makoto followed closely behind Mieko until they reached the small kitchen/living room. He picked Mieko up and dumped him on the sofa. “I guess I’ll see you then.” There was no point in arguing, and he supposed Nagisa’s idea had some good points. It allowed him the chance to see Haruka, at any rate. Not that anything could really come of it, considering the circumstances.

After hanging up with Nagisa, he flicked on the television to the children’s network and then busied himself with preparing a bottle. The bottles had definitely been a wise purchase. Not only did they equal less spilling, but also Mieko seemed comforted by them. Makoto had to wonder what it meant. If Nagisa’s suspicions were true and Makoto truly was Mieko’s father, then that meant Haruka had birthed him. And how could Mieko nurse from Haruka?

He sat on one end of the sofa and watched Mieko suck from the bottle some ten minutes later. Mieko’s blue eyes were closed and he’d rolled onto his back, holding the bottle with one hand and lazily playing with the teardrop necklace with the other.

_It doesn’t make any sense._

But really, what did make sense about any of this? Since Haruka first appeared in his life, nothing had made very much sense at all.

* * * *

True to his word, Nagisa showed up exactly at ten. With Mieko fast asleep there wasn’t anything to keep Makoto from saying a quick farewell and slipping out of the apartment building – though, just as he’d feared, getting to the beach proved more difficult than usual. Thanks to Rin and the mistaken shark attacks, a police barricade manned by several officers who clearly wished they were elsewhere had been constructed to keep away nighttime swimmers. Makoto didn’t even bother trying to get past them. Instead, he followed the barricade from a safe distance away where hopefully the officers wouldn’t notice him – they looked to be in conversation, so that was lucky – for roughly a mile, until his usual spot by the pier and the site of the attacks were well behind him. This section of the beach wasn’t guarded as far as he could see, and nothing came along to impede his path down to the water.

The Sessahad a keen sense of smell. Makoto didn’t know just how keen, but he did hope the water might carry whatever sort of natural scent they distinguished as human and bring one of them to him. He didn’t wander too far out, just in case an unfamiliar Sessaappeared and picked up where Rin left off with his last victim.

He walked aimlessly through the waist-deep water, a light current fighting against his progression, as his eyes roamed choppy bay. There were no immediate signs of any Sessanearby, something that both worried and relieved Makoto. On one hand it meant that Haruka and Rin knew something of the situation, and how it would be hazardous to venture too close to shore now more than ever; but on the other hand, Makoto could not bring himself to return Mieko to the ocean without knowing if any of his kind would even be there to receive him. He could not abandon a child to the sea – especially not Haruka’s child.

There was nothing to do but wait. Having already walked so far, and after having taken care of a human/merman child all day, he was tired, and so he tromped back up to shallower water to heavily sit. The tide lapped up over him, and he was thankful he’d actually remembered to put swim trunks on before leaving the house.

“Haruka,” he called softly. The reflection of the moon winked at him from the water, playing tricks on his eyes. In each shimmer of the waves he thought he spied a fluke, in every white cap the graceful arc of Haruka’s arm breaking the surface. “I don’t know if you can hear me, but I need your help. Mieko... I don’t know what to do with him.” He frowned. “I can’t take care of him like you can.”

In the distance, he noticed a dark shape moving rapidly – most likely a coast guard’s boat.

“I know you want nothing to do with me, but please. For him...”

His voice trailed off. It wasn’t just for Mieko and he knew it. He wanted to see Haruka because _he_ missed him, because Haruka had promised him that soon they would meet again.

He was selfish. Pathetic. No wonder Haruka kept his distance.

Something slapped against his leg, slippery and cool, and the next thing Makoto knew he was being roughly seized by the arms and thrown to the side. He sputtered, saltwater rushing into his mouth and choking him. A weight settled over his stomach, threatening to push him down. All of Makoto’s old fears came rushing to the forefront of his mind, paralyzing him.

“Stop,” he managed to get out between violent coughs. “Please— _Haruka_!”

“ _You_!”

Sharp nails dug into his biceps and hauled Makoto back up. Once Makoto’s vision adjusted he recognized the wide crimson eyes and the lips pulled back in a truly impressive snarl. “Rin,” he breathed in relief.

Rin did not appear pleased with their reunion. “I should have known you would take him. Humans are all the same – thieves, the whole species!”

Makoto didn’t fight his rage, barely even lifted a finger to detach the claw-like fingers from his arms. “Rin – Rin, calm down!”

“Not until you bring him back,” Rin shouted.

“I can’t.” At his distressed tone, Rin eased up on his grip. Makoto tried to explain everything that happened, how he found Mieko on the beach and the way the entire town was up in arms about the supposed shark attacks. “I couldn’t just bring him back to the beach, not with all the news crews. What if someone spotted him changing? And I didn’t know if you or Haruka would be here. I couldn’t leave him alone.”

“You shouldn’t have taken him from here to begin with,” Rin pointed out.

Guilt stung Makoto. “I didn’t know what else to do.”

“That’s the same excuse you used with Haru, and it’s just as stupid now as it was then. You should just leave us alone!”

Cheeks burning with shame, Makoto hung his head. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize to me. Haru’s beside himself. This is what he’s been afraid of since—” Rin cut off unexpectedly, and Makoto had the feeling that, as a human, he was not worthy of hearing the rest.

“Since what?”

Rin clenched his jaw, his eyes narrowing. “Listen, human. Haru may have... _claimed_ you, but that doesn’t make you one of us.”

“I never said I was.”

“Then don’t act like I need to tell you anything.”

Makoto shook his head. “I just want to know if Haruka’s okay. If he... if he doesn’t want anything to do with me, that’s fine. But he acted so strange with me, and I just want to know why.”

“If only he wanted nothing to do with you,” Rin scoffed, and Makoto’s expression brightened.

“He doesn’t hate me, then?”

Rin crossed his arms over his chest. “I told you already that Haru’s choosy about his mates. You think he would discard someone he thought worthy, so quickly? You think he’s that fickle?”

Makoto raised his hands in submission. “I didn’t mean it like that.” The last thing he wanted to deal with was an angry Rin. At the mere idea, his leg throbbed with the memory of sharp teeth tearing into flesh. “I just—he disappeared for so long. And then he was so distant.”

“Listen.” Rin swam up close so that their chests nearly brushed, his strange eyes boring into Makoto. Makoto swallowed audibly but could not look away. While not nearly as entrancing, Rin’s eyes seemed to share Haruka’s ability to captivate their audience entirely. “Our species shouldn’t mix. Haru knew that, but he chose you anyways. There are some – a lot of the pod doesn’t like it. Think it’s bad luck, especially since—” He cut off again.

Tentatively, Makoto laid a hand on Rin’s shoulder. “Since what?”

Rin shrugged his arm away. “Haru is _Sessmalla_. They are supposed to be healthy and strong, models of our kind. Haru is... strong, in his way, but he has never been very healthy.”

Fear pricked at Makoto’s heart. “Is he sick?”

“Not him,” Rin began, sounding reluctant. He cut a glance to the open sea. “His children.”

Makoto thought of Mieko, peacefully sleeping miles away. The boy hadn’t seemed ill, but that did Makoto know of it? Despite appearing human, there was no denying where Mieko came from. If he did have some kind of disease known only among the Sessa, Makoto would never be able to tell.

“None of Haru’s children have made it to term,” Rin continued. “The children he’s sired are weak and die before they’re even weaned from their mothers. The night that you found him...”

Makoto had been trying to wrap his mind around the idea of Haruka already being a parent when the memory came rushing back: Haruka lying so still in the sand, covered in blood – so much blood. A cold weight settled over Makoto. “Don’t tell me that...”

“It was young. Barely formed inside of him.”

Rin’s voice was strained, his eyes tight, and Makoto instantly knew all the words Rin did not say. “It was yours.” If anything happened to his siblings he was sure his world would fall apart. He couldn’t even imagine losing a child.

 _But if Mieko really is mine, I will lose him._ Lose him to the ocean, or to whatever disease might have already claimed him.

Makoto curled his hands into fists. “I’m so sorry, Rin. I had no idea.”

Rin tried to glare, but the expression fell short of intimidating. “It was young,” he said again, as if that made the loss any less painful. “Haru had barely even gained weight yet.”

“It was still your child.”

A darkness passed over Rin’s eyes – shadows of the past that he probably never dealt with properly. Rin seemed the sort to bottle the more painful emotions. Makoto wished he knew how to comfort him, but in this case he did not think there was anything that could be said or done to ease that suffering.

Rin’s eyes hardened, the memory shoved away to the dark recesses of his mind to haunt him another day. “It’s not important now. Haru has a child, his first child, and that is what matters. But of course Mieko has the same stubborn will as Haru, and of course that will leads him to the only place Haru can’t follow. Mieko has the surface in him and it’s the surface he yearns for.”

Makoto frowned. “The surface? I don’t understand.”

“You are thick, aren’t you?” Rin sneered. When Makoto said nothing, he gestured emphatically. “Mieko is yours. A risk that has never been taken before, a child of land and sea, and Haru loves him more than anything.”

It was something he’d suspected – a possibility Nagisa had been drilling into his head all day – but hearing the words from Rin’s mouth seemed to finalize it, and the truth hit Makoto with the force of a speeding vehicle. Makoto swayed on his feet, feeling his knees might give out on him at any moment.

_He’s mine. Mieko is my son. Haruka and I have a child._

And yet, one of them was doomed to lose him forever.

“You’re a kind human,” Rin said, “kinder than most. But I won’t let Haru say goodbye to another child.”

Makoto nodded, cold and hollow. He wished Haruka were there, but at the same time he was glad for Rin’s presence. If he could see Haruka now, look into his eyes and see the loss reflected in the clear blue, he did not know how he would react. “What should I do, Rin?”

Rin did not spare his feelings as he told him honestly, “bring Mieko back tomorrow night. And then let them go – both of them.”

It was the right thing to do; Makoto knew that.

But that didn’t make it any easier.

When he returned to his apartment, he ignored Nagisa’s badgering. Nagisa wanted to hear all about it, if he’d met Haruka and if he’d had any trouble with the patrols set up. Makoto thanked him quietly for watching the house in his absence, and disappeared into his bedroom. Not long afterwards he heard the apartment door opening and closing, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel guilty for not saying goodbye. He curled up on the bed, wrapped his arms around Mieko, and tried not to cry for the son he had only barely started to know.


	8. Chapter 8

“I don’t see why you have to say goodbye forever,” Nagisa complained.

Makoto had calmed down enough to relay his conversation with Rin when Nagisa called bright and early – by his standards, which meant around ten-o-clock – the next day. Already Makoto had been up for several hours, because the universal rule of thumb for all toddlers no matter the species seemed to be that the first rays of sunlight meant playtime.

“He’s your son just as much as Haru-chan’s. You deserve to have a relationship with him.” That had been the change in tune Nagisa had been singing ever since Makoto could say with certainty that Mieko was his. Appealing as it was, Makoto knew better than to even entertain the notion for a second. False hope was the last thing he needed right now.

Makoto shook his head, rubbed a nagging remnant of morning gunk from his eyes. “Believe me, I want nothing more than that. And I’m sure Haruka does too, but... It’s dangerous. I’d be an idiot not to realize that. And knowing that, to insist on seeing him anyways… that’s just selfishness.”

“But Mi-chan doesn’t even want to stay with him,” Nagisa pressed.

“You don’t know that. He’s barely three years old. He needs his mo—” Makoto stopped. It still felt strange to refer to Haruka as a mother. “He needs Haruka. And he misses him. I can’t take that necklace away for ten minutes before he starts panicking.”

A puff of air sounded from over the line. “But he kept going to the shore. He was obviously looking for something, and that something had to be you.”

Makoto mentally closed his ears to any further argument Nagisa might rattle off. He appreciated his friend’s support, truly, but he wished Nagisa would just stop. Accepting that he had to return Mieko and forever part ways with him and Haruka had been nearly impossible the first time, and thinking about it still brought fresh tears to his eyes. If he built up his hopes only to have them bitterly knocked down again, Makoto did not think he’d be able to live through it.

“It’s okay,” he said, voice soft. Mieko sucked away at a bottle of warm milk, head tucked against the crook of Makoto’s arm. Makoto sifted a hand through his silky black hair and ignored the stinging mist that threatened to cloud his vision. “I’ll be fine. I’m lucky to have met him.”

The bottle’s nipple popped out of Mieko’s mouth and he stared up at Makoto with a strange expression, almost as if he could understand the wave of emotion looming over him. He reached up with one stubby arm, traces of iridescence that Makoto could faintly make out beneath the pinkish human skin if he looked for it, and brushed Makoto’s jaw with his fingers. Makoto gasped. Mieko murmured something, likely a Sessa word, which Makoto had never heard before. Makoto bit his lip.

“Do you think Rei-chan might be able to help? He’s been super interested in figuring out the attacks.”

“No,” Makoto said, probably with more force than necessary. He liked Rei, and he thought the professor and Nagisa made a sweet couple, but he couldn’t chance anyone else finding out about the Sessa. Telling Nagisa had been a big enough risk. And especially since Rei was already interested in this case, telling him was not the best plan.

“Are you sure? He’s got his doctorate, maybe he knows some special marine biologist secrets.”

“I appreciate it, Nagisa, but I really don’t want anyone else knowing about Mieko. It’s too dangerous.” Makoto sat through a moment of poignant silence. “I can hear you sulking over the phone, stop it.”

“If you’re sure...” Nagisa heaved a sigh. “Let me know what I can do, at least. I’ve already called off rehearsal.”

“You didn’t have to do that,” Makoto chastised. “I don’t want you getting cut from the show.”

He could envision Nagisa waving a hand in that carefree way of his. “Don’t worry, don’t worry. I already told you I’m going to see this through till the end. Hazuki Nagisa never breaks a promise!”

Makoto politely refrained from pointing out all the times when the exact opposite held true. “I’m thinking I’ll bring him tonight, to the beach where I met with Rin. If he shows up again, he should be all the protection Mieko needs to avoid any of the coastguards.”

“Can I at least come over to say goodbye?”

Some part of Makoto wanted to selfishly keep Mieko to himself for the precious hours he had left, but he couldn’t forget the help Nagisa had been to him throughout the tumultuous past few days and also the years since his first meeting Haruka. It was only right Nagisa received the chance to say goodbye properly.

Nagisa cheered on the other end of the phone. “I’ll be there soon,” he promised, and not even a full second later the dial tone sounded in Makoto’s ear. Makoto shook his head, lips quirked in a wry smile.

As it turned out, ‘soon’ actually meant three hours. The time allowed Mieko a generous playtime in the bathtub, and a chance for Makoto to work on the boy’s walking skills. By the time the doorbell rang, Makoto could stand at one end of the living/dining area and Mieko could make his wobbly way to him from the opposite side of the room.

“I think you’re missing your calling,” Nagisa said, having let himself in to the sight of a proud Makoto lifting Mieko off the floor and twirling him in the air while gushing proudly about what a fast learner he was. “You should work with kids. Or maybe you’re just meant to be a stay at home daddy.”

Makoto carefully settled Mieko back down on his feet. Mieko swayed a little bit, and then grasped the corner of the low table to balance himself upright.

“You need to find a pretty girl and then just start having babies. There’s a few girls in the theatre department you’d think are cute. One of them is so short, she’d come up to your chest.”

“Nagisa.” Makoto forced his voice out from a tightened throat. “If it’s all the same to you, I really don’t want to talk about this right now.” He didn’t want to think about dating again for a long time, at least not until he’d finished school. Right now he would only compare everyone to Haruka, and no matter how cute or beautiful, no girl Nagisa introduced him to could ever fill the emptiness in his heart from losing his son.

Nagisa scratched the back of his neck, genuinely apologetic. “Right. I didn’t mean to...”

“I know.” Makoto smiled gently, but it did not quite reach his eyes. Nagisa tended to speak without thinking, but he wasn’t an insensitive person, and usually he meant well.

Mieko bounced on his feet between them, reaching out for the remote control that rested on the other corner of the table. Nagisa crouched down next to him. “I have something for you, Mi-chan.” Nagisa pulled a small plastic bag out from his back pocket, and Mieko’s blue eyes automatically lit up. “You’re always after Makoto’s necklace, but that’s a precious gift from Haru-chan. You won’t be able to take it with you.” Mieko tilted his head curiously as Nagisa revealed the present: a simple rope necklace with a square emerald stone at the center. “You can take this one instead. The color reminded me a bit of Mako-chan’s eyes, so you can think of him whenever you look at it.”

He draped the necklace around Mieko’s neck, Mieko automatically reaching for the stone and examining it with interest.

Makoto felt tears stinging his eyes and had to look away. “You didn’t have to do that.”

Nagisa laughed. “I know. I wanted to, for Mi-chan.”

Makoto fidgeted. “Was it expensive?” He’d have to pay Nagisa back somehow. Mieko wasn’t related to him; he shouldn’t have spent that kind of money on him.

Nagisa rolled his eyes. “Nothing’s too much for Mako-chan’s only son. In fact...” He pulled another necklace from the bag, the same cut and style as Mieko’s only with a tanzanite– identical to the iridescence of Mieko’s tail, if Makoto remembered correctly.

“I can’t accept this,” Makoto said, holding his hands up in protest.

“Too late!” Nagisa pulled Makoto down by the collar of his shirt and fastened the necklace about his neck.

“It’s too much, I can’t—”

Nagisa slapped his cheek playfully. “Mako-chan, it’s the least you deserve. And this way” –he paused to adjust the necklaces, the tanzanite and the crystal from Haruka, side by side— “you can carry both of them next to your heart.”

Makoto didn’t know what to say. His heart swelled with immeasurable gratitude and affection the magnitude he’d never felt for his best friend before. He threw his arms around Nagisa in a crushing hug, hiding his tears in the fluffy blond hair. “You really are the greatest friend.”

For once, Nagisa didn’t have an overly chipper or smug reply. He simply wrapped his arms around Makoto’s shoulders and let him cry.

* * * *

Makoto had a bad feeling. Just a bothersome roiling in the pit of his stomach, not overpowering enough to make him completely change his mind, but with presence enough for him to question every decision he’d made since meeting Haruka and embarking on the slow and excruciating journey to inevitable heartbreak.

It was late and he’d wasted many opportunities to talk himself out of what needed to be done – though he’d very nearly succeeded on several occasions, no thanks to Nagisa’s constant whining about unfairness, but because of Mieko himself. The same love that wanted to see Mieko safely returned to his home in the ocean with Haruka and the rest of his kind also ate away at Makoto like a particularly corrosive poison, making him yearn for nothing more than to take the child and flee from this place, start fresh.

Either way, he did not think he would ever truly be happy. Losing Mieko would be losing a part of himself, but keeping him was a betrayal Makoto knew himself incapable of. Especially considering how much Haruka had lost already...

Rin only specifically mentioned his, but he’d alluded to others. Babies that had come into the world and felt the warmth of the sun on their faces, who Haruka had probably held and even played with, kissed the tops of their little heads and put them to sleep at night with a heart nearly bursting with love and pride. Having to let go of Mieko felt akin to cutting his own heart out, but at least Makoto knew Mieko was alive and would be with family who loved and would protect him. Haruka’s children were gone from him permanently. Makoto honestly did not know how Haruka remained so strong.

Haruka deserved this happiness. And, Makoto had to grudgingly acknowledge, so did Rin. He loathed the idea of another man taking his place as Mieko’s father, but Rin was good, and he wanted what was best for Mieko and Haruka just as much – if not more – than Makoto. Not only that, but Rin was capable of providing the best life for them, ensuring their health and survival in a way Makoto could never hope to.

Mieko did not panic at the sight of the beach. He stiffened and held a bit more tightly to Makoto’s shirt, but even when Makoto carried him across the sand he stayed perfectly calm.

It was not the best night for stealth. While still dark, the full moon coupled with the clear sky offered little cloak of shadows to hide their path. Makoto wished he could postpone the rendezvous with Rin for that reason alone. Nothing about the circumstances settled right. The most he could hope for was for Rin to appear soon, so Makoto could pass Mieko off to him without a fuss and be on his way before he turned into an emotional wreck – all of that without being heard or spotted. Part of him also wanted to see Haruka one final time, but the larger, more rational side of his brain understood it would be for the best if that didn’t happen.

“We have to say goodbye soon,” Makoto whispered, fighting to keep his voice from wavering. He shifted Mieko in his arms to get a better look at him, memorizing his features – an odd mixture of his and Haruka’s faces, now that he knew what to look for – one last time. “I’m so glad I got to meet you. I don’t know if you understand, or of you’ll remember that, but I...”

He stopped, held the boy a little tighter. Pressed his forehead to Mieko’s and wished desperately that they lived in a different world, a different time. Maybe a world where Haruka was a human and they could have been a normal human family. A world where he could have watched Mieko grow up and become a man, and get married and have children of his own. Summer camping trips, little league, holidays and lazy days and so many things that could have been but could never be.

He wouldn’t cry.

“You have a father who loves you very, very much. You didn’t know that before, I don’t think, but... but now I hope you do.” A small hand touched his chin, and Makoto thought he might already have been crying after all. He didn’t want to, but just as everything else in his life the past three years, it was out of his hands.

“Paah, paah, paah,” Mieko soothed, gently patting Makoto’s cheek.

Makoto gave a watery smile and kissed his hand. “Your papa will always love you, Mieko. And Haruka too. No matter how much time passes, I’ll never stop loving either of you.”

“What kind of life will that be?”

Makoto’s breath caught in his throat at the achingly familiar voice. His Japanese had improved greatly. Makoto wondered if Rin had helped teach him. Though he honestly couldn’t imagine Rin happily going along with that particular whim, Rin had an obvious weakness when it came to Haruka – a weakness Makoto himself was not immune to.

He almost didn’t want to look. _Save yourself the pain. Don’t make this harder than it has to be._

But of course he turned, and his knees nearly buckled at the sight of Haruka not even ten feet away, his dark head and the pale silver column of his throat the only things visible above the water. Makoto yearned for all of him, for reasons purely selfish and inappropriate while he held their child in his arms. “Haruka...” He breathed the name like a prayer – a sacred, fragile thing that should only be spoken in reverence.

Haruka turned his head to the side, and there was distance in his eyes. He was closed off to Makoto, as well he should be. Both of them knew this could never work. Both of them knew this was the end. “I came for Mieko.”

Makoto nodded, numb. He waded out a little further into the waves. “He’s... he’s amazing, Haruka. Smart and kind, and beautiful... just amazing.”

Haruka accepted the compliment with a curt, “thank you.” Then he hesitated, eyes softening a fraction. When he spoke next it was in a whisper so soft Makoto almost missed it over the crash of the waves. “He reminds me of Makoto.”

Biting his lip, Makoto hugged Mieko to him again. It was time to go. The longer he lingered, the harder it was to part. He moved slowly deeper into the water, and as he did so he noticed Mieko begin to squirm against his hold. In hushed tones he reassured the child, saying he would be with ‘Ahroo’ now, and that everything would be fine.

Mieko’s panic only increased, however, and when barely three feet separated them from Haruka, Mieko shrieked. “No! No Ahroo – paah! _Paah_!”

“Mieko! Mieko, _hush_ , it’s all right,” Makoto cooed, struggled to control the boy now thrashing in his arms. “We’re here. We’re both here for you. Haruka—” He reached out, but Haruka had already moved, swimming up to Makoto’s side and placing his webbed hands on Mieko’s cheeks. A low, gentle song escaped Haruka’s lips, the barrier of foreign language unable to mask the unmistakable sound of a mother’s lullaby.

Makoto trembled, a vision of the three of them entering his mind: Haruka holding Mieko in a rocking chair, singing him sweetly to sleep while Makoto himself watched from the doorway, eyes soft with affection. When Mieko was tucked in bed, Makoto would take Haruka in his arms, pin him up against the doorjamb and kiss him deeply. Haruka would be human, soft and plaint under Makoto’s hands, and making love in the privacy of their own room would be just the perfect ending to a perfectly normal day.

Another life, another time, another happiness stolen from them.

Makoto leaned closer to Haruka and nudged his shoulder. Haruka’s eyes widened. Before he could pull away, Makoto kissed his temple. Haruka’s fingers twitched against Mieko’s cheeks, his song faltering only momentarily. When it picked up again they moved to lower Mieko into the water.

He screamed.

Though he’d somewhat been expecting it, Makoto still flinched, the pained sound shaking him to his core and threatening to tear him apart as well. The miraculous transformation that had occurred seemed to be reversing, Mieko’s legs fusing together, the bones rearranging themselves back into their original state. Makoto would have given anything to take his place, to spare him of that pain, but as it was he could only look on, aghast.

“Another attack!”

“This way – it came from over here!”

Before Makoto could even process what was happening, searchlights lit up the beach and water just to the right of them. Makoto’s heart leapt into his throat. Haruka’s eyes left Mieko’s tortured face for the briefest of moments to sweep over Makoto in a silent plea for help. Makoto opened his mouth, and then shut it tightly. There was nothing they could do, not with Mieko in the midst of changing.

Blue eyes narrowed to slits, darting around the area, landing on the approaching searchlights. In the distance Makoto picked up the sound of motors – the patrol boats were on their way.

“You have to go,” Makoto insisted. “Take him and swim. Just go.”

Haruka shook his head quickly and brought a hand to his throat. He stroked the skin there. “Air,” he said.

Just as he’d feared, Mieko still had not regrown his gills; he couldn’t yet breathe beneath the surface.

A shrill whistle pierced the air. Rin’s calling sound. The _Kallotom_ must have been hiding somewhere close by, for he surfaced within moments, jaw set and shoulders pulled back, muscles rippling in full-on hunting mode. Haruka passed him Mieko, who cried and jerked unnaturally. Webbing sprouted between his fingers, joining the digits together. Rin hesitated but took the boy in his arms. He looked to Makoto, but Makoto only focused on his son and the approaching boats.

He hadn’t been watching the beach.

Someone grabbed him roughly by the shoulder.

“Are you alright? Have you been bitten?”

Makoto felt as if he’d swallowed a bucket of seawater as a familiar face drifted before him. “P-professor—Rei, what are—”

“You have brought them straight to us,” Rin seethed.

Rei lifted the flashlight from Makoto’s face, satisfied when he appeared unharmed. “You shouldn’t be out here. There are barricades set up for...” His authoritative voice trailed off as the light illuminated the unnatural silver skin of Makoto’s companions.

Rin acted before anyone else, baring his teeth with a dangerous snarl and beating down his tail against the water.

Rei took in the ferocious sight of him and blanched. “I knew it wasn’t a shark.” He spoke more to himself than Makoto. “The bite radius, the tail – it didn’t match up. But _this_...” His violet eyes darted to the writhing child Rin held possessively, widening as he jumped to his own conclusions. The situation didn’t look good – a creature already suspected of attacking humans carrying what at first glance appeared to be a human child in indescribable pain.

“Rei, listen to me,” Makoto began, taking the professor by the shoulders. He needed to get things under control before the coastguard arrived, and that left him with mere seconds to work with. “It’s a long story but I swear I can explain it all later. For now—”

But Rei wasn’t hearing him. He took Makoto’s hands and attempted to pull him away from Rin and Haruka. “Get back. These are dangerous predators. They are already responsible for three attacks on our beaches, and I won’t let one of my students be next.” He fumbled at the belt around his hips and retrieved what looked like some kind of dart gun.

“No, Rei, you don’t understand—Rin, stop!” He lunged forward to keep Rin at bay, as the _Kallotom_ looked within an inch of tearing Rei’s throat out, but in the process Makoto missed Haruka lashing out, his smaller jaws clamping around Rei’s wrist.

Rei screamed. Haruka latched onto him, bright eyes shooting meaningfully over to Rin, who checked only to make sure Mieko was all right before flipping into the dark water and disappearing. They wouldn’t be back, Makoto knew, and insides twisted. The last memory he would have of his son was his shriveled, aggrieved body just beginning to grow back its scales, but he didn’t have the time to mourn this injustice now. “Haruka, stop, you have to!” Makoto, unthinking, grabbed the Sessa roughly under the arms. “He’s not going to hurt you, he— _aagh_!”

It was different from Rin’s bite. Haruka’s teeth were not as large, but there seemed to be more of them, little razors that tore easily through the skin. The bite did not go as deep as Rin’s had, but it hurt like hell. Tears stung his eyes.

“Haruka!”

Haruka jumped back suddenly, his chest heaving. Frightened blue eyes locked onto Makoto’s before Haruka whistled – that desperate, panicked whistle, the same as when he’d awoken in Makoto’s bathtub. Because the searchlights were upon them, and their time was up. Fighting through the shooting pain in his arm, Makoto attempted to calm Haruka down, but Haruka squirmed away from him in a frantic flight for open sea. The net came down on him before he could swim even two yards out. Haruka squealed, tail thrashing against the wire. Little cuts opened on his skin, the same as Makoto had seen when he’d found Mieko trapped in the shark net, but Haruka didn’t notice the wounds. He continued to struggle, his whistles threatening and pleading at the same time.

Makoto heard him calling for Rin, but Rin already had his duty, and if he actually abandoned Mieko to save Haruka – even though Haruka was his mate, and _Sessmalla,_ and shouting for him – Haruka would never forgive him.

As he didn’t look like he’d calm down anytime soon, and he’d already bitten two humans who’d come in close proximity to him, the tranquilizers came next. A paramedic ushered Rei from the water, and another approached Makoto. Makoto pushed her out of the way and forced his legs to work. “Haruka,” he rasped, dragging his injured arm through the water. The throb from the bite was dull compared to the sight of Haruka’s awkward and sluggish movements as the tranquilizer took effect on the proud and elegant creature.

A collective gasp rose as an iridescent azure tail broke the water’s surface and limply crashed back down again as Haruka’s body failed him. Makoto could only watch, and wish he’d been there fast enough to catch him.

“It’s true,” someone whispered.

Trembling, Makoto came to stand over Haruka’s unconscious form. His mouth worked but no sound came out. The world around him seemed to fade out of existence, all other sight and sound muted and unimportant, as the one bright spot in his life was captured and dragged out of the water as if he were nothing.

The dangerous reality was that he _was_ nothing. These people saw only a dangerous animal. He was not something magnificent to be respected and admired; he was a predator, something frightening that they did not understand, that needed to be put down before it brought harm to anyone else.

“You can’t... you can’t do this...” His words fell on deaf ears. People milled about, collecting Haruka’s scales from where they floated in the water, speaking theories and hypothesis overtop of each other and jabbering excitedly about who would take credit for the amazing discovery. Haruka’s body was hauled up to the shore and dumped there while the authorities deliberated. Only the intermittent rise of the waves kept the scales of his tail moist. “Haruka...”

“Sir, you need to have your arm looked at.”

Makoto blinked, forced himself to look at the solid brunette standing in front of him, her eyebrows drawn in concern. “My arm?”

The paramedic took him gently by the hand and led him to where he’d seen Rei taken earlier. “You’re bleeding,” she said gently. “You were bitten by that creature—”

“Haruka,” Makoto said, eyes narrowing. He pulled his hand free and she ducked her head in apology. “His name is Haruka.”

That surprised her, but not for the reason Makoto might have assumed. “His?” She pursed her lips and glanced over her shoulder at Haruka’s body. “The creature is clearly female.”

Makoto looked as well – his first proper look at Haruka’s body in the three years since they’d parted. While he seemed about the same size, there was a bit more weight on him than Makoto remembered, a softness to his arms and stomach that hadn’t been there before, and in place of the firm muscles of his chest were a pair of small, round breasts. Female, as the paramedic claimed.

A fresh spell of dizziness liquefied the muscles of his legs. The paramedic caught him when he stumbled, a sympathetic smile on her face. “Don’t worry. We’ll get you checked up. Shouldn’t take much to bandage the bite up, but you’ll have to get some blood work done. No telling what sort of diseases that thing might carry.”

This wasn’t happening. Couldn’t be happening. Everything he’d done to get Mieko back to Haruka – the promise he’d made to Rin, the vows he’d made to _himself_ to ensure that Haruka and Mieko lived on happily... All of it was ruined now. Even worse, the secret of the Sessa race had been exposed, endangering their entire species.

And it was entirely his fault.

 


	9. Chapter 9

There came a certain point in a friendship when a polite knock on the door to announce arrival became unnecessary. For Makoto and Nagisa, that line should have been crossed years ago – and indeed, most days Nagisa burst into Makoto’s home as if it were his own, regardless of if Makoto was even there or not. Makoto, however, always felt inexplicably rude walking into another’s home uninvited.

Today was the exception.

Upon meeting no resistance when he turned the knob, Makoto threw the door open and bounded into the small apartment, cheeks flushed and panting for breath. Nagisa jumped up from the sofa, features transforming rapidly from surprise to concern. No doubt he’d never seen his levelheaded friend so disheveled, but Makoto hadn’t thought to compose himself. Hadn’t thought about anything except for the fact that Haruka was gone – taken God only knew where, having who knows what unspeakable things done to him – and it was his fault, and _what was he going to do_?

“They’ve taken him!”

Nagisa blinked and took hold of Makoto’s hands, which had fallen heavily on his shoulders. “Mi-chan?”

Makoto shook his head, already moving away. He paced over to the window, running his hands nervously through his hair. “No, no, Mieko is... Rin. Haru – Haruka, he... He was there, and Rin – and he bit Rei, and they swam away – then the coastguard came... got him—”

“ _Makoto_.” Makoto jerked as Nagisa stepped right in front of him and grabbed hold of his arms. Nagisa met his gaze evenly. “I need you to calm down. You’re not making any sense.”

“They took Haruka.”

Nagisa’s breath whooshed from his lungs. He looked quickly to the doorway and back to his friend, before slowly moving away from Makoto to close the door that had been left wide open. “Who took him?”

“I don’t know,” Makoto said. He scrubbed anxiously at his face. “There were patrols on the beach. Rei was with them.”

That obviously caught Nagisa off guard. “Rei-chan?”

“He said he knew it wasn’t a shark attack all along, that he suspected something from the start. He wouldn’t—” Makoto paused, inhaled sharply. “Haruka bit him. They took him in an ambulance.”

“Bit him?” Nagisa repeated, aghast. For the first time he noticed the bandages Makoto sported on his arm. “Did he get you too?”

Makoto’s left hand flicked up briefly to brush over the wound. He barely flinched. “He was _scared_. I can’t blame him.”

Nagisa caught the words left unsaid. “But the town can. They’ll brand him as dangerous, especially if they think he was also behind the three attacks earlier in the week.” His magenta eyes passed over Makoto, taking in the defeated posture but unrelenting clenched fists. Gently, he took Makoto’s hand. “I’m here to help you,” he promised. “I already told you. Whatever you need, I’ll do it.” While he had Makoto’s attention, he reached into his pocket and fished out his cellphone. “I think we need to pay a little visit to Rei-chan.”

“I didn’t get a good look at his arm,” Makoto said as Nagisa punched a number into his phone. “If he’s in surgery I doubt they’ll let us see him, or release any information.”

“Oh, they’ll let me in,” Nagisa said. He winked at Makoto’s furrowed brow. “No one says no to Hazuki Nagisa.”

And wasn’t that the truth. The instant someone picked up on the other line, Nagisa switched on the tears, voice wobbling the appropriate amount as he asked if a patient by the name of Ryuugazaki Rei had been admitted into the emergency room recently. Predictably, the receptionist was reluctant to release information, and Nagisa stepped it up, going on with a lie about being Rei’s younger brother and having just received a call from their mother about a shark attack. At that point, information came more freely. Yes, there was a patient by that name and yes, he had suffered a bite from a shark but it wasn’t fatal. Relatives were welcome to come and visit.

All this Makoto heard over speakerphone. “You’re a good liar.”

Nagisa pocketed his cell before giving a flourishing bow. “It’s pronounced _actor_.”

* * * *

Luckily, the bite on Makoto’s arm hadn’t warranted stitches. That was what the paramedics who’d looked him over assured him, with their faces pinched in concern, and Makoto had agreed only because it meant less time in their company, listening to the progressively more horrible whispers they passed back and forth amongst each other. _What a terrible thing to have happened; what a vile monster plagued their beaches; were there more; how would they ever be rid of such a curse?_

Rei hadn’t been as fortunate. But then, Haruka hadn’t restrained the bite as he had the quick, anxiety-driven warning inflicted on Makoto.

Makoto’s brows knitted together worriedly, though he could not bring himself to apologize when he saw the neat little row of stitches on the professor’s arm. After all, he’d tried to stop Rei from getting closer. The _Sessa_ were not human; they couldn’t be expected not to lash out when backed into a corner.

That last thought tasted like bile.

 _Not human_.

Just another reminder of what could not be. Another reminder of how different he and Haruka truly were. Haruka was not human, no matter how desperately Makoto wished, and what they shared was not natural, despite the beautiful resulting life it created.

Makoto shook himself. Now was not the time for self-pity. Haruka was in danger, and Makoto could not rest until fulfilling his vow. Come hell or high water he would see Haruka returned to the ocean with their son. Enlisting Rei was the quickest method of accomplishing that. He brushed aside the professor’s relieved, “you’re all right,” with a grunt and a curt nod, and did not make any attempt to gentle his grip when he caught the man by the shoulders.

“Oh, Rei-chan, your poor arm!” Nagisa rushed into the room, gently batting Makoto away.

Rei blinked in surprise. “Nagisa, what are you doing here? How did you even—”

“Mako-chan told me what happened. It’s nice they gave you this private room, even though you only got stitches. Did you whine a lot?”

Rei’s expression morphed quickly from sharp disapproval to embarrassment. He pulled his arm away as Nagisa began to prod at the bite, and turned his attention back to Makoto. “You two shouldn’t be here, especially if you can’t be depended upon for discretion.”

A not-so-subtle request to leave which Makoto ignored. “Where is he?” 

The demand, and the way Makoto quietly shut the door behind him, had Rei’s eyes widening. “Makoto, I—”

Makoto didn’t want to hear excuses, and he especially had no patience for whatever lie the professor was trying pacify him with. It didn’t matter that Rei was his professor, or Nagisa’s boyfriend, or even a person Makoto had liked relatively well before tonight; Rei was a member of whatever party wanted the beach ‘predators’ tracked down, and thus Makoto’s only chance at finding Haruka again. He would have Rei’s cooperation, even if he had to force it. “ _Don’t_. You know who I’m talking about, and you know where they’ve taken him.”

Nagisa leaned forward on the bed. “You can’t just keep Haru-chan trapped in a cage. It isn’t nice.”

“Trapped?” Rei shook his head. “We can’t just let go of quite possibly the biggest scientific discovery of the century.”

“What do you plan to do with him, then,” Makoto scoffed, “exhibit him at the aquarium?”

“We never expected to find anything like this,” Rei said quickly. “If it had been a shark like most assumed, it would have been caught, tagged, and released somewhere far from our beaches. This is... it changes everything.” His eyes, almost too small in his face without the glasses Makoto was so accustomed to seeing perched high on his straight nose, stared at the stitches on his arm for a long while, but his mind was clearly elsewhere, most likely still trying to process everything that had happened. “I remember your initial submission for your research topic,” he finally said. “Sirens. You’ve known about this for a long time.”

Makoto shifted uncomfortably. Doubtless Rei had a multitude of questions, and right now Makoto hadn’t the time for any of them. Maybe one day he’d tell Rei everything about his meeting Haruka, about Mieko, but it all depended on Rei’s actions now. If he could count Rei as an ally, he would repay him with any information the professor wanted.

For now, he answered the unspoken question hanging in the air, the _why did you never tell anyone_. “It wasn’t my secret to tell. They’ve kept their existence hidden from us for hundreds of years. Longer, even.”

“One revealed itself to you,” Rei pointed out.

“And now he’s in danger,” Makoto countered. His gaze softened into something almost like pleading. For Haruka’s life, he would beg if he had to. “I need you to help me.”

Rei frowned, squinting at him. “They’re going to want to perform tests, of course. Scans, blood work. Anything that might help them better understand. This is a scientific discovery, Tachibana. It won’t be mistreated.”

“ _Sessa_ ,” Makoto grit out before he could stop himself. He hated to hear such a proud and elegant race referred to as ‘ _it_.’ “They’re called _Sessa_.” Belatedly he realized he’d clenched his fists, and so ease to the threat he knew his height sometimes imposed, he forced his posture to relax.

“ _Sessa_...” Rei rolled the word on his tongue, tasted it at different volumes, his eyes bright with new discovery.

“I can give you information. Everything I know about them.” It wasn’t really a lot, thanks to the language barrier between himself and Haruka and Rin’s aversion to divulge their race’s secrets to an unworthy land-dweller. But Rei didn’t know that, and considering no one else had encountered theSessa before, Makoto’s words – no matter how far they stretched the truth – should be taken as gospel.

“I don’t think they will believe you. When we found you, that creature had bitten your arm. You’re just as much a victim as any of those attacked before. They’ll think you’re making it up.”

And just as easily as it built up, Makoto’s bravado crumbled. He fell to his knees in front of the hospital bed, head bowed. “Please, Rei. I can’t live with myself knowing they’re going to keep him locked away in some tank, experimenting on him at their will.”

Rei scowled and reached impatiently for his glasses. “It will hardly be _experimenting_. Animal rights would be down our throats if any harm befell it – the Sessa.”

The bedside table proved just a fraction out of his reach and, noticing his mounting frustration, Nagisa silently took the glasses and passed them to Rei. “But he has a family,” Nagisa said.

“That’s right,” Makoto spoke over him, before Nagisa let slip the one secret that couldn’t be revealed. If the discovery of not only a Sessa, but also the fact that a Sessa and human had coupled successfully became public knowledge, there would be pandemonium. The less attention drawn to Haruka the better, and Makoto staying out of the limelight would make it simpler for him to find a way to set Haruka free. “A—a mate. A child.”

He realized the error in this choice when someone gasped. Standing several feet away was a slim but smartly dressed woman whose wise hazel eyes betrayed the youthfulness of her features. She breezed over to them, gaze raking first over Rei and Nagisa before dismissing them and landing on Makoto.

“There are more?” She was clearly not native to Japan. Judging by the accent, Makoto could only guess American. Behind her glasses, the woman’s eyes were bright. Makoto knew that look – that of a hunter right before the chase. “Near Iwatobi?”

Makoto shook his head quickly, trying to dig himself out of the hole he’d created. They couldn’t find where the pod lived. They couldn’t have the others – not Rin, not Mieko. Haruka would never forgive him; Makoto would never forgive himself. “I don’t know.”

The woman tossed her hair over her shoulder and leveled Makoto with an unimpressed stare. “I believe I overheard you telling Professor Ryuugazaki you had information on the creatures. You knew the name of their race. Know that the one we took custody of has a mate and a child.” She took a step closer, and Makoto fought down his instinct to flee. Something about her... On the surface she was an attractive woman. Almond-shaped eyes, sleek blonde hair styled in a pretty and practical bob, full lips. But in the face of selfish ambition, people revealed the worst of themselves; and those eyes were shrewd, those full lips tight at the edges with an ugly, repressed smirk. She was dangerous, this woman, far more dangerous than the supposed predators plaguing Iwatobi’s beaches.

“Even if we don’t have the exact location, we have you,” she said. “That might just be the next best thing.”

Rei spoke up, tentative. “Professor Seward.”

The name struck a chord of familiarity. Makoto frowned and studied the woman again, wracking his brain for where he’d heard it before.

“I don’t see why there’s a need to find the others,” Rei continued.

Professor Seward shrugged one shoulder. “As in any form of research, Professor, the best results are cultivated through numerous samples.”

Rei jerked, looking almost offended – as did Makoto. “ _Samples_?”

“Professor,” Makoto tried for respect and hoped his frustration did not leak into his voice, as he feared it might have. “These are living creatures.”

“Yes. Living, intelligent, _ferocious_ creatures.”

“They’re not,” Nagisa protested, garnering the professor’s attention once more. She took a step towards him, looking him up and down, and somehow under her eye even Nagisa’s larger-than-life exuberance managed to shrink.

“Who are you?” Professor Seward demanded.

Rei spoke up quickly. He stood beside Nagisa, a hand on the blond’s elbow. “He’s my – he’s with me.”

Seward took one look at their proximity and seemed to guess the truth. “I don’t care who he’s with. He needs to leave.”

Nagisa glared and opened his mouth to argue, but Rei tightened his grip on his arm. “I’m not leaving,” he argued, directing his frustration at Rei for not backing him up.

“You are of no use to my research team,” said professor Seward. “If you’re not gone in two minutes I will call in my security team and have them physically remove you.”

Again Nagisa prepared to fight, but this time Makoto intervened. He spoke softly, in an almost defeated voice. “You should go, Nagisa. This isn’t something I should have involved you with in the first place.”

“But Mako-chan...”

Makoto cut his gaze to Seward, who stared at her wristwatch, mouthing the passing seconds. “It’ll be fine, Nagisa. I promise. Just go.”

Nagisa was reluctant, but did as told – though not without a shooting a poisonous look at Seward on the way out. The woman didn’t even bat an eyelash.

Makoto waited until the door closed again before addressing her. “He was right, you know. They aren’t ferocious at all. You make any animal feel threatened and they will lash out – that includes humans.”

The professor could not contain her smile. She approached him slowly, sizing him up now, easily separating his gentle personality from his formidable height.  “Do you know what we do to humans who lash out, boy?” She leaned into him, minty breath washing over his jaw. “We lock them up. Some of them we even put down.”

Makoto’s heart stuttered, cold dread seeping into his veins. “Put down...”

“Not that we would do that here. This creature is far too valuable to simply dispose of.”

“You can’t just keep him caged forever—”

“We can do whatever we like,” Seward snapped. “It is _our_ discovery. Whatever ties you may have had with his species no longer matter, because you work for _us_ now. You’ll help us retrieve the information we need, boy, or I’ll see to you reunited with your ancestors through a watery grave.”

_With your ancestors._

_‘Can we assume that creatures such as mermaids are in fact our ancestors...’_

_‘Some research... humans evolved to live on land.’_

_‘...return to our ancient habitat of the sea?’_

“Seward,” Makoto breathed, eyes wide. The title had been faded on that book, but the author’s name remained clearly printed on the inside cover. “Vanessa Seward.”

Professor Seward tilted her head, surprised but not displeased. “My grandmother.”

“She believed humans evolved from the sea.”

“Read her book, have you?” Seward chuckled. “She used to feed me those stories as a child. Mermaids, sirens... She was obsessed. And I suppose some of that obsession rubbed off on me, though until tonight I never really believed such creatures were real.”

“What about the other part,” Makoto wondered. Sweat beaded along his brow, and he had to force his breathing to remain even. “That humans can return to the sea. Do you believe in that?”

He wasn’t sure if he wanted to hear the answer, but she gave it to him anyways. Spread her arms out, that predatory gleam in her eyes again. “That would be what we’re going to find out.” She inclined her head to the left, looking to something Makoto could not see through the window on the horizon. “That pretty creature – the _Sessa_ , did you call it? – it knows the secret to existing in that world. I’ll have my grandmother’s dream realized even if I have to dissect it myself.”

Makoto sprang forward, eyes flashing, the threat to Haruka’s safety the only thing necessary to unchain his protective instincts. “You’re not going to touch him!”

“What did I tell you about humans who lash out?” Seward’s voice did not hold a trace of irritation. Rather, she sounded amused. Makoto came back to himself to realize he had the lapels of her cream-colored blazer clenched tightly in his fists. He swallowed and eased back, and she laughed as if he were an endearing puppy dog who nuzzled against her after chewing up her favorite shoes. “I won’t have to touch him at all if you’re a good boy and do as I ask. Now...”

She turned away, walking briskly toward the door, and beckoned him to follow. 

Makoto stayed right where he was. “Where are we going?”

Seward did not break her stride, barely even turned to look back at him. “You wanted to see it, did you not?”

* * * *

Makoto shouldn’t have been surprised when he found himself on a boat. A short trip on a helicopter brought him and Professor Seward miles out to sea, to a vessel clearly built for research. Below the deck were cramped labs and a room filled with aquariums. Water pumped in from the surrounding ocean filtered through them, and Makoto’s mind raced with all the potential ways he could use their location to his advantage. Due to the close quarters it would be nearly impossible to sneak Haruka away unnoticed, and without any friends aboard he couldn’t count on anyone to create a diversion.

The largest tank, a 6x3 cylinder dominating the far left corner of the room, was empty when they arrived, but the roiling sense of dread in Makoto’s stomach only intensified as he laid eyes on it. He knew without having to ask that this was where they were keeping Haruka, the supposedly ‘safe quarters’ allotted to him.

“He can’t fit in this.” Makoto pressed a hand to the glass, brow furrowing as he measured his own head over the top of the tank. Haruka was smaller than him only if one overlooked his tail. The powerful muscle stretched well over a yard long. “It’s too small.”

“It’s all we have, unfortunately,” a nearby young woman lamented. She was short, barely reaching at Makoto’s shoulder, and her brown eyes reflected genuine sympathy as she approached. The name on her identification tag read Dr. Amakata. “It’s only temporary.”

“Meaning he’ll just be put in another tank,” Makoto snapped, unable to contain his anger. “It doesn’t matter the size, he doesn’t deserve to be locked away like this.”

“You keep saying ‘he’.” Seward came up to stand beside him.

Makoto clenched his jaw. Refusing to give the information would be taken as insubordination and insubordination likely to get him removed from the ship. If he wanted to help Haruka he would have to comply with Seward’s demands – at least for now. “Haruka is not female, but he isn’t entirely male either,” he explained, looking straight ahead at the cylindrical tank. He missed whatever expression the professor made in reaction to his words, but her sharp inhale assured him it was one of surprise. “Among his kind it’s something rare, I think.”

“Hermaphroditic.”

“Normally he prefers his male form, but he can change it at will.”

Seward rubbed at her chin, an interested glimmer in her eyes. “ _Fascinating_.”

“If you think about it,” Amakata piped up, “it isn’t that different from other varieties of fish. In some species, the dominant male is known to change into a female.”

It really was as simple as that. Not a genetic mutation, or some divine intervention by the gods - a blessing sent by the sun, or whatever the Sessa believed. Simply, at some point, the need for changing genders had arisen, and the trait passed down through generations, popping up every now and again just to ignite a fresh spark of wonder among their kind.

Only now it wasn’t just their kind who knew this secret, and humans, as they tended to do with all things in nature, would undoubtedly exploit all there was to learn from Haruka.

An excited tremor disrupted Seward’s cool façade. “What else can you tell me?”

Now Makoto did face her, but only to pin her with the most authoritative glare he could muster. Compliance did not mean he couldn’t make demands of his own. “Nothing, unless I see him.”

Seward’s lip curled in distaste, but she did not put up a fight. She sauntered out of the room, giving only a quick jerk of her head as invitation for Makoto to follow. He did so with haste, taking note as they journeyed down the brief, narrow corridor of every camera mounted to the low ceiling. The room she brought him to required an identification badge for entry. Makoto wondered at his odds of pilfering Amakata’s, or any of the other scientists residing on board, and decided those chances were depressingly low. He’d never been good with deception, and never in his life attempted to steal anything that didn’t belong to him. If Nagisa were here he could probably sweet-talk someone into handing his or her badge over in a flash; but alas, he’d been left ashore with an indignant Rei.

Inside it was just as cramped as the room of tanks they’d just left, but the set-up was more of a hospital room, with an examination table and different machines lining the walls, beeping at irregular intervals. Stretched out across the examination bed, restrained by leather straps, was Haruka. Despite having seen them at a quick glance on the beach already, the small breasts on Haruka’s shallow chest captured his immediate attention, but Makoto shook away his surprise as he took in the more alarming pallor of Haruka’s skin and the multitude of iridescent scales gathering on the floor around the gurney. His tail, the base fins of which dragged against the floor, was restrained just as Haruka’s wrists were, by a leather strap, just below where Makoto knew the hidden slit resided. The pressure of the straps looked uncomfortable, and he was sure they’d been locked on their tightest setting. Haruka wasn’t the type to submit without a fight.

But there was no fight in him now. He barely stirred when Makoto and Seward approached. Heavy lids struggled to open before inevitably falling back shut.

Anger boiled in Makoto’s veins. “You’re drugging him?”

Seward gave a casual shrug. “It would be impossible to run our tests otherwise. He’s quite feisty, your mermaid.”

“ _Sessa_.”

“We’ll call him what we like. An appropriate scientific name will be assigned once we’ve learned more about the species, but for now it’s easiest to go by terms everyone understands.”

One of Haruka’s hands twitched on the bed, and suddenly his eyes snapped open. He gave a familiar sounding whistle as his gaze darted frantically around the room. Makoto ran to his side, attempted to settle him with a hand on a pale silver arm. “Haruka – Haruka, it’s okay.” A lie. The words burned Makoto’s throat like acid. Nothing about this situation was okay by any stretch of the imagination. But what Haruka cared about most was not in danger, at least not at this moment. “Mieko is fine, he’s safe.”

Haruka whistled again – high, distressed. A plea for help. His arms fought against their restraints and his flukes slapped against the legs of the gurney. Makoto hated the distrust in his eyes, wished more than anything he could dispel it. But how to make Haruka believe he hadn’t been a part of this scheme from the beginning? He knew, at a base level, what this looked like: Makoto there when Haruka was captured, and Makoto aboard the ship now.

“I’m here to help you,” he promised. He petted Haruka’s hair tenderly, hoping to invoke memories of a time where things had been relatively simple and happy between them.

For a moment, it seemed to work. Haruka relaxed a bit, tipped his head into Makoto’s touch and closed his eyes; but then the circumstances converged back on him and had him struggling once more.  Makoto wished desperately to pull Haruka into his arms. Wished he could tilt that exquisite face up and brush a kiss to his lips, to his forehead, everywhere until Haruka believed with all of his heart hat Makoto loved him and would never want harm to befall him. But to show that level of devotion – to show that his concern was anything beyond that of a friend’s – would damn both of them.

Seward had enough leverage over Makoto; he didn’t need to give her any more. It was with that thought in mind that he eased back, though he kept his hand tangled in Haruka’s silky hair.

“He’s dehydrated. Whatever you’re giving him needs to stop. Find something else if you have to, but this...” Makoto paused, swept his eyes over the unnatural dryness of Haruka’s skin and then to the needle taped to the inside of his right arm. “This isn’t working. It’s making him sick. You can’t do anything with an unhealthy subject.”

A long stretch of silence passed between them. Seward’s dark eyes studied Haruka’s form, her small mouth pursed in consideration. “I suppose,” she said at length, “we’ve treated it too much like a human, using human sedation methods. But it’s not like us, is it?”

Makoto swallowed thickly but could not disagree.

“We’ll approach differently from now on. Now...” She waved her hand. Their time was over here. “If you’ll come with me. I have more questions for you.”

Unfortunately, there was nothing else he could do. At the very least Makoto was glad not to reveal the secrets Haruka and Rin had entrusted him with right in front of the _Sessa_. He did not think Haruka would forgive that betrayal so easily. Gently he brushed his knuckles over Haruka’s cheek, willed Haruka’s eye’s to open again. They did, as if sensing his heart’s desire, and there was such sadness in their blue depths that Makoto’s own heart felt the echo of despair. He couldn’t help himself. He leaned down, lips sliding over the delicate curve of Haruka’s ear. The soft little frays that lined the skin like peach fuzz tickled Makoto’s chin. “I’m going to get you out of here,” he said, barely a whisper he doubted even Haruka could hear, much less comprehend. “Makoto...” He wracked his brain for the words he hadn’t used in years – hadn’t needed to use, because Haruka had been gone. “ _Makoto_ _bi lle ffha_.”

Haruka’s lips parted and a sharp gasp escaped him. His hand twitched against the bed again, and Makoto thought that if he could Haruka would have taken his hand. He moved instead, curling his fingers around shaky pale digits, mindful of the delicate webbing. The tightness subsided very slightly from around Haruka’s eyes as they landed on Makoto’s chest – on the necklace Makoto still wore, even after three years.

“ _Llo ffha_ ,” he wheezed.

There came no resistance when Makoto finally stepped away from the gurney. Haruka regarded him with sleepy eyes, and though he was not content Makoto knew he would no longer struggle. Makoto had promised to set him free, and Haruka trusted him to fulfill that vow. Because Makoto was his. His human, his friend, his mate, the father of his only living child – Makoto was everything, and he did not take that responsibility lightly. He would prove himself worthy of the faith Haruka placed in him. Even if he had to move mountains, sell his soul in the process, Makoto would save Haruka.

God help anyone who tried to stop him.


	10. Chapter 10

Seward brought him to an office, private, away from the distraction of tanks and other researchers. Makoto sat at the narrow wooden desk in a chair bolted to the floor and wrung his hands nervously, thoughts still with Haruka in the next room.

"So they have a language of their own," Seward was saying. She sat on the opposite side of the desk with a recorder perched in front of her to document their conversation. 

Makoto nodded. "Mostly they communicate as any cetacean, with clicks and whistles that can carry through the water. But they have a spoken language too. Ah..." He shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "I'm afraid I don't know many words," he admitted.

"I imagine they're not very forthcoming."

Not wanting to give confirmation to the latter – Seward’s earlier threats about animals that lashed out still ringing in his ears - Makoto merely tipped his head to the side. " _Sessa_ is their name for their kind. _Malla_ is the sun, and, I think, something of a goddess to them. They call Haruka _Sessmalla_. Gift of _Malla_ , or... something."

He didn't miss Seward's twitch of annoyance.

"I suppose learning their language won’t really be necessary," she said after a moment. "You mentioned a mate. Would the mate know how to communicate with humans?"

"I don't know." The lie came automatically, and his voice didn't even waver. Makoto kept his gaze firmly locked on Seward, his protective instincts as a father arising. Right now, Rin was the only protection Mieko had. "I've never officially met him. They don't come to the surface often."

Seward's dark eyes narrowed. She leaned forward in her chair, fingers steepled beneath her chin. "Makoto," she said, voice lightly chastising, "you wouldn't be trying to lie to me, now would you?"

Makoto stayed under her focus, unblinking, and relaxed his jaw when it threatened to clench. "There's really no point in my lying, Professor."

"No, there's not," Seward agreed. "Especially when I hold everything needed for making you talk."

"I've been honest."

"And I believe you... to an extent. But something about your story doesn't sit right with me."

Makoto gritted his teeth. "It's just like I told you. I found him on the beach three years ago. He looked like he was injured so I brought him to my house to look him over—"

"Instead of alerting any kind of authority who might have been able to better care for injured sea-life." Heat crept into Makoto's cheeks as Seward punctuated the words with an unkind chuckle. "I believe your idea of treatment is far more inhumane than anything we've done here. Your ignorance might have killed it."

She wasn't telling him anything he hadn't already beaten himself up over three years ago. Makoto had known the risks in taking Haruka to his home - but he’d also been aware of the greater danger of exposing his discovery to the world. At least putting Haruka in a bathtub hadn't put the lives of the entire pod at stake.

Seward waved a dismissive hand. "I suppose we can't blame the youth for being young. You didn't know better, so you did what you thought was right."

Makoto ignored the slight. She wanted to rile him up, but no insult to his intelligence would be enough to do so. "So why are we rehashing this now?"

A thin folder with his name emblazoned in the top corner caught Makoto's eye as Seward pulled it forth from the desk drawer. She flipped it open and perused lazily. "Tachibana, Makoto. Age: twenty-three. Occupation: full-time student at Iwatobi University, part-time cashier at a pet supplies store. Struggled a bit in general studies, especially in English, but otherwise achieved top marks all around. What doesn't sit right with me, Tachibana, is how a student who obviously has a good head on his shoulders is still attending a school that he should have rightfully graduated from at least a year ago."

Makoto's mind was so busy reeling from the fact they had acquired so much information about him in such a short amount of time, he didn't even register the lapsing silence given for him to explain himself.

"It must be a terrible financial burden on your family. They don’t live here, correct? They’re further inland. Your father makes a decent living as a banker, but with a stay-at-home wife and two other children to put through school it hardly enables a family to save."

The blood drained from Makoto's face. In all this time, had he really been so selfish? "I..." There was no excuse. Nothing but his own desires held him in Iwatobi - the desire to see Haruka again, the vain hope that the _Sessa_ might come back to him, that they could – he didn't even know. He'd been hanging on to childish dreams, and in doing so missed the strain it put on the other most important thing in his life. What kind of son was he, that he would increase his family's hardships? What kind of role model for his brother and sister?"I just wanted..." His voice trailed off, but Seward was all too happy to finish the thought.

"You just wanted to see your mermaid again. I don't blame you. It has a certain... allure."

She set the folder down on the desk, and from where it lay open Makoto saw a generic school photo of himself side-by-side with a candid shot from just the night before. From the angle and lack of natural light, it was impossible to make out the dark shape in Makoto's arms, even with the obvious attempts to doctor the photo brighter.

"So tell me, Tachibana. If you had only met with the mermaid the night you rescued it on the beach, or even just a few times afterwards, why on earth would you stay in Iwatobi this long?"Makoto swallowed thickly, but it did little to free the words still lodged deep in his throat. "And why would such an elusive creature place its trust in you after just one meeting?" Seward plowed on, not even giving him the chance to respond anymore. She'd already formed her own conclusions, Makoto could see in the glint of her brown eyes, and he feared those conclusions teetered dangerously close to the truth. "In that brief time, how could you have come to know any useful information about their species - or even understand what it attempted to impart, if indeed it does not comprehend your language?"

He was caught, and could not fault Seward for anything more than being smarter than him. Unaccustomed to lying, Makoto had created this trap for himself, and then he'd gone and let himself get tangled up in it.

Seward rose from the desk and began a leisurely stroll around the desk. When she came to Makoto's side, she placed her left hand on Makoto's shoulder and squeezed. "I'll give you one more chance to be completely honest with me."

One slender, manicured finger pointed to the vague shape in the candid photo, the darkened mass of Mieko in this midst of his excruciating transformation from human to _Sessa_. Soft lips brushed against Makoto's ear. Makoto's breathing slowed, heart stuttered, as the world narrowed down to that picture, the life he’d created and endangered without knowing.

"What is in this picture," Seward breathed against his skin, and the hot flush that swept over him in response burned not like lust, but rage.

Makoto acted before either of them were fully aware of it; shot up from the chair and swept his arm out in a wide arc. He caught her lip with his elbow, and the force of the shove had her stumbling back against the desk. Quickly and effectively he'd reversed their positions, so that she was leaning back into the desk and he towered over her, a hand fisted in her stylish blonde hair. With a swell of satisfaction atypical of his caring nature he noted the blood trickling from the cut on her otherwise sensual mouth.

There was a brief moment, as Makoto pulled her close and then slammed her back against the desk with enough force to bruise, where she looked genuinely afraid. Then she cocked her head to the side, stretched her lips into a wolfish grin.

"So protective. Almost as if _you_ were the mate."

Shock robbed Makoto of breath. He grappled for a hold on his control, but with that single, shrewd comment she had him. The defenses fell, and his expression read like an open book.

Seward raked her eyes over his body with newfound interest. Her hand slid over to the file just in heat away, fingertips settling over the indiscernible shadow.  "Is that so," she mused. "My, my, Tachibana... You are an interesting fellow."

Makoto bowed his head, tried to still the shaking in his limbs. This couldn't be happening, couldn't be... It couldn't, because he'd _promised_. He'd promised Haruka... and Mieko...

What kind of man was he if he could not even protect his own son?

"‘He has a mate and a child’. You would certainly know that, if _you_ were the father. But _how_?"

Before she could speculate further, the office door burst open. Two men with a military look about them strode into the room.

"We heard a commotion," one of then said, as the other approached and roughly pulled Makoto back. "Are you all right, Professor?"

Makoto heard a _click_ followed by the bite of metal against his skin, and his heart sunk as he realized he was about to be arrested.

Seward touched her lip as if she hadn't noticed the cut, blinking rapidly as her fingertips came away stained red. "There's no need for that, Sasabe," she assured, when the second man attempted to secure Makoto’s wrists with the handcuffs.

Sasabe opened his mouth to protest, but Seward continued to speak over him.

"Bring him to the holding room for now. I have work to do."

* * * *

The holding room was a cramped space reserved obviously for violators of whatever rules the ship functioned on. For assaulting the one controlling the operation, Makoto fully expected to be handcuffed and helicoptered back to shore - maybe even tossed overboard and left to drown if they didn't want to waste anymore time and energy on someone so insolent.Seward's threats reverberated in Makoto's brain as he paced the narrow room. At this point he would have preferred being thrown into the sea to the hell of waiting with only his imagination to conjure what punishments were in store.

Mainly he was afraid of what would happen to Haruka. Would they treat him badly because of Makoto's behavior?

_Stupid. How could you have done that?_

Attacking Seward felt good at the time, but it landed both himself and Haruka in a stickier predicament. And from the holding room he had no way to defend the _Sessa_.

He didn't know how long he waited, only that it felt like hours. At some point he must have fallen asleep, for his eyes felt crusty when the lock on the door rattled, and Sasabe's face appeared under the harsh synthetic light.

Sasabe was a middle-aged man, couldn't be more than forty, with natural blond hair just starting to grow out from it's uniform buzz and eyes that spoke just as clearly of his Japanese descent as his surname."Professor's calling on you," he said, tugging Makoto up by the elbow. "You're to take part in an experiment."

"Experiment?" They went up a short stairwell to the floor that held the tanks and the makeshift infirmary. "What do you mean?"

Sasabe looked sideways at him, his mouth awkwardly pinched. "I don't know anything about science," he admitted. "I'm just following my orders."

There was a note of apology in his voice Makoto did not understand until they entered the infirmary and he saw Haruka was once again strapped down to the bed. The silver skin and dark hair glistened with water, which meant he'd only just been taken from his tank probably around the same time Makoto had been released from his own prison, but Haruka's blue eyes were cloudy, unfocused.

With a quick glance around the room, Makoto took stock of everyone present. Aside from himself, Haruka, and Sasabe, Seward was also there, along with one other man. Not the officer who'd accompanied Sasabe earlier, but someone younger who, Makoto noted with acute discomfort, bore an uncanny resemblance to himself. He would brush it aside as mere coincidence, but Seward was not the type to do anything without purpose. This man, with his shaggy brown hair and downturned eyes just a touch darker than Makoto's own green, had been chosen for a very specific reason.

"Tachibana, this is Officer Iseri." Iseri gave a curt nod but did not interrupt his parade rest to extend a hand in greeting. Makoto stood by the door, eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Iseri has been kind enough to participate in testing a little theory of mine. As I said to you the other day, an experiment is most successful when results are cultivated from numerous samples, so I hope you will cooperate as well."

"Isn't experimenting on humans illegal?" Makoto bit out.

Seward didn’t miss a beat. "We’re not experimenting on you. You're our scientific variables, the changeable factors. I can't get our previous discussion out of my mind, you see."

Nausea crawled up his throat, and for a moment Makoto thought he was going to be sick. The feeling only intensified when Seward dismissed Sasabe. Sasabe hesitated. "With all respect, Professor, I think it's unwise to leave you with the man who attacked you, if the only other officer is going to be... occupied."

Seward thought about that for a moment, and then gave a conciliatory nod. "You can man the door. If you hear any disturbances, feel free to investigate."

And that was that. Sasabe cast Makoto another sympathetic look before he did as told. Makoto sagged as the only other person he could maybe convince to help turned a blind eye on the situation.

"Have a seat, Tachibana," Seward instructed with an indicative flick of the wrist to a metal chair against the wall. "You'll just be watching for now."

Numbly, Makoto obeyed, his focus trained on Haruka, and Haruka followed his movements. His eyes were lazily hooded in a way that struck a chord of familiarity in Makoto, and just for the sake of curiosity, Makoto took a deep breath. It was subtle, but beneath the sterile smell of formaldehyde and the pungent tang of salt that permeated the entire ship, he caught a whiff of something sweet. A peculiar odor he couldn't quite name that stirred a pleasant reaction in his body Makoto would rather not alert the other occupants of the room to.

He shifted in his chair, folded his hands too-stiffly in his lap."What did you give him?"

Seward smiled at Haruka. "He enjoyed some salmon not long ago. It may have been seasoned with phytochemicals, just to help things along."

Makoto closed his eyes, but the implications were too strong to ignore. "Please tell me you're not going to do this."

When he looked at Seward again it was as if someone had flicked a switch and cast her into a completely distorted light. She was ugly to him now in every possible way, her voice trailing thick slime over Makoto's skin. "Why?" she said. "You've already done it."

"That's not—"

"Don't be hypocritical, Tachibana. It's _exactly_ the same."

Except that Haruka had wanted him, Haruka had incited – with that scent, with the way he’d kissed Makoto – it _wasn't_ the same. “You can't do this," he insisted, voice weak. The scent from Haruka was growing stronger as the heart monitor picked up an acceleration, but for some reason he seemed to be the only one who'd noticed.

"I'm not going to do anything. And neither are you." Still with that little sneer-smile on her face, Seward crossed over to him. She leaned down as she had in the office, face close to Makoto's so her minty breath washed over his jaw. He shivered. "You didn’t think I'd let you get away with your disobedience so easily, did you?"

Out of the corner of his eye, Makoto noticed Iseri beginning to unclasp the top buttons of his uniform.

"Humans who lash out get punished, Tachibana."

"Haruka," Iseri whispered, looming over the gurney. Haruka sighed and looked up at him, and his brow furrowed in genuine confusion as he was obviously thrown off by the likeness. "It's me. Makoto."

"Ma... koto.." Haruka's voice was strange, throaty but muffled, as if someone had stuffed cotton balls into his mouth and he had to speak around them.

Makoto lurched forward instinctively, because no way could he actually sit and watch this happen.

"Don't force me to bring you back to the holding room, Tachibana. This is your sentence, and you're going to watch. History is being made right before us. Not only have we discovered a mermaid, but a way to create new life!"

Iseri discarded his shirt. He had a good body, a result no doubt of years of training, but Haruka was still hesitant to look upon him as he approached the gurney. Cloudy blue eyes went from welcoming to mistrusting and back again, until Iseri brushed his knuckles over Haruka's jaw and Haruka exhaled in a pleased sigh.

" _Llo ffha_..." Haruka tipped his head into the palm of Iseri’s hand, a gentle encouragement. Already there was a flush to his silver skin, induced by the drug slipped into his meal. He arched his back on the little bed, stretching himself out for who he thought was his human mate.

“It’s anatomy is quite interesting,” Seward commented, watching Iseri and Haruka’s interaction with a clinically blank expression. “The X-rays we took revealed a single lung at the center of the chest, so it can breathe both air and water. It’s the skin and tail that needs to be kept moist, and for that we’ve set up the drip.”

That explained the IV taped to Haruka’s inner right elbow, but nothing about Seward’s motivations for this particular experiment. Up until now Makoto thought her cold, surely, but this was an entirely new level of cruelty. Was it just for the glory that would come from the discovery?

"So what did you do, Tachibana," Seward wondered. "Mount him just like this? Or did he fuck you?"

Makoto's cheeks flared. He wasn't a prude, but he hated to hear what he and Haruka shared reduced to such base terms. It had been strange and, at times, even frightening, but to Makoto it had been beautiful, and remained still as one of his most precious memories.

"Don't be shy," Seward pressed. "We want to do our best to recreate what happened."

Iseri was touching Haruka's chest now, tracing down his sides and back up again. Haruka gasped as Iseri tweaked the left nipple, and Makoto felt himself harden. "You're disgusting." He didn't know if he meant Seward, Iseri, or himself. Maybe a combination of all three. "How does this have anything to do with realizing your grandmother's dream?"

Seward hummed. "I would think that would be obvious." She didn't take her eyes of Haruka and Iseri. Iseri  had crawled onto the gurney now; straddled Haruka's tail, and the sounds coming from Haruka were low and husky. "If humans evolved to live on land, then we can evolve to live back in the sea. By cross-breeding, perhaps we can create a life capable of existing on both land and in the sea."

She was right, more right than she even realized, but Makoto didn't say anything. The trade off for such an existence, after all, was the excruciating loss or growth of legs when that individual changed habitats.

"Even if it could, that doesn't help you. You wouldn't be able to return to the sea," Makoto pointed out.

Seward scoffed. "I could care less about breathing underwater. I could never understand why anyone would want to. But my grandmother was criticized and laughed out of the scientific community for her beliefs. Her books are considered folklore instead of genuine research. I'm doing this for her, to show the rest of them that she was right. I'll restore honor to her name—"

"Not by these means,” Makoto hissed. “There is nothing honorable about what you're doing here. Observational research, studying them from afar and not exploiting them – that's honorable. This is... This is playing god, and a cruel god at that."

A stony glare was his only response.

On the gurney, Iseri had slipped his hand down between the twin pelvic fins on Haruka’s tail. He and Seward must have examined the X-rays and whatever other scans performed on Haruka beforehand, for Iseri had no trouble locating the hidden slit, and it took very little coaxing to elicit a reaction from Haruka. He arched up, arms straining against the bindings that held him to the bed. It was at that moment, with the restriction of his arms, he seemed to realize something was wrong. First came only a confused whistle. Haruka peered up at Iseri, jerked one of his arms and made a prompting sound – clearly a request to be let go. When Iseri only smirked and continued to rub his fingers against the slit, Haruka bared his teeth. Blue eyes sharpened, and the slow, sensual undulating of his tail became a rough and sudden vault to throw Iseri off.

“Son of a bitch!” Iseri braced himself with one arm up by Haruka’s face, but Haruka thrashed again, so that he lost balance completely and his neck entered the dangerous vicinity of Haruka’s sharp teeth.

Makoto didn’t feel a shred of pity when the bite landed, and Iseri’s scream rang over the beeping of medical equipment. Neither did he simply sit idle and let Haruka’s retaliation go to waste. Seward had clearly expected nothing more than lazy compliance from her drugged subject, and so was very easy to take by surprise now. Makoto caught her by the throat, calling to mind what he remembered from his second year anatomy class about the pressure points in the human body. As disgusting a person as Seward was, Makoto could never justify killing someone. He jabbed at her collarbone, digging his fingers just behind the bone, and forced her to her knees. Once he had her there it was all too easy to wrap a hand around her throat and cut off air supply.

She choked, clawed at his hand, dark eyes still blazing. If he weren’t going to be arrested before, this surely would be enough to land Makoto in prison. But at this point that knowledge did not even bother him. If this was the only way he could free Haruka, so be it. He didn’t mind facing the punishment alone if it meant getting Haruka to safety.

“...get...f’this—T’chbana...I _will_...”

Her eyelids fluttered as the last of the fight seeped out of her, and Makoto caught her when her body pitched forward, unconscious.

Iseri had fallen silent. Makoto didn’t know if his body had gone into shock or something worse, was frankly terrified of discovering the answer, but Haruka had saved him from having to see the result of the attack by knocking the officer to the ground. Makoto pointedly kept his eyes fixed on Haruka as he carefully undid the restraints and pulled out the IV needle. Haruka stiffened at his first touch, but then he saw the necklace around Makoto’s neck and relaxed, even held his arms up so that Makoto could easily scoop him up from the bed.

He gave Haruka a cursory once-over, but aside from Iseri’s blood around his mouth (Makoto paled a bit at the sight of it, and quickly wiped it away with his shirt) and the small cut from where the needle had been, he seemed fine. Never mind the aphrodisiac coursing through his veins; that wasn’t anything physically harmful, and its effect seemed to have even worn off a little bit when Haruka attacked Iseri.

“We have to hurry,” Makoto whispered. “Someone’s bound to check in eventually.”

Actually, it was suspicious that Sasabe hadn’t already burst through the door. Iseri hadn’t exactly been quiet when Haruka bit him.

Makoto blinked in surprise as, when he cautiously slid the infirmary door open, he found the hallway completely deserted. Sasabe hadn’t manned his post. Not that that meant they were safe. Sasabe could have gone to get reinforcements. There could be an ambush waiting for them on the top deck, and the officers could have real weapons to use against them.

And none of that made a difference. There was only one way off this ship, and with the adrenaline pumping through his veins Makoto felt he could take down anyone who dared get in his way.

He adjusted his grip on Haruka, securing the _Sessa’_ s arms around his neck, and made his way down the narrow hall to the stairs that led to the upper deck. As they passed the room with the tanks, Makoto couldn’t pick up on any voices. Were the walls of the labs soundproof?  The office hadn’t been, since Sasabe and the other officer had been able to overhear the brief scuffle he’d gotten into with Seward before.

It didn’t make any sense. Even when he stumbled onto the deck and saw Nagisa waving his arms frantically, none of it registered.

“Makoto! And Haruka, too!”

He didn’t seem to be under anyone’s custody. In fact, Rei stood next to him, barking out orders to the surrounding officers and researchers. Makoto halted as a short woman – Dr. Amakata, he remembered, after a quick glance to her ID tag – ran up to him. Amakata held out her arms, but Makoto shied away from her, unwilling to hand Haruka over to anyone associated with Seward.

“You can trust Dr. Amakata,” Nagisa said as he bounded over to Makoto’s side.

“No offense,” Makoto said, “but I don’t trust anyone right now. How did you get here, Nagisa?”

Nagisa pouted. “Rei was able to get in touch with some friends in marine conservation. The news is in an uproar.” Noticing Makoto’s wide-eyed expression, he added quickly: “They don’t know anything about Haruka. Only that there was some cruel and unusual testing on animal subjects. That was enough to get the patrol boat out here. No one wants that bad press.”

Makoto shook his head. “How did you find the ship?”

“That would be me,” Amakata piped up. “I didn’t like the direction our research took since that woman took over, especially after the mermaid came on board. And I wasn’t the only one. I passed our coordinates off to Sasabe, and he was able to contact the patrol boat and send them our location.”

Haruka stirred, lifted his head to gaze out at the ocean. Makoto stroked his hair comfortingly. “So what now?” He wouldn’t trade Seward for another corrupt authority.

“I believe that’s up to you. As I understand it, the mermaid is your discovery.”

Makoto blinked. He’d been ready to physically fight anyone who got in his way, but hadn’t thought for a minute that Haruka’s fate would simply be left to him. “And if I choose to let him go?”

Amakata looked vaguely disappointed, and Makoto supposed he could understand that, being a student of science himself. He didn’t know how invested Amakata had been in researching sirens, but to have such an amazing discovery within grasp and having to watch it slip away would be upsetting for anyone. Nevertheless, she conceded. “It’s your choice. But before you do that, I think it’s best to wait for the drugs to exit his system.”

There was wisdom in that decision. It would be rash to simply let Haruka go in this condition, not when they had no idea where Rin or the others were. Who knew if Haruka could protect himself with what he had pumping through his veins. Against Iseri he’d held his own, but only because he’d taken his assailant by surprise.

“Let me take care of him for now. I promise he’ll be in shape to return home soon, and I won’t stop you then.”

Makoto weighed his options, and in the end Haruka’s wellbeing won out. Even if Haruka might resent him for forcing him back into the infirmary for another few hours, at least Makoto’s conscience wouldn’t be quite so heavy when he did let Haruka go.

He winced at the sudden pang in his heart. He really was going to let Haruka go; this would be the last time they saw each other – for sure this time, because after this Haruka most likely would never want to breach the surface again. And Makoto wouldn’t want him to, either; it was just too dangerous.

Amakata extended her arms again, and after Makoto assured Haruka that everything would be fine, he gently passed the _Sessa_ into her waiting arms.

And that was the precise moment the bullet entered his leg.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize that I am the absolute worst. You can insult me at un-bacio-dolce . tumblr . com


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took forever. This past month has seen me dragged down into Dragon Age hell and I don't really regret it...

The funny thing was, it didn’t hurt. Not at first.

Makoto had never really spent time imagining what it would be like to get shot, but he probably would have assumed he’d feel a bullet tearing through his body at over 300 meters per second. As it happened, he didn’t notice anything. Only that one moment he was standing perfectly upright, Haruka begrudgingly allowing himself to be passed off to Amakata, and the next he was writhing on the ship deck, the world reduced to white noise and frantic eyes.

Haruka’s eyes, Haruka’s face hovering just above his own. Voices shouting, muffled and indiscernible, and a single thought rotating in his mind – _so close, so close!_ So close to Haruka, so close to getting Haruka back where he belonged, so close to saying goodbye, so close to getting rid of their biggest threat, but he hadn’t. _So close._

The edges of Makoto’s vision fuzzed.

Then came pain. A stinging slap to his cheek, and the world came rushing back down upon Makoto.

He screamed.

It burned. It burned, it burned, it _burned_ , and that fire raced through his veins, igniting every nerve in his body and building to excruciation and flooding out of him. It poured through his eyes in tears, his mouth in screams, and his leg in a great red flower that bloomed ever outward, staining his clothes and the deck and Haruka’s tail, his perfect, slender hands...

“Haru—Haruka—” He couldn’t say anymore. Could barely focus on Haruka’s face, distorting and twisting and straightening out again. Makoto reached a trembling hand up but it froze midway in its path, his body convulsing violently against the deck.

“He’s losing too much...” A man – Rei? “…into shock.”

Haruka looked away, ocean breeze whipping his hair into disarray. He was beautiful. Makoto wished he could kiss him. Full lips parted, formed a word Makoto couldn’t quite make out, and then he whistled. Loud and shrill, a single note to penetrate the chaos, or bring about a chaos of its own. A call for Rin – for aid or revenge, Makoto didn’t know, but it was pointless.

 _He can’t hear_ , Makoto wanted to say. _He’s too far._

And Makoto didn’t want Rin to come. They couldn’t risk Mieko. If nothing else went right today, at least Mieko needed to live on.

“Water!” Haruka’s voice was more frantic than Makoto had ever heard, and it startled the surrounding group of Amakata, Nagisa, and Rei. Makoto himself was shocked to hear perfect Japanese from his lips when it finally registered what Haruka was asking for. He and Rin must really have practiced with the language, or else Haruka had found another way to learn. “Water” – Haruka paused, face screwed in concentration –“will make better.”

Rei gasped and nearly tripped over himself to get a closer look at Haruka. “He speaks Japanese?”

Haruka twisted away as Rei leaned in, his body protectively shifting over Makoto’s own, and showed his teeth. Clearly Rei wasn’t remembered fondly, and there was no mistaking that Haruka wouldn’t hesitate to bite the man again should he attempt to breach the invisible bubble of Haruka and Makoto’s personal space.

“Water.” Somehow Haruka made it sound like a threat – _water or else I tear you apart_. Laughter bubbled up from Makoto’s throat. Maybe he really was losing too much blood; he was already delirious.

“Uh...” Nagisa glanced warily over the edge of the ship. “Makoto can’t swim that well.”

“It may have hit an artery,” Amakata said. “Forget water, he needs medical attention. Professor Ryuugazaki, Hazuki-kun, I’ll need you to carry him back downstairs.”

Before they could even attempt to follow that order, Haruka shrieked. He raised himself up on his tail and curled over Makoto’s shaking body, and something about the pose reminded Makoto of an angry cat: eyes narrowed into thin slits, nails and teeth bared in warning, even the frills on his arms standing on end. This Haruka was leader of his pod, parent to too many lost children, defender against anything who dared touch what he’d claimed as _his_.

Nagisa raised his hands in submission. “Okay, okay, you win. Water it is.”

Mollified, Haruka’s gaze softened and turned back to Makoto. He reached a hand up and brushed Makoto’s bangs from his eyes. When Nagisa and Amakata knelt down beside them, Haruka let them lift Makoto and carry him to the edge of the ship. Rei followed with Haruka just after, Haruka pointedly avoiding looking at the man.

“So what, just toss you in?” Rei raised an eyebrow. Haruka nodded to the water and, looking uncertain all the while, Rei slowly eased the lithe body between the railings.

Anyone else wouldn’t have managed the fall gracefully, but Haruka extended his arms up over his head, back and neck arching like an Olympic star straight off the starting block. He slipped through the waves with barely a splash, and in an instant his powerful tail propelled him back to the surface, where he waited for Makoto.

Nagisa and Amakata exchanged worried looks, still clearly not sold on whatever plans Haruka formulated in his strange mind. Makoto couldn’t wait for them to come to their own decisions. Maybe he was biased for trusting Haruka so implicitly, or perhaps just stupid to spit in the face of actual medical science in favor of the healing capabilities of a merman, but time was running out. Makoto found a small amount of energy to roll himself forward, and flopped over the railing before either of his friends could stop him.

Death had always frightened him, almost as much as the ocean. But for some reason, even though he stood on the precipice, he wasn’t scared now. The water rose up to meet him. Makoto crashed through the surface with significantly less finesse than Haruka, and the dark thing that lived beneath the waves seemed to come alive with a growling hunger, sucking him deeper and deeper down into the endless blue.

_There’s something in the water..._

Makoto couldn’t fight it. His limbs were heavy - or completely numb, in the case of his wounded leg. All he could do was close his eyes and drift, resign himself to that fate he’d subconsciously always known awaited him.

_It wants to take me._

And then Haruka was there, breathing air into his lungs and caging him with arms and tail both. It was not stifling, as he might have thought it would be. Haruka surrounded him completely and carried him down, until the water turned murky and Haruka’s skin seemed to disappear, camouflaged by the surroundings.

 _Sirens lure their prey to the bottom of the ocean and devour them whole._ Wasn’t that how the story went? Well, Makoto was ready. His heart belonged to Haruka already – it had for the past three years – so why not the rest of him as well?

Haruka pushed his forehead to Makoto’s and his hand slipped down to Makoto’s leg. Makoto hissed, air bubbles rushing from his mouth, so Haruka kissed him again, pried his mouth open and forced air down his throat.

“ _Sjahlaa_ ,” Haruka whispered in that strange way of his, where the sound emitted from somewhere other than his mouth. The word rang in Makoto’s mind, and somehow he knew what it meant. “ _Sjahlaa_.” _Silence._

He could have obeyed easily, had Haruka continued to kiss him like this, soft and coaxing, tongue sliding playfully over Makoto’s. He could have died happily in Haruka’s arms like this, his final moments sweet and pleasurable. But Haruka would not let him go without a fight. Not Haruka. Selfish, stubborn, amazing Haruka.

Haruka swallowed the howl that would have torn from Makoto’s throat, constricted his tail around Makoto as Makoto began to thrash against him in search of respite from the merciless fingers that dug into the circular wound, sorted through flesh and muscle in search of the bullet. It must have been lodged too deep, however, for Haruka’s efforts turned more and more frenzied with each passing second.

Makoto wanted to tell him to stop, urge him to leave it be. He’d done everything he could to set Haruka free, and he’d known from the start the risk of himself getting hurt in the process. No, he hadn’t thought things would actually come to this, but... Sacrificing everything for the one he loved wasn’t the worst way to go. In fact, his only regret was that he didn’t have the chance to say a proper goodbye to his friends and family.

Suddenly Haruka’s mouth was gone. Makoto blinked and was surprised to find through the sting of salt only an empty stretch of the ocean before him.

Then teeth, razor-sharp and unforgiving, tearing into his flesh. It hurt just as much as the previous times he’d been bit – only this time he knew the intention was not to harm or warn away. In his desperation Haruka had resorted to actually trying to bite the damn bullet out of him.

Water flooded his mouth, blackness creeping around the edges of his vision. He couldn’t breathe without Haruka, but his leg could not be healed without Haruka. This was futile, and since it was so, Makoto mustered the strength to tear Haruka away. He wouldn’t waste his last moments struggling, tortured by the very mouth he’d rather kiss. Better to be lulled into the great beyond, tricked just a little while longer into believing everything would be all right.

There were tears in Haruka’s eyes, when they met Makoto’s again. Makoto’s heart lurched in his chest, and it was far worse than the screaming pain in his leg and shriveling lungs. “ _Llo ffha_.” Haruka gave a brief, despairing sound, features scrunching in grief, and pushed his cheek to Makoto’s chest. “ _Naraei_!”

This was better. As much as he hated the thought of Haruka crying over him, at least now Makoto could close his eyes. Relax into the gentle hold of this incredible, unfathomable creature he’d found and come to love by accident, and quietly slip away.

Yes, if he had to say goodbye... he would do so smiling.

* * * *

_A long time ago, a man fell into the sea._

_Thrown overboard, left to die, but unbeknownst to the crew who deserted him, someone decided he was worth saving. A beautiful woman with flowing brown hair sang to him in the whistling voice of the ocean and carried him to shore. Delicate but strong, she appeared a normal woman at first. It was only after the pounding in his head subsided and the man's vision cleared that he noticed the magnificent tail curled around them in the sand._

_He was not afraid, for despite her pointed teeth she had a kind disposition, and the looks she gave him were innocently curious rather than ill intentioned._

_Tachibana, he called her, after the orange sheen of her tail._

_On the island, he built himself a lean-to, which soon became a hut, which before long became a structure that could pass for a modest home. Everything he needed the island supplied, be it food or reinforcements for his shelter, and most importantly, he could see Tachibana as often as he desired. And as time passed, his desire to see her only grew. At first they met sparingly; he would catch a glimpse of her flukes on the horizon and approach the shore with a caution she shared. But very quickly they established a routine, and by the start of his second month on the island, their rendezvous were a nightly affair._

_He taught her the ways of the land, and she in turn gifted him with secrets of the ocean. Language was only a minimal problem, as they were both eager to learn, and thus both able to pick up on each other's patterns of speech and the meanings behind them._

_One night they lay beside one another, having talked until the moon nearly completed its cycle, and just as the sun's first rays burst through, Tachibana leaned over and kissed him. They were young and endlessly curious about each other, and once the initial threshold had been crossed - the barrier that separated them from friendly companions to something more - there was no finding restraint in either of them._

_It did not work so differently between their kinds as he might have imagined. She was patient with him as she guided him over herself, presented him with the treasure of the ocean and let him take. Perhaps it was a sin against nature - after all, such differing species as theirs should never have even crossed paths, much less come together so intimately - but the man could not bring himself to regret._

_Especially when, a year later, they birthed their first son._

_They let him carry his mother's name, for the man wanted nothing to do with the ordinary life from before he met Tachibana. Together they created the first of a new kind. The first human to carried the ocean inside of himself._

_And he was not the last._

* * * *

"You're awake."

Makoto twitched, then blinked his eyes open. The hazy image of Rin pieced itself together before him and Makoto opened his mouth, inhaled a large stream of water— and it passed through him. Down his throat and out of him somewhere, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

He panicked. Rin intervened instantaneously, one hand placating on Makoto’s arm and the other gently soothing over the thrashing orange tail.

A tail – _his tail_ – for god’s sake, he had a tail! With scales, and frills, and fins at the base and where his pelvic bones should have met. What was going on? It had to be a dream; that was the only explanation that made even a shred of sense. Makoto closed his eyes, held his breath, and willed himself to wake up again on the deck of the ship.

A dream. He must have passed out from exhaustion, from the blood loss. Yes, that’s right, he was shot. Definitely the blood loss, or maybe he was hallucinating – _what happened to Seward, wake the fuck up, Makoto!_

Makoto raised his hands to slap the sides of his face, but Rin beat him to it. Instead of the desired effect of stunning himself awake, however, it only created a stinging imprint on his left cheek. Brows furrowed, Makoto rubbed at the spot. “Not a dream then,” he murmured – or tried to. All that came out was a rush of air, bubbles racing to the surface.

Rin snorted. “Doesn’t work like that.” Makoto watched him as he spoke, still half in a daze, and just like Haruka, Rin’s mouth didn’t even twitch once during the process. With an exaggerated roll of the eyes Rin hooked Makoto by the underarms, then dragged him up. The water rushed over him, through him, and before Makoto knew it they were laying on a rock above the surface. This was at least familiar, even if their location wasn’t, and so Makoto breathed deeply, enjoyed how human it made him feel just to watch his chest expand as he inhaled.

After a moment, Makoto chanced a look down at his tail. Glistening orange scales winked back at him. How was it possible? “Where’s Haruka?”

Rin’s expression softened minutely as he jerked his chin toward water. “Resting. It wasn’t easy, what he did for you. A lot more complicated than patching up a little bite. If he’d been on his own I don’t think he could have done it. It would have drained too much of his own energy.”

Of course there was a price. Nothing in the world came free, not even for the _Sessa_. Makoto swished his tail contemplatively to the side, wondered what it took to completely reconstruct something from the waist down. Fuse legs into a single, elongated spinal column. “Did you help him?” He remembered Haruka calling out to Rin when they were still aboard the ship. He hadn’t thought Rin would be able to hear, but he supposed he had a lot to learn still about the world he’d unknowingly and without consent been thrust into.

Rin shook his head. “Males of our kind do not possess strong magic. Not strong enough for something like this.”

A _Sessa_ he wasn’t familiar with, then. A female, with whom Rin and Haruka were obviously close enough to trust with healing Makoto.

Makoto laughed hollowly. “I’m surprised you let him heal me.” Rin was Haruka’s protector first and foremost, and put nothing before the safety of _Sessmalla_ and their pod. Up until this point, Makoto considered himself little more than a thorn in the _Kallotom_ ’s side, an aggravation Rin would happily dispel to revert his and Haruka’s life to the way it had been before Makoto and Haruka met.

“He loves you,” Rin shot back, mistaking Makoto’s self-deprecating humor for insult. “It would have devastated him to lose you. That’s why I brought Aiichiro along. She would’ve been able to heal you even without Haru’s help.”

“He’s awake,” a shy voice interjected before Makoto could ask any more questions.

Makoto tipped his head to the side, spotting the small, silver figure that drifted up alongside Rin – Aiichiro, he presumed. Petite but muscular, she reminded Makoto a bit of what Nagisa looked like before he’d hit his final growth spurt – only with the addition of a sunflower-yellow tail.

She hesitantly swam closer, eyes roving the length of Makoto’s body, until she sat beside him on the outcropping. “What a magnificent tail. A mark of Tachibana, no doubt.”

Makoto frowned. “How do you know my last name?” He didn’t even think he’d told Haruka that.

The female looked to Rin. If Makoto hadn't already known Rin and Haruka to be mates, he would have assumed these two were together, what with the affection with which they regarded each other. Her expression was more open than Rin's, while Rin’s was laced more with guarded concern. Siblings, maybe? But they didn’t look anything alike.

"Did Haru know?" Aiichiro wondered

"Know what?" What did his last name have to do with anything?

Rin shrugged. "Who can say when it comes to him? You know he barely opens up."

With a sigh, Aiichiro moved away from the flat rock Makoto laid upon. Their conversation continued, not that Makoto could make any sense of it, and it only increased his frustration. With a growl, he made to sit up.

Rin pushed him right back down. "Your body is not adjusted to the transition yet."

"Then tell me what the hell is going on." Makoto wasn't quick to anger, but he was so over holding his tongue at this point. He wanted answers, wanted to see Haruka, and his family – _oh god_ , would he ever be able to see his family again? What about Rei and Nagisa?

"Your leg was torn up very badly," Aiichiro explained, sympathetic. Her Japanese was surprisingly good - not quite as flawless as Rin's, but far better than Haruka's. "And we know little of human anatomy. We removed the... object in your leg, but to repair the damage, at least in a way that would give you proper mobility, was beyond us."

"So you gave me a tail?" Could they do that? Well, obviously they could, the evidence of that grew two yards long beneath Makoto's abdomen, shimmering in the dying sunlight.

"I didn't give you anything you did not already possess."

"I'm pretty sure before today I didn’t have a tail."

"Don't talk to Aiichiro like that," Rin snapped. "You'd have died if not for her."

Aiichiro blushed. " _Kallot'kar_..." She calmed Rin with a placating touch to his shoulder, smiled even as he grumbled irritably. "You said Tachibana was your name?” Pale blue eyes turned on Makoto inquisitively. “I sensed something ancient about your blood. Tachibana is our ancestor, the very first child of Malla. The legend is she fell in love with a human, a sailor, and through them a new species was born. A species that could live either above or below the surface."

Makoto's mind reeled. He’d heard similar legends, but usually in those the mermaid was taken by force. The stories rarely mentioned a consensual relationship, and they certainly never included the twist of the baby. Not even Seward’s book. "But I... I've never..." When Mieko left the ocean for the first time, his tail split into legs. Makoto's legs never fused into a tail when he'd gone into the ocean.

"The blood is watered down, but still very much the blood of our kind. It just needed a bit of-" Aiichiro paused, searching for the right word - "coaxing."

“And you were able to... sense this?”

Aiichiro ducked her head demurely, began to play with her long braid of silver hair. “I have very keen senses,” she said, humble through it all. “It is why the _Kallotom_ accepted me, even though I am female.”

“And she’s strong,” Rin put in. “She could have been _Sesshulla_ of her own pod, if she’d wanted.”

“Thank you, _Kallot’kar_.” It was difficult to tell, with how she’d turned to hide her face, but Makoto was sure she was blushing.

Definitely not siblings.

“I still don’t understand,” Makoto said, veering them back on topic. Even if he was a descendant of the first _Sessmalla_ , how could they completely transform his species? Especially since the last thing he could remember was bleeding out in Haruka’s arms.

“There was no way for you to be both human and _Sessa_. Your human body was dying, and there was no way we could save it. Haruka was killing himself just trying – the energy required to mend a wound like that – and he wasn’t at his full strength to begin with. Even with my helping him...” Her voice trailed off, and she met his gaze with genuine sorrow. “I wish there had been another way, but this was all we could do.”

Makoto could not bring himself to be angry with her – or even with Rin or Haruka. It had been a hopeless situation, and they hadn’t needed to help him at all. They could have just decided he was a lost cause and left him to die, but instead he’d been given another chance at life, in a world most could only dream of. And a chance to spend that life not just with the person he loved, but with his son, too; both of whom he’d thought he was doomed to part ways with. Most would happily trade their legs to get what Makoto had been given.

_But the price..._

Makoto glanced to the side, taking in the unfamiliar surroundings. The rock Rin brought him to was hidden within a growth of marshy trees connected to what seemed from where he sat an uninhabited little island, far away from any prying human eyes. Far away from the ship, too, if Makoto had to guess. That didn’t bother Makoto very much. He was sure with Amakata, Rei, and Sasabe taking control, Seward wouldn’t be able to do further damage. What burned Makoto up was the thought of never being able to come into contact with any of them again. “Will I ever get to see my family?” Because they hadn’t heard from him in at least a few days, and he couldn’t just disappear without any sort of warning. He couldn’t do that to his parents, his siblings.

Aiichiro and Rin exchanged looks, all the answer Makoto needed.

He shrugged Aiichiro’s hand away when she attempted to comfort him. This wasn’t a wound that could be healed, not even with the magic she possessed.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Harass me at un-bacio-dolce.tumblr.com
> 
> \---------  
> SESSLO’ÔNG TO ENGLISH DICTIONARY
> 
> Kallot’kar: a form of address from one Kallotom to another, usually a junior to an elder.
> 
> Kallotom (kayo-tome): hunter/warrior, often travels close to the surface in search for food and to ensure an area is clear of predators; can also be used as a plural for a group of hunters
> 
> Llo ffha (yoh-fah): mine (belonging to me)
> 
> Naraei: stop 
> 
> Sessa (sess-ah): an average mermaid or merman, or a group of mer
> 
> Sessmalla (sess-mah-yah): child of Malla; chosen of mermaids (reserved for third gender only)
> 
> Sjahlaa: silence/be quiet. 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the 'last' chapter, and probably my favorite to write even if it was difficult. 
> 
> There will be a small epilogue to follow. :) Thanks for following along with this story and putting up with my delays in getting the re-post up!

The hardest part - and who was he kidding, between completely relearning to swim, speak, and pretty much perform any basic function, Makoto was nearly at his wit’s end - was having to stay away from the surface. Even disregarding the gaping hole in his chest at being torn away from his former life, he was, at heart, still human. No matter what might run in his blood, he was raised on land, a lover of the light and never sturdier than with solid ground beneath his feet. Now there was no ground, no feet. Only drifting and propelling forward, awkwardly trying to direction himself without relying too heavily on his arms. The _Sessa_ made it look so effortless, moving with the tides, arms flowing gracefully behind them. And even the brightest morning light only penetrated so far past the water's surface. Adjusting to seeing anything in the murky depths would take time, and Makoto hadn't the best eyesight even as a human.

Talking proved another great challenge. Luckily Aiichiro was a patient teacher. Makoto liked her a lot, would honestly say she was his favorite member of the pod he'd been allowed to meet so far – after, of course, Haruka and Mieko, the latter of which was a frequent lurker during Makoto's lessons, making himself more of a distraction that anything else. The moment the little _Sessa_ darted into his line of sight, Makoto abandoned any lesson he was in the middle of to smother him with attention, which Mieko preened under.

Haruka would not see him. This was not due to a lack of wanting, as Makoto initially feared, but just another bizarre tradition of the species. Now that Makoto was _Sessa_ , he could officially be taken as Haruka's mate - and chosen as Haruka's partner, the closest of all his mates, if Haruka so desired - but that could not happen without a certain ceremony. And Makoto could not participate in the ceremony until he'd at least mastered the basics of being _Sessa_.

It was a challenge, not having Haruka to help him cope, but at least he was allowed to spend time with Mieko.

"The ceremony is a big deal. The partnering won't be seen as official without it."

A very human mentality, especially where religious ceremonies were involved. In most faiths a marriage was not official unless it took place in a church. Makoto wondered if it was the same with the _Sessa_. They did not have a religion so much as Makoto could tell, but the sun - _Malla_ \- was significant to them, almost on the level of a goddess, even if they did not have churches with which to honor her.

Makoto gestured upward, and Aiichiro nodded. " _Malla_ must witness the couple dance," she explained.

Makoto froze. "Dance?" Speaking as the _Sessa_ did still came unnaturally to him. At the most he could generally manage no more than a sentence or two at a time. A big improvement for the mere three days they'd been working on it, but still not at a level to gain Rin's stern approval.

"The mating dance," Aiichiro clarified. They currently lounged in the small cavern that served as her home, which had hosted almost all their lessons thus far. " _Nulpaar_."

" _Nulpaar_!" Mieko chirped from the entryway. With an enthusiastic whistle he performed a flourishing little twirl. " _Nulpaar_!"

"It is a very joyous occasion." Aiichiro smiled and ruffled Mieko's hair. "And the _Nulpaar_ of _Sessmalla_ is the most joyous of all. Even my clan will attend."

Makoto learned earlier that Aiichiro was not originally a member of Haruka's pod, though he hadn't been given many details about how their union came to be. Frankly he wasn't sure if he desired the whole truth. He liked Aiichiro; the last thing he wanted was to grow jealous of her over something neither of them had control over. There were more important things to worry about than Haruka's relationships with his other mates, anyways. And considering the hints that Haruka would choose him as his partner above the natural-born _Sessa_ he'd already taken as mates, it would be petty of Makoto to feel jealous.

If anyone should feel cheated, it was Aiichiro. She'd been in a position to take over as leader of her own pod, if Rin's boastings were to be taken as truth. She'd left that behind for Haruka, and now Haruka was choosing someone else.

"Thank you," Makoto said suddenly. He bowed his head, trying to conjure the right word from the small pool of _Sessa_ vocabulary he'd learned thus far. " _Ll-llo graes_." Aiichiro tilted her head, either unable to understand his still-horrid pronunciation or genuinely uncertain of what Makoto thanked her for, he wasn't sure, so he tried his best to elaborate, cheeks flushing. "For helping."

Aiichiro smiled warmly and began to play with her long braid, a habit he noticed she picked up when nervous or flustered. "We do what we can to make our partners happy. Thanks are not necessary."

"Still... Haruka was yours."

She shook her head, a small laugh bubbling past her lips. "Oh, never," she said. A surreptitious glance to Mieko, who was distracted with playing with the frills on Makoto's tail - running his fingers over them and nuzzling every so often - and she lowered her voice a fraction. "Haru is my mate, but he was never mine."

Suddenly he could read the truth clear as day in her pale eyes, and his heart went out for her even while he did not have the proper words to offer sympathy.

Makoto did not question Aiichiro cared for Haruka; she did not love him as a mate should, however, and she would probably never love him that way. But when _Sessmalla_ courted a mate, Makoto supposed there was no way to turn him down. Makoto didn't ask questions. He could tell Aiichiro didn't want him to. The wound was still too raw, or perhaps it had never healed to begin with.

Aiichiro excused herself shortly afterwards with a soft, "I have other duties to attend."

Makoto just watched her go, silent, the fact not lost on him that in her need for space she had not asked him to leave, despite his having intruded in her home. Selfless and submissive to a fault; Makoto could see why Haruka had chosen her in contrast to the brazen Rin, but there was still too much he did not know, the web of _Sessa_ politics far more intricate than he ever would have imagined.

“ _Sjilla_?"

Makoto sighed, scrubbed at his face with his new, strangely webbed hands, and looked back down to Mieko, whose small arms hugged at his tail. He forced a smile to his lips and leaned down to gather the boy in his arms. In the water Mieko weighed practically nothing, making it easy for Makoto to carry him from Aiichiro's home into the reef beyond.

It was a sight he didn't think he'd ever get used to: corals of every imaginable color, hollowed out in places to create the entrances to the homes within. Sea grass swayed in the light current, small fish darting in and out amongst them as the _Sessa_ went about their daily business. They were a rather docile bunch, when there was not some task to complete. Most were content to lounge around on flat rocks, the only form of sunbathing they could really do this far beneath the waves. Children raced each other; their playful whistles and clicks carrying happily over the reef. Farther beyond the perimeter of their pod's claimed sea, the _Kallotom_ patrolled. When they returned around sun-fall with the day's hunt the pod usually became more alive. Meals were prepared, shared together amidst song and laughter and, occasionally, performance.

Not that Makoto had been invited to witness any of it, as he still was not considered an official member of the pod. An outsider until he and Haruka completed whatever mating dance... ritual... traditionally required, Makoto took his own meals in Rin's coral dwelling, which was where he swam to now.

Eyes followed him all the way, but no one approached him. Makoto tried not to let it bother him.

Unsurprisingly, Rin was not there. Being _Kallotom_ , he would not return still for several hours. The only reason Aiichiro had been permitted to skip out on her own patrols was because she had taken to training Makoto.

Two females occupied the space, only one of whom Makoto had met before. As the previous leader of the pod and second highest authority after Haruka, Rin’s mother Nori had come not long after Makoto had awoken after his transformation, and the same disquiet he’d felt then slithered down the back of his neck now as she locked her narrow tawny eyes on him.

“Lessons finished already?” Nori asked.

Mieko whistled enthusiastically, catapulting out of Makoto’s arms and swimming up to the younger of the two females. From the uncanny resemblance, Makoto could only assume her another relative of Rin’s. Instead of crimson, however, her tail shimmered a vibrant magenta. She hugged Mieko tightly and smiled at Makoto in greeting.

“Aiichiro was busy,” Makoto explained. He watched as Nori patted Mieko’s hair with reserved fondness. Try as he might, he couldn’t picture her as an overly affectionate mother.

“I guess it can’t be helped, then. The pod is getting impatient, as I’m sure you are as well. Haruka and I have decided you should not delay _Nulpaar_ much longer.”

Makoto sighed in relief. He didn’t think he could stomach if they’d decided on the opposite.

Nori gestured to the younger _Sessa_. “This is Gou, Rin’s younger sister.”

Gou scrunched her nose. “How many times have I told you? I prefer _Kou_.” She glared at her mother.

Nori rolled her eyes, and Makoto suspected they’d had this argument many times before. “Gou is a strong name. You should be proud of it.”

“It sounds so masculine...”

“You do not seem to mind when Seijirou calls you Gou.”

At that, Gou pursed her lips, any fight that may have been left instantly leaving her. Cheeks prettily flushed, she turned her head in a way that reminded Makoto very much of Haruka. The wave of longing he’d tried desperately to suppress washed over him. “Nice to meet you,” he said, focusing on her cheerful eyes instead of the aching in his chest. “I’m Makoto.”

Gou smiled again, swimming up to his side. “I know. I’ve been waiting years to meet you.”

Makoto blinked several times, thrown for a loop by the comment. “Um, years?”

“Since Mieko was born.” She tickled under Mieko’s chin, and they all delighted in his shriek of laughter. “It was obvious right away he wasn’t Rin’s, and Haru’s not shy. He told everyone the child came from a human’s seed.”

Color rushed to Makoto’s cheeks. “S-sorry.”

Gou tilted her head. “What for?”

“If I’d known there were others... That is, when Haruka and I—when we... I had no idea...”

A giggle spared him any further embarrassment explaining himself. “That is nothing to be sorry for. Everyone is happy Haru was finally able to conceive. His other attempts... were not so lucky.”

“Rin told me. I can’t imagine.”

Gou frowned, a shadow passing briefly over her eyes. “It was very hard on both of them,” she said. She ran her fingers through Mieko’s hair and he yawned, nuzzling at her bosom. “Ah, I think he’s hungry.”

“Bring him to _Sessmalla,”_ Nori instructed. With a nod, Gou excused herself. Makoto wished he could follow but knew better than to ask. “Gou is partners with Seijirou _bi_ Mikoshiba of the Samezuka clan,” Nori said, capturing his attention once again. “Unless Seijirou is away training the apprentice _Kallotom_ in the Cold Sea, she lives with them. The journey from their territory to ours is a half a day’s swim. Tomorrow morning, she will return to Samezuka and give word of _Sessmalla_ ’s _Nulpaar_. With luck, we should be able to celebrate _Nulpaar_ in another day’s time with all who wish to attend.”

Makoto took a seat on a carved piece of coral. A tail grew tired just as legs did. “I’m glad.”

For the first time, Nori offered him a smile. “You’ve done well. I imagine it’s not easy for a human to adjust to our way of life.”

“It’s different,” Makoto agreed, “but I’ll get used to it. And I’ll get to be with Haruka and Mieko, so I shouldn’t complain. But...”

Nori regarded him evenly, a finger to her chin. “You are unhappy.”

“No!” Makoto waved his hand quickly, as if the words had physically escaped into the ocean and he could erase them. He wasn’t unhappy. He was lucky to be alive, honored that Haruka and Rin and Aiichiro had risked so much to save him, and blessed for the chance to be with the person he loved, have a real family with him. But he could not forget the price he’d paid for this second chance. “I just... Never got to say goodbye.”

“To your humans?”

“My family,” Makoto said. “I have parents, and a brother and sister. I have friends... they helped save Haruka.” He hung his head. “They don’t even know if I’m alive.”

“You wish to see them again,” Nori said. She didn’t sound very pleased, and of course Makoto understood why. It would be a stupid and inconsiderate risk for him to go anywhere near humans right now.

Makoto didn’t need to see them. He wanted to, just as much as he wanted to be able to see Haruka. But more than that...

“I just want them to know I’m okay.”

For a long moment, Nori was silent. Then she took Makoto’s hand, gave it a gentle squeeze. “I’ll see what I can do,” she said.

* * * *

It was another two days, not one, but no amount of time would have sufficiently prepared Makoto for _Nulpaar_. More _Sessa_ than he could have imagined packed the reef, pearls and precious stones glittering at their wrists and throats, and they all for a better view of _Sessmalla_ ’s chosen partner. The story of and Haruka and his former-human partner had spread even to neighboring pods, so Iwatobi and Samezuka clans were not the only in attendance.

Closest to the front Makoto spied Mieko, practically draped over Rin’s back with his arms around the _Kallotom_ ’s shoulders. Beside them were Aiichiro, Gou, and by far one of the largest _Sessa_ Makoto had seen yet. A redhead with mischievous gold eyes and shark-like jade tail, whom Makoto could only assume was Gou’s mate Seijirou.

As he stopped at the center of the gathering, Makoto caught his first glimpse of Haruka, and he wondered how any of the _Sessa_ ’s eyes could have strayed elsewhere.

The color had returned to Haruka’s cheeks, all the wounds from his time aboard the research vessel long since healed. The evening light cast an almost blue glow to his hair, making his eyes stand out all the more. He wore a necklace at his throat, several layers of braided seaweed strung with crystalized scales of many different colors. It held Makoto’s focus for a brief moment, and then it was immediately drawn right back to Haruka’s face.

A tiny, knowing smile tugged at Haruka’s lips. Makoto wanted to call him smug, but his brain refused to supply him with the words.

The celebration commenced without delay. Nori led the ceremony. She’d been the leader of the pod before Haruka, or so he’d been told, so it was only natural she assume this duty. She spoke in the old _Sessa_ tongue, only bits and pieces of which Makoto could pick out and even less of which his mind properly translated. If he tried he was sure he could make sense of it, but Haruka distracted him from paying better attention.

Small pearls dotted his hair, which caught Makoto by surprise. He hadn’t taken Haruka as one for such decoration, but he supposed it was only fitting on such an important day. Wearing only the necklace Haruka had given him three years ago, Makoto felt underdressed – if that was the right word.

After Nori’s blessing would come the dance. Aiichiro had been his partner when practicing that. Rin instructed him on what would come after, when the communal ceremony ended. The consummation of—

“Makoto.”

Makoto jumped, eyes widening. Several titters from the crowd made him blush, and he ducked his head in embarrassment. He had no idea what was going on, where in the ceremony they were. Pleadingly he caught Haruka’s gaze.

The little smile sharpened into an amused smirk, but Haruka handed him a razor-edged shell. Makoto took it in a more secure grasp and watched as Haruka used the other half of the shell to make a clean slice through his left palm.

 _“Peshjiuun llo bi lle ffha.”_ Haruka spoke softly, harkening memories of three years ago when he left Makoto on the beach with only a necklace and vague hope they’d be together again. Now there was no question about it. “ _Haruka bi lle ffha, Makoto bi llo ffha, suumëv Malla bi sjilla hehellôn.”_

Now it was Makoto’s turn to speak, recite the vow. He inhaled deeply, concentrated on the water as it filtered through his gills, and brought the severed shell to his palm. Steeling himself, he made a shallow cut. The blood hardly beaded the wound before Haruka’s hand gripped his, and the sting of the open cuts against each other almost made him wince. “P-Pesh-gee-un _llo... bi lle ffha_.” Makoto’s cheeks flushed. He knew the pronunciation was horrible, Rin would probably chew him out for messing up such an important ceremony later, but right now Haruka nodded his head, a subtle encouragement to give him the strength to keep going. “ _Makoto bi lle ffha_.” He knew that part well enough. “ _Haruka bi llo ffha_. Soo-mev—soo-mev Malla s-shyaa.. heheh-yon.”

And that was it. Witnessed by a gathering of several pods, they’d claimed each other. There was no exchanging of rings, as in a human marriage, only the clasping of hands, the brief mingling of blood to show their unity.

Someone at the front of the crowd began to clap – Gou, a quick glance revealed. Her mate picked up the steady beat at once, and then Aiichiro and Rin. As if that were the magic cue, Mieko enthusiastically clapped as well, throwing off the timing a bit, but it was soon corrected by the several dozen _Sessa_ who added to the beat with their own hands.

The dance began with the female partner, in this case Haruka. As soon as Mieko was fully weaned (which should be soon; he was rather behind with this, and a youngling too attached to his mother's breast was apparently considered weak) Makoto had no doubt Haruka would return to his preferred male form. Makoto honestly didn't care if Haruka's body changed or not. There was an undeniably attractive softness to him in his female form, his alluring curves quick to draw the eye, but his male form was what Makoto had first been introduced to, what Makoto had fallen in love with.

For now the graceful movements of Haruka's body captivated him, and for once there was no taboo associated with being drawn in. His enchantment was allowed - expected, even. Haruka twirled slowly, showed himself off as he weaved an entrancing pattern through the water with his hands. Pearlescent skin glittered as his arms crisscrossed over his head. Haruka tossed his hair back, eyes half-lidded and beckoning, and as he swept his arms out and sent a rush of water over Makoto, Makoto caught a whiff of that familiar and tantalizing smell.

 _Maessui,_ they called it. The oil produced by only female _Sessa,_ used to attract a mate.

Three years' worth of suppressed desire surged through Makoto's veins, and he hated that he could not yet act on it. He wanted to pull Haruka into his arms, devour his lips and spend eternity relearning the secrets of his body.

But all he could do was take the hand Haruka extended toward him, shiver as Haruka twirled into him, and inhale as a silky hand passed over his cheek.

The _Sessa_ began to chant, a low hymn in time with their clapping.

_Malla, Malla, Le-le Malla_

_Le-le Malla, Malla_

_Sjahlaa, Malla, Sjahlaa_

_Le-le, bi nulma_

Makoto kissed the palm of Haruka's hand, his own free hand moving up to card through silky black hair. Haruka’s _maessui_ clouded his senses in a pleasurable haze, and Makoto had to force himself to pull back, move away from Haruka as the dance required before moving back in again. 

Haruka smirked, clicked his tongue in playful reprimand as if to say ‘ _control yourself.’_

Makoto blushed. He wanted to respond, but he also didn't want to do anything to break protocol. The last thing he needed was more criticism from Rin and the other more judgmental _Sessa_.

He came forward again, holding both of Haruka’s hands out to the side. They made a slow turn together, and then Haruka’s tail curved around Makoto’s, pulling them flush against one another.

It was embarrassing to be so close in front of an audience, sharing something that should be intimate with a crowd. But Haruka’s presence gave him the strength not to shy away.

_Paar, Malla_

_Sjahlaa paar_

_Bi Sessa illenaar_

_Malla, paar nulma_

They turned again, arms making another slow arc, before Haruka lowered his tail and Makoto instead twined around him. Balance, the way of partnership; one mate was never more in control than the other. Responsibilities were shared, and love flowed evenly between the pair.

_Paar, Malla_

_Malla paar nulma_

_Paar Sessa, lle bahswi_

Both their tails lowered, so now they were only wrapped in each other’s arms. The voice of the song changed from prayerful to celebratory.

_Nulpaar, Nulpaar!_

_Sessa illenaar bi paar_

_Malla, sjilla, paar lli_

_Le-le, bi Nulpaar!_

The dance ended with their left hands, still bearing the mark from the verbal ceremony, over each other’s hearts. As the last notes of the song died away, a steady cheer rose to take its place.

Makoto no longer cared if it was proper or not. The dance was over, and as far as he knew it was the last of the ancient ritual. On impulse he tightened his arms around Haruka and spun them freely, as a real groom might after hearing the first trumpets of the wedding march, and planted a quick kiss on lips parted slightly in surprise. When he released Haruka they were both somewhat red in the face, and the glare Haruka aimed at him was equal parts stern and affectionately amused.

Being underwater in no way inhibited celebration. The _Sessa_ borrowed every resource, turning even the most mundane into decoration or instrument to add to the festivities. Shells and dead corals were repurposed into something resembling drums, slapped together to create a steady beat to which the less reserved of _Sessa_ (Makoto spotted Seijirou automatically, towering over the rest) could dance. Makoto and Haruka were given a seat of honor, literally carved from rock at a higher vantage point over the reef, to watch over the festivity, where members of the pod and those who had travelled to attend _Nulpaar_ could come and offer their congratulations.

Many were eager for the opportunity to finally converse with Makoto, though most left disillusioned when it turned out he did not exactly conform to whatever they’d assumed from their human folklore. No, a human’s skin color did not indicate whether or not they were poisonous, and no, the hair on the arms and legs did not sting like a jellyfish’s tentacles. It was a wonder Haruka had wanted to touch him at all when they’d first met, given all the bizarre superstitions. Haruka had been curious from the start, never hesitated to poke and prod at Makoto’s legs and pull at the little hairs that had grown on his foreleg.

“ _Sjilla_!”

Makoto and Haruka’s attention deviated immediately as Mieko wriggled through the small crowd of _Sessa_ gathered before them. A tired Aiichiro followed closely behind, murmuring apologies to those Mieko had so carelessly pushed aside. Makoto’s expression almost softened until he heard the disapproving click from Haruka. Mieko slouched, lower lip jutting out at the obvious scolding. He gave a despondent rendition of Haruka’s calling sound, and Makoto’s heart immediately went out to him.

Aiichiro supplied the exact thought that crossed Makoto’s mind.  “I think he’s feeling neglected.”

This was the first social event that he could attend with both of his parents; of course Mieko would want all of their attention on him. Well, social customs could be damned. Mieko was his son, and Makoto would not ignore him for strangers. He let Mieko pull him away from the rock, reached out and grabbed Haruka’s hand too before he could protest. Haruka turned his face stubbornly to the side but allowed himself to be carried along to the heart of the celebration.

Makoto had no practice in the way the _Sessa_ danced outside of the mating ritual, but he didn’t care. He had Haruka in his arms, their son in between them and giggling happily, and nothing could have been more right.

* * * *

It was not a little coral dwelling they retired to that night, as Makoto assumed it would be, but rather a sandbar a little further out from the pod’s territory. Discomfort itched at the base of Makoto’s spine the farther Haruka led him, Haruka’s hand in his the only thing that kept him from bolting back to the familiarity of the reef. “Is this... safe?” he wondered, unable to shake the jitters even as he watched Haruka lay back on the nearest mound of sand. His eyesight had gotten better over the past view days, and the water at the sandbar was clearer even than that of the reef, but still... This was open water. They were completely alone – which was good, considering what they were about to do, but also... completely terrifying for the same reason. They were about to be in a very vulnerable position, in a place where anyone – or anything – could wander across their path.

Haruka tugged on Makoto’s hand and Makoto obeyed the summoning, drifted down to him and let Haruka chase away all the worries in his mind with a slow, thorough kiss. “My place.” He licked at Makoto’s bottom lip, huffing in frustration as Makoto turned to glance nervously over his shoulder. “Safe, I promise.”

A gentle current sent a stream of cool water over them, and Makoto shivered. Haruka lay back against the sand, hooding his eyes, and reached his left hand up. The thin cut on the palm caught Makoto’s attention, the realization of the ceremony they just completed settling like a warm weight in his belly. His own hand bore the same scar. It would heal very soon, but the promise would remain. He and Haruka were bound forever.

“Makoto?”

Makoto shook his head, a giddy grin tugging at his lips. “I’m happy,” he explained. “I didn’t think I’d ever... And now I’m with you.” He hid the growing smile in Haruka’s neck, certain his sentimentality would make Haruka scoff or roll his eyes.

Instead, Haruka began to lightly pepper kisses down the side of his face, starting at his temple and working his way to his jaw. His tail moved beneath them, sliding up over the length of Makoto’s tail and back down again, trying to elicit reaction. That was Haruka, getting straight to the point. They were here to mate, and so they should mate. Makoto scooted away, hands going to Haruka’s hips and forcing a small distance between their bodies, much to Haruka’s annoyance. 

If there was one very basic thing humans specialized in, it was sex. For most the rest of the animal kingdom, sex meant strictly procreation. It was a natural and uncomplicated act, not drawn out and not bogged down by foreplay or other such unnecessary things. Not to say it wasn’t passionate, because it could be, but on very many levels he was sure the experience just could not compare. 

His first time with Haruka had been mind-blowing in the sense that it was completely foreign. Haruka weaved his spell expertly over Makoto, had him hot and wanting before Makoto even knew exactly what it was he desired, and he’d guided Makoto every step of the way. Makoto expected that same guidance now, needed it just as much as he’d needed it then, because it was not only Haruka’s body that was unfamiliar, but his own as well.

That being said, he fully intended to humanize their lovemaking as much as possible. Whereas the first time in Makoto’s bathtub had been fervid and almost guiltily rushed, Makoto planned to devote as much time possible memorizing each curve and crevice of Haruka’s body. Even if Haruka whined, or tried to speed things along, Makoto would not be satisfied until he’d laid Haruka completely bare and unhinged him.

Blue eyes regarded him with open frustration as Makoto settled himself back over Haruka. Makoto kissed the slight pout from Haruka’s lips, nudged his tongue past the small amount of resistance and into Haruka’s mouth where he mapped out smooth cheek walls and a rigid palate. Haruka nipped at his tongue and all but growled when Makoto broke the kiss to move lower.

“Let me.” He knew Haruka could be demanding, but just this once he wanted something about their relationship to be familiar. With everything in his life that had so violently changed recently, he needed to do this in a way that felt as comfortable as possible. “ _Please_.”

For a moment it seemed as if Haruka would argue or try to take control, resume the pace fast as he wanted. But then he relaxed, eyes softening just slightly about the corners, and tipped his head back. Even if begrudging, Makoto appreciated the indulgence.

He spent a fair amount of time at Haruka’s throat, lips ghosting the silver-toned skin and ticking up with every little twitch in reaction to when he suctioned a kiss. Now that he wasn’t getting what he wanted exactly by his own terms, Haruka was bound to make Makoto work for the satisfaction of an abandoned response. Stubborn.

Nosing at the little hairs at the base of Haruka’s neck, Makoto inhaled. He still could not figure out how his sense of smell worked – how he could breathe in just as he had in his human body, only now the water passed through him as if it were air.

Haruka’s _maessui_ stood out from any other scents, and Makoto happily let it fog his mind; guide him to the next step. He nipped at the juncture of Haruka’s neck and shoulder, a little rougher than he normally might have given his mouthful of sharp new teeth. They were not quite as frightening as Rin’s or the other _Kallotom_ , but they still did a lot more damage than his blunt human teeth and Haruka hissed, neck arching. As long as he wasn’t in pain – and he didn’t seem to be, judging in the spike of his _maessui_ ’s pungency – Makoto saw no need to stop.

He brought a hand to the light swell of Haruka’s chest, and at first marveled at the softness in comparison to the last time they’d been intimate. The pad of his thumb brushed over the nipple, and instead of whatever reaction he may have expected, he suddenly saw Haruka restrained to a gurney, pinned down by Officer Iseri while Seward sneered and barked out orders for the cruelest of punishments.

Insecurity crashed down on him, and he froze. Haruka was his mate now, this was a completely consensual act, and yet... was he taking advantage of the situation? He’d wanted to take things slowly and lavish him, but Haruka clearly hadn’t wanted it like that, had only submitted to Makoto’s whims because – well, Makoto didn’t know why. Haruka could easily have put up a fight and gotten his own way.

“Makoto.”

Makoto blinked, surprised to find they were both sitting up, Haruka in his lap and straddling him in the only way Sessa were capable of, with his tail curling around Makoto’s waist. Blue eyes studied his face intently before Haruka seemed to come to the conclusion of what was bothering him. With a frown, he petted Makoto’s hair back, pressed an understanding kiss to the crown of his head. “It’s okay, Makoto.”

“Haru...”

Haruka guided Makoto’s head back down to his chest, arched a little in encouragement, and sighed pleasurably when, after another bout of hesitation, Makoto finally latched on. “ _Lle bi Makoto_ ,” Haruka said, voice hitching just slightly, and Makoto relaxed a little more, let the words embolden him to swirl his tongue over pebbled skin and actually enjoy the little whine that earned him.

Yes, he was Makoto. He was Makoto who loved Haruka, Makoto who Haruka pursued despite the many things that separated them, Makoto who was the father of Haruka’s only child, whom Haruka had risked his own life to save. He was Makoto, whom Haruka loved.

The impatience from earlier seemed to have returned, infecting Makoto now as well. A subtle tightening of Haruka’s tail around him and Makoto felt the unquestionable prod of Haruka’s arousal against his stomach.

As he had all those years ago, Haruka assumed control. He dragged Makoto back into the sand with him, reaching between their bodies until he found the slit on Makoto’s tail. Getting used to the new anatomy wasn’t entirely difficult. Having a tail in general felt stranger than a flap of skin concealing his genitals, and in all honesty that part of him didn’t feel very different. It was still easily stimulated, still gave him problems during the night (turned out wet dreams weren’t an exclusively human experience), and it responded readily to the touch of Haruka’s fingers. Makoto gasped as Haruka massaged the slit, hips snapping forward automatically.

Haruka muffled a laugh against Makoto’s lips and Makoto batted down the vague, childish urge to bop him on the head. “Don’t tease me.”

Blue eyes sparkled with mirth, but Haruka soothed Makoto’s wounded pride with a real kiss, tongue slipping into his mouth as his hand continued to stroke leisurely at Makoto’s cock, now fully visible and twitching eagerly in anticipation. Makoto keened lowly.

It amazed him no less than three years ago – watching Haruka switch to pleasuring himself. Not for the first time he wondered how it worked, what right combination of Haruka’s caresses and curling fingers triggered the hardened flesh to unfurl like the petals of a rose catching sunlight. The sight stole Makoto’s breath, and he did not think he would ever get used to the exquisite phenomenon.

Pinning him with an expectant look, Haruka canted his hips upward. Makoto did not need to be told twice, although in his new body he was a bit slower and more uncertain when it came to positioning himself and actually following through.

Dreams and memory did not do justice to the tight heat that enveloped him. Makoto had to take pause just to gather himself, the sensation – and maybe just everything, the culmination of every painful and joyful and heart-lurching emotion he’d experienced but had to bury down over the past week suddenly rising up, flooding his senses – completely overtaking him.

He remembered the tinge of despondency that pervaded their lovemaking the first time, aiding to the desperation in his taking and the guilt that followed. None of that was present now, not when there were Haruka’s arms and Haruka’s lips and the pulsing heat of Haruka’s body to chase it away.

They moved in unison, Haruka rocking in time to each of his thrusts, driving him deeper inside until Makoto thought they might truly lock together, form one entity and never have to split apart. This especially so when Haruka’s arm slid over his tail, hitched it around him and wrapped his own around Makoto so there was no telling where one of them ended and the other began, they were just swirl of orange and azure scales glittering under the moonlight.

Strange. Makoto had been the one who wanted to make this something different, something more intimate than he thought the _Sessa_ knew. But it was Haruka who made it more meaningful than he ever could have hoped.

“I love you.” It came out in a rush, once they were both sated and coming down from the high of their respective orgasms. Makoto shivered at the brush of the odd, thread-like appendage inside of Haruka against his length. He wasn’t sure Haruka even heard him until a blue eye cracked open to regard him lethargically. “I have, since – since I first saw you.” Because Haruka was so beautiful, and because some part of him had just _known_ , somehow, that they were meant to be together. Maybe some instinct preserved from the first _Sessmalla_ , his ancestor Tachibana who fell in love with the marooned human sailor, but he’d felt drawn to Haruka the moment he’d laid eyes on him, and had known even when they parted ways on the beach that that wouldn’t be the end of them.

It was hard to tell if the words embarrassed him, as his skin was already flushed from their recent activity, but Haruka did not turn away as he ordinarily might have. Instead he tightened his arms around Makoto, declared, “Makoto is mine. Always,” and kissed him.

The possessiveness sparked a fresh wave of arousal in Makoto, which Haruka noticed right away. He whispered something teasingly against Makoto’s lips, too quiet to pick up on, and then very quickly slid down the length of Makoto’s body.

Makoto watched, knocking pearls loose burying his hand in silken black hair, as Haruka bumped his nose to a frayed pelvic fin. Before Makoto could realize what he was doing, Haruka opened his mouth, suctioned on to Makoto’s slit, and very skillfully disproved every assumption that _Sessa_ knew nothing about foreplay.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're interested in following my tumblr, my username has changed to: actual-pixie.tumblr.com.  
> ^_^ 
> 
>  
> 
> SESSLO’ÔNG TO ENGLISH DICTIONARY
> 
> Bi (bee): is/am/are/was  
> Kallot’kar (kayot-car): a form of address from one Kallotom to another, usually a junior to an elder.  
> Kallotom (kayo-tome): hunter/warrior, often travels close to the surface in search for food and to ensure an area is clear of predators; can also be used as a plural for a group of hunters  
> Le-Le (leh-leh): look  
> Lle (yeh): you/your  
> Lle ffha (Yeh-fah): yours (belonging to you)  
> Lli ffha (Yee-fah): his/hers/theirs (belonging to him/her/them)  
> Llo (yoh): I/my/me  
> Llo ffha (yoh-fah): mine (belonging to me)  
> Llo graes (yoh grays): my thanks/thank you   
> Naraei (nah-rye): stop   
> Nulma (nool-mah): love  
> Nulpaar (nool-par): blessed love. Also the name of the Sessa’s mating ceremony.  
> Peshjiuun lle bi llo ffha (pesh-gee-un yeh bee yoh-fah): a piece of you is mine  
> Peshjiuun Llo bi lle ffha (pesh-gee-un yoh bee yeh-fah): a piece of me is yours  
> Sessa (sess-ah): an average mermaid or merman, or a group of mer  
> Sessmalla (sess-mah-yah): chosen of mermaids (reserved for third gender only)  
> Sjahlaa (shah-lah): silence/be quiet.   
> Sjilla (shee-yah): gender-neutral term for a parent.  
> Suumëv Malla bi sjilla hehellôn (Soo-mev ma-yah bee shee-yah heh-heh-yon): until Malla is mother no longer.
> 
> Song of Nulpaar  
> Malla, Malla, Le-le Malla  
> Le-le Malla, Malla  
> Sjahlaa, Malla, sjahlaa  
> Le-le, bi nulma 
> 
> (Malla, Malla, look Malla  
> Look Malla, Malla  
> Quietly, Malla, quietly  
> Look, it is love)
> 
> Paar, Malla  
> Sjahlaa paar  
> Bi Sessa illenaar  
> Malla, paar nulma 
> 
> (Blessings, Malla  
> Silent blessings  
> For [the] united Sessa  
> Malla, bless love)
> 
> Paar, Malla  
> Malla paar nulma  
> Paar Sessa, lle bahswi 
> 
> (Blessings, Malla  
> Malla, bless love  
> Bless [the] Sessa, your children)
> 
> Nulpaar, Nulpaar!  
> Sessa illenaar bi paar  
> Malla, sjilla, paar lli  
> Le-le, bi Nulpaar! 
> 
> (Blessed love, blessed love!  
> United Sessa are blessed  
> The mother Malla blesses them  
> Look, it is [a] blessed love!)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The promised epilogue! Thanks for reading along! This has been such a joy to write, and really was a great exercise in pushing my creative boundaries :)

“I think I see him!”

The shrill cry broke through the quiet mist of daybreak. Rei jerked up from his lethargic half-sleep, rubbing sleep from his eyes, and reached blindly for his glasses. “Nagisa, this is the third time. I swear to God—”

“No, really,” Nagisa whined, nearly tripping over his feet to reach the bow of the dinged-up shrimping vessel. Before he could completely lose balance and tumble into the waves, he caught the low guardrail. “Look, Rei-chan! The island straight-ahead, by the mangroves. I definitely saw a tail.”

Rei glanced sidelong at the makeshift bed of towels before he heaved a sigh and, at a much more sedate pace, approached the bow as well. The early morning chill bit at him as a breeze ruffled his clothes, and he shivered, wishing Nagisa’s odd premonition the day before hadn’t come to him before winter let up.

Nagisa strained on his tiptoes, leaning over the boat as much as his balance would allow, magenta eyes narrow and searching. Over the glare of newly risen sun on water, Rei caught not even a glimmer of a tailfin. He didn’t speak until the blond’s shoulders sagged visibly, and then it was with a sympathetic tone. “Nagisa, I told you it was unlikely.”

Nagisa frowned. “I thought for sure…” His voice trailed off, nose scrunching. Then he shook his head. “No, it’s been three years. There’s no reason for them to stay away any longer than this.”

“Unless the pod moved on from Iwatobi?” A lot could have changed in three years; the ecosystem the _Sessa_ lived in before could very well no longer be a safe environment for them to live. It was very possible the pod had returned, as they’d been told it would after the newborn young grew enough to handle the long migration, but been forced to move again because of time’s effect on the reefs.

“No way. Makoto couldn’t bear to be away forever, and Haruka would do whatever it takes to keep Makoto happy.”

True. It would take something drastic to separate Makoto from Iwatobi entirely. The fact his communication with his friends was now so limited had to be trying enough on him, gentle spirit that he was; there was no way he’d sever ties altogether. And Haruka was so attached to him, he _would_ go along with whatever Makoto wanted, even if it meant abandoning the rest of the pod.

They were a truly fascinating culture, and Haruka even more intriguing that the rest. Rei had spent the last years compiling hypothesis and conducting research, wanting to keep his promise to the _Sessa_ to preserve their hidden existence but also unable to abate his own curiosity.

Only a small number of people knew of what occurred on the research vessel three years ago, when Haruka had been captured and then he and Makoto both lost to the sea. Seward had been effectively shut down, barred from the scientific community for the mistreatment of her subjects, but the research of mermaids and other supposedly-fictitious marine life could not be put to rest so easily, not with an entire staff having bore witness to Haruka’s existence. So Rei had taken over. Kept his crew of researchers small and trustworthy – Dr. Amakata and a few others who’d helped wrangle control from Seward, and Nagisa of course – and mandated observational study only. He was sure the _Sessa_ still would be displeased when they found out, but at this point, if Rei hadn’t taken over the venture someone else would have, and it had already been proven that others were not always as respectful.

A squeal from the other end of the boat captured Rei’s attention.

Right, he’d almost forgotten the other guests Nagisa acquired for this trip. Not any of the researchers from their facility, but a group of far greater importance.

“It’s Makoto!”

Nagisa’s head whipped up, all traces of dejection immediately wiped clean and replaced with a brilliant grin. He grabbed Rei by the shoulders, leaned in like he might kiss him. Rei’s eyes widened behind his glasses, color rushing to his face, but in the end Nagisa only gave him a friendly shake and cheered, “I knew it!” before bolting off to the stern.

It took only another few seconds before Rei joined him. The Tachibana family already gathered about the rear of the boat, with Makoto’s younger siblings standing on the guardrail waving excitedly to the open ocean and their father nervously holding each of them about the waist so they wouldn’t fall. Their mother hung back, seeming unsure, and Rei couldn’t really blame her. Three years ago her son disappeared without even a word, with the only assurance he was still alive coming from, according to Nagisa, a mermaid. Who knew what she expected to find now.

Rei gave her space, squeezed in alongside Nagisa. Relief stole his breath when he caught sight of the brown head poking up from the water several meters away. 

“Makoto,” Ran cried, “over here!” Then, to her twin brother: “what if he doesn’t recognize us?” They’d gone through quite a growth spurt in the last few years, no longer the little children doted on by their big brother.

Another head broke the surface next to Makoto’s.

“Ah, it’s Haruka!” Nagisa clapped his hands in delight.

Rei squinted, leaned forward to get a better look. His binoculars were somewhere below deck, and he cursed his ill fortune for having forgotten them there. Still, even if he’d only seen Haruka the one time, he could tell this _Sessa_ was too small. “I don’t think that’s him.”

As if to prove her correct, the black-haired _Sessa_ jumped from the water with an excited whistle that carried all the way to the boat. The Tachibanas gave a collective gasp of awe. Probably none of them had fully believed the story, but now there was physical proof: a magnificent azure tail attached to the body of a young boy, who now far outpaced his father in their swim to the boat.

“Mi-chan, is that you?” Nagisa’s eyes bugged. “How did you get so big in only three years?” Mieko beamed, reaching for leverage on the side of the ship to hoist himself upwards and get a better view of everyone. “Still very curious, I see.”

“Uncle Nagisa,” Mieko chirped, his flawless Japanese shocking everyone aboard. “ _Sjilla_ did not believe it was you, but I knew it!”

Rei blinked. “You knew we were coming?”

Mieko glanced to him, and it was strange seeing Makoto’s face on someone else. The child’s hair and eyes were the wrong color, but every other little detail – light freckles on the nose, downturned eyes, perpetual smile – was nearly identical. “The _Kallotom_ said they found a boat,” he explained. “Rin described it. He described all of you, and I knew it had to be Uncle Nagisa coming to meet us after the migration!”

“Mieko, you shouldn’t swim off like that.”

Mieko flinched at the scolding tone of his father’s voice, and sent an apologetic smile to Makoto. Makoto’s gaze held its severity only briefly before giving way to affection, then apprehension as he looked upon his family for the first time in years. “Ran, Ren... you’ve gotten so big.”

Rei did not have to look to know the twins were crying.

“Makoto, it’s really you. You’re really...”

“You’re alive.”

All eyes flickered to Mrs. Tachibana; Makoto’s looking the guiltiest of all. Makoto swam up to the side of the boat, having a much easier time pulling himself up than Mieko did. Unlike Mieko, he did not have to mind keeping his tail submerged, and the awed inhale as the orange scales caught the sunlight had Makoto blushing in embarrassment.

The twins scrambled down from the railing, got on their bellies to get a better look. Rei could practically feel the desire rolling off of Nagisa to do the same.

“Is it real?” Ran wondered, just as Ren asked, “can I touch it?”

Makoto laughed nervously. “I guess so.”

The twins grinned and did not hesitate, and as they ran their hands over what would once have been Makoto’s foreleg, Nagisa pouted and complained, “I want to feel Makoto’s tail too.” Color darkened Makoto’s cheeks, and he ducked his head to hide it.

Ren managed to meet his brother’s eyes. “What’s it like? Does it feel weird?”

Makoto shrugged, looking rather uncomfortable under the attention. “I guess it was at first, but... it wasn’t the hardest thing to get used to.” He left it for everyone to make his or her own assumptions about what was, but from the obvious pain on his face it was easy for anyone to guess.

“We missed you,” Mr. Tachibana said honestly.

Makoto swallowed, nodded his head, and Rei could tell he was trying very hard – probably for the sake of both the twins and Mieko – not to cry. “I missed you too. I wanted to— I wanted to see you all, after it happened. So you knew I was okay. But I wasn’t... it was too dangerous.”

In place of Makoto or even Haruka, Rin had been sent to deliver the message, the task deemed too risky for anyone but one of the _Kallotom_ adept with traveling near the surface and familiar with the area. His words were brief: Makoto was alive but could not return until the area was considered safe again, and that in the upcoming few months the pod would be migrating to warmer waters. Three years, he’d said; that would be the very soonest they’d see Makoto again.

Mrs. Tachibana knelt beside her son, hesitating before placing a hand on his head. “I’m just happy you’re alive. We were so afraid...” Her voice trailed off and she seemed to visibly shake the negative thoughts away. When she spoke again, it was with genuine happiness. “Is this my grandson?”

Makoto’s expression brightened, and he beckoned Mieko to come closer. Mieko inched over, his flukes still submerged beneath the water. “This is Mieko. He’s the oldest.”

“Oldest?” Nagisa smirked. “You and Haruka have been busy, I – _ouch_ , Rei-chan!” Rei only rolled his eyes as Nagisa made a show of rubbing the spot where he’d hit him in the arm.

Mieko tilted his head to the side. “ _Sjilla_ should have many children. Our genes are favorable.” Clearly it was something that had been told to him over and over again, and the mortified look Makoto sent him made the obvious parroting all the more humorous.

“Don’t laugh!” Makoto cried, betrayed his parents would go along with it. “He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

The Tachibanas laughed anyways, because even with all the things that had changed, Makoto was still Makoto.

A low whistle in the distance drew Makoto and Mieko’s attention.

“ _Sjilla_!” Mieko released the ledge of the boat and fell back into the water in a move only a _Sessa_ could make graceful. He whistled and clicked and then disappeared beneath the waves, popping up again a few meters out, dragging someone with him.

Haruka, when he finally reached the boat, looked at Rei just as distrustfully as he had when they’d last met on the boat. He made no attempt to raise himself out of the water, but rather hung behind Makoto, justifiably hesitant. Only when Makoto lowered himself back into the water (much to the disappointment of the twins) did Haruka seemed to relax. He laid a hand on Haruka’s shoulder, and the affection that stole over his features was heartwarming to look upon.

“This is Haruka,” he said, a tint of pride to his voice. Haruka nodded in greeting, but that seemed about as friendly as he was willing to get.  “He’s the leader of our pod, and—” Makoto broke off in a small laugh, mirthful green eyes darting down to the water. His tail vaulted up, the frilled base fin breaking the surface to reveal another small child clinging on. The youngling shrieked in delight, flailing its arms and splashing water in every direction. “This troublemaker is Chise. She’s almost three.”

“They look like you, Makoto,” Mrs. Tachibana said, her tone wistful.

Mieko and Chise had inherited traits from both their parents. While Mieko had his mother’s hair and eye color and petite build, Chise possessed Makoto’s coarse brown hair, which fell to her chin in messy waves, and seemed to have his broader torso as well. But her eyes and small mouth were completely Haruka’s, as well as the shimmering azure tail.

Ran scrunched up her nose. “But prettier.”

Makoto looked torn between offense and amusement. In the end, he conceded with a shrug. “I guess that’s Haruka’s influence.”

Chise moved to cling on to Makoto’s neck, clicking all the while. Rei wondered at what age the _Sessa_ developed the ability to talk. Nagisa told him once that Mieko, at the same age, had been able to say a few words and probably would have been even more talkative had he actually known the language. But Chise seemed content with her clicks and whistles. At one point she even leaned back, dipped her head halfway into the water, and started blowing bubbles through her mouth. This only stopped when Haruka swam around and physically pulled her away from Makoto. Her lower lip trembled. She didn’t even need to be scolded in any verbal way; the stern disapproval on Haruka’s face enough to send her burying her face in her mother’s neck while reaching blindly for her father.

Rei could already tell she was a handful.

Ran sat down on the edge of the boat, allowing her legs to dangle over the side. “Can I hold her?” she asked, hopeful.

In response, Haruka put another two feet of distance between himself and the boat. As if Ran or any one of them might reach down and pluck the child from his arms.

Makoto sighed. “It’s probably better if you don’t.”

“I wouldn’t hurt her,” Ran insisted. “I’ve held a baby before, nii-chan, I can be careful.”

Thankfully Nagisa actually came to Makoto’s defense for once. “It’s not that. Mi-chan and Chise shouldn’t be out of the water, that’s all.”

“It hurts,” Mieko elaborated. He stared at Ran’s legs with interest. “We can go on land, unlike other _Sessa_ , but it hurts.” After a small bout of hesitation, he reached up and touched her big toe between his thumb and pointer finger. “Why are they red? Are you hurt?”

Ran giggled and wiggled her toes for him. “It’s nail polish,” she explained, which served little more than to double Mieko’s confusion. He looked to Makoto for some kind of guidance.

Makoto stifled a laugh of his own. “Human girls sometimes paint their toes different colors.”

The answer did not satisfy Mieko at all. “But why?”

Haruka, who had gradually sidled back up next to Makoto, gave his interpretation of the undoubtedly bizarre human ritual. “It is like wearing pearls in your hair.”

No one on the boat understood why that made Makoto blush until Mieko gasped in understanding and turned back to Ran. “So you are trying to attract a mate?”

“No she is not!” Makoto cried. He glared at Haruka, but it lacked any true menace. “That’s not what it means at all!”

Haruka shrugged indifferently.

“I like it,” Mieko said, his attention glued to Ran’s feet. “It would definitely attract me.”

Nagisa burst out laughing. “Oh my God, Mi-chan is such a flirt!” He pointed accusingly at Makoto. “It’s your fault. He gets it from you, I bet.”

Makoto’s voice came out muffled from how he was currently hiding his face behind his hands. “I don’t even know what you’re talking about— ah, Haru, _stop_!" His hands immediately went to Haruka’s shoulders, easing Haruka out of the protective stance he’d taken in front of him. Haruka clicked defensively, gaze narrowed on Nagisa in distaste, and was only appeased when Makoto briefly dipped his head and whispered something indiscernible.

Between two feisty children and an overprotective mate, Makoto certainly had his hands full. Rei shook his head in sympathy. Thankfully Nagisa eased up a bit on his teasing. They needed the _Sessa_ to like them if they ever hoped to see Makoto again, much less study the species as a whole.

Rei took the opportunity to ask about the migration – where the pod went and what they did during such a long period of absence. Makoto could not tell him where, though Rei couldn’t be sure if this was due to a lack of knowing or because there were unspoken rules about revealing such details, but he was more than happy to divulge how during the migration the new young were born. His pride in telling how Haruka helped raise the pod’s newborns was so obvious it made Haruka blush and disappear below the surface for several minutes.  

“Is Haruka shy?” Ren asked, peering intently at the spot where Haruka had been.

Makoto smiled fondly. “Not really. He probably thinks I’m just saying something unnecessary. Haruka.” He made a distinct clicking sound, which didn’t sound quite as natural as the noises Haruka or their children made but still did its job of summoning the other _Sessa_.

“I’m happy for you, Makoto,” Mrs. Tachibana said, as she watched her oldest son surrounded by his new family. They were different in ways a normal human family couldn’t even dream, and yet it was so obvious to see the love flowing between them, as it would between a human mother and father.

“Mom—” Makoto cut off, swallowed, and met his mother’s gaze. There was so much in that expression – regret for all the things he’d done or hadn’t done, said or hadn’t said. “I’m sorry. I wish—I wish things could be different.”

“I don’t.” Makoto’s eyes widened as Mrs. Tachibana knelt at the edge of the boat and extended a hand toward him. He went without hesitation, closed his eyes tightly as she cupped his cheek in a palm. “My boy... you’re right where you need to be,” she told him. Makoto blinked his eyes back open, attempted to protest, but she only smiled. “All children leave their parents someday. It’s just a part of life.”

“Most children can pick up a phone and call,” he argued. It would be a long time yet before he forgave himself for what Rei imagined he considered abandoning his parents and siblings. Makoto’s heart was too big for his own good.

Mrs. Tachibana patted his cheek. “We’ll see each other again,” she promised. “I don’t mind a trip on a boat every once and a while.” Her gaze shifted to Haruka, and there were no signs of aggression from him in response. Instead he slowly came up to the side of the boat, ducked his head when she reached down to stroke his hair. “You take care of my son.”

It wasn’t a request, but Haruka nodded as if it were. “Always.”

After that, Chise began to fuss. Bored or hungry or both. Haruka lifted the toddler unashamedly to his breast, only to make a sour face as Makoto very loudly objected, “not in front of the twins!”

Haruka raised an eyebrow, looked slowly between the boat and Chise. “She probably wouldn’t take it anyways,” he said after a moment, disappointment leaking into the apathetic tone of his voice. He met Mrs. Tachibana’s eyes and gave a nod, and then he disappeared beneath the water, carrying Chise with him. Rei knew he wouldn’t surface again this visit.

“Chise weaned early,” Makoto explained. “I think she wanted to catch up with her brother.”

Silence hung between them. There was so much Rei wanted to say and ask still, but it no longer seemed like the appropriate time. As much as he could have spent the entire day learning all the _Sessa_ family could teach him (and still not be satisfied at the end of it), he knew the risks involved with them staying above surface so long, and so did everyone else. The time limit hung above their heads, an unmentionable taboo that now turned the conversation stinted and had even the twins withdrawing.

Makoto echoed his mother’s earlier promise: “We’ll see each other again.” But that didn’t erase the fresh track of tears as he embraced his little brother and sister a final time. “I love you guys.”

“We love you too,” Ran sniveled, her head buried in Makoto’s damp hair.

“V-visit us again,” Ren said, wiping his nose on his arm.

“I will,” Makoto said. He squeezed them again, because who knew how much they would grow between now and the next time he saw them. They would only be young and want him to hug them for so long.

“Can you paint them yellow next time?” Mieko asked, his eyes again glued to Ran’s feet. Makoto frowned, but Ran giggled and promised she would paint them yellow just for Mieko.

The farewells to Rei and Nagisa were less tearful. Makoto thanked them for everything they’d done, and made promises to see them both again. It was relatively quiet, up until Makoto turned to go. Then Nagisa burst out, “we love you, Makoto!”

The twins jumped back on to the guardrail to wave excitedly as they had when the first glimpsed their brother. As the sun inched out from behind a cloud, now at its peak in the sky, it encompassed everything in its warm glow. And with the nurturing warmth, the sadness seemed to melt away from the Tachibanas, even Makoto. Because this wasn’t goodbye, not really.

They’d see each other again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a chapter, just a glossary/dictionary of terms and phrases used throughout the story.

**GLOSSARY**

 

 **Awakening:** The point when a Sessa reaches sexual maturity, their version of puberty. Once a Sessa reaches their sexual maturity they are considered Awakened. Females grow a bit more, their breasts develop, they begin to produce _maessui_ oils to attract mates, and their teeth become sharper (though not as large or sharp as male's teeth); males grow larger, stronger, and their teeth and nails sharpen for better hunting.

 

 **Courting Behavior of Males:** When a Sessa male courts a female, he will bring her gifts to show his intention for them to become mates. Generally a Sessa takes only one mate (with the exception of some higher-ranking Sessa - Sessmalla or Sesshulla, and even some of the more revered Kallotom) so these gifts are not given or accepted lightly. Gifts can range from a bouquet of sea fans, to impressively sized shark teeth, to pearls and other precious stones (the Sessa particularly like shiny, attractive things like jewelry), or even a male bringing a female a meal that he hunted himself. Courting behavior exhibited by females includes females wearing pearls in their hair, moisturizing in front of a certain male, or inviting a male to brush her hair.

 

 **Kallotom:** The hunters and warriors of the Sessa. They are in charge of both ensuring the safety of the pod and leading the pod to food.

**Maessui** : A special, sweet-smelling oil secreted from glands atop a matured female Sessa's head, which stimulates arousal in males. When a female wishes to attract a mate, she will moisturize with these oils by running her hands through her hair to gather the oil then rubbing it into the skin of her arms, torso, etc.

**Malla:** The sun, revered by the Sessa as a goddess and the giver of all life.

 

 **Malla Cycle:** Roughly a year.

 

 **Nulpaar:** The mating ritual of the Sessa. Consists of a formal ceremony led by the pod’s leader, during which Intended pair verbally claim one another with Malla as witness, and then perform a ritual dance.

**Sessa:** The average mer, male or female.

**Sesshulla:** The chosen pod leader, if there is no Sessmalla. Typically the strongest female assumes the title of Sesshulla, and this title may be passed down to her oldest daughter should she also prove strong enough. In Haruka's pod, since he is Sessmalla, there is no Sesshulla.

**Sesslo’ông:** The language of the Sessa. While Sessa may know odd words and phrases in human languages (Kallotom especially, as they spend the most time near the surface), the Sessa prefer their native tongue. Most of the time in the ocean, the Sessa communicate through whistles and clicks as most sea mammals do; these sounds carry better through the water, and so it is logical they use this method most often. Each of these sounds translates to a Sesslo’ông word.

 

 **Sessmalla:** Refers to the hermaphroditic third gender of the Sessa. Sessmalla are very rare and prized among their species, considered Malla’s favored children. They are typically the leaders of their pod, the alpha (so to speak) that the males and females of the group all mate with. While a male and female Sessa can also mate and have children, it’s more desirable to procreate with the third gender because they are typically healthier and more likely to carry a baby to term.

 

 

**SESSLO’ÔNG TO ENGLISH DICTIONARY**

**Bi** (bee): is/am/are/was

 **Kallot’kar** (kayot-car): a form of address from one Kallotom to another, usually a junior to an elder.

 **Kallotom** (kayo-tome): hunter/warrior, often travels close to the surface in search for food and to ensure an area is clear of predators; can also be used as a plural for a group of hunters

 **Le-Le**  (leh-leh): look

 **Lle** (yeh): you/your

 **Lle ffha** (Yeh-fah): yours (belonging to you)

 **Lli ffha** (Yee-fah): his/hers/theirs (belonging to him/her/them)

 **Llo** (yoh): I/my/me

 **Llo ffha** (yoh-fah): mine (belonging to me)

 **Llo graes** (yoh grays): my thanks/thank you 

 **Naraei** (nah-rye): stop 

 **Nulma** (nool-mah): love

 **Nulpaar** (nool-par): blessed love. Also the name of the Sessa’s mating ceremony.

 **Peshjiuun lle bi llo ffha** (pesh-gee-un yeh bee yoh-fah): a piece of you is mine

 **Peshjiuun Llo bi lle ffha** (pesh-gee-un yoh bee yeh-fah): a piece of me is yours

 **Sessa** (sess-ah): an average mermaid or merman, or a group of mer

 **Sessmalla** (sess-mah-yah): chosen of mermaids (reserved for third gender only)

 **Sjahlaa** (shah-lah): silence/be quiet. 

 **Sjilla** (shee-yah): gender-neutral term for a parent.

 **Suumëv Malla bi sjilla hehellôn** (Soo-mev ma-yah bee shee-yah heh-heh-yon): until Malla is mother no longer.

 

**Song of Nulpaar**

_Malla, Malla, Le-le Malla_

_Le-le Malla, Malla_

_Sjahlaa, Malla, sjahlaa_

_Le-lé, bi nulma_

 

(Malla, Malla, look Malla

Look Malla, Malla

Quietly, Malla, quietly

Look, it is love)

 

_Paar, Malla_

_Sjahlaa paar_

_Bi Sessa illenaar_

_Malla, paar nulma_

 

(Blessings, Malla

Silent blessings

For [the] united Sessa

Malla, bless love)

 

_Paar, Malla_

_Malla paar nulma_

_Paar Sessa, lle bahswi_

 

(Blessings, Malla

Malla, bless love

Bless [the] Sessa, your children)

 

_Nulpaar, Nulpaar!_

_Sessa illenaar bi paar_

_Malla, sjilla, paar lli_

_Le-lé, bi Nulpaar!_

 

(Blessed love, blessed love!

United Sessa are blessed

The mother Malla blesses them

Look, it is [a] blessed love!)

 


End file.
